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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel traumatised?

181 replies

cattypussclaw · 06/05/2021 09:01

So yesterday I had a hysteroscopy. It was very very painful. I cried, I nearly threw up and I passed out at one point. They asked if I wanted them to stop but all I could think was that they'd only want to do this to me again and I couldn't face that. In fact, no medical person is carrying out any procedure on me again unless I am out cold.

I was told it would be particularly painful for me as I haven't given birth (one child, non-elective c-section) so my cervix is very tight. I asked why no anaesthetic and the gynaecologist's reply was "Because you're a woman, no man would tolerate this".

I'm usually OK with medical procedures. I'm in the "just get it over with" camp and have no problem with needles and - I thought - a pretty high pain threshold.

It was the most unpleasant and agonising experience of my life and I honestly feel a bit traumatised. AIBU to think that no woman should be expected to go through this? Or am I just a wuss as I haven't been through the pain of childbirth?

OP posts:
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6
Originalyellowbelly · 06/05/2021 14:04

Sorry, had to go answer the door. What I wanted to say is that I'm horrified this procedure is still being done exactly as it was done to me 22 yrs ago. Surely, as they know how painful it is, pain relief should be given as a matter of course, or doesn't it matter as it's only women who have to go through this.

LilacSloth · 06/05/2021 14:21

I'm sorry this happened to you. It's outrageous. Definitely complain to PALS. The pain I experienced while being induced was the worst I've ever known. I have no idea why pain relief isn't offered as standard. It's barbaric.

Looubylou · 06/05/2021 14:23

I had similar experience with egg collection - given codeine to take prior. Excruciating on one side only - other side OK. I had problems for about 5 years afterwards with pains/feeling of swelling on that side, which was dismissed by doctors despite it affecting my work/life. It was a long time before my brain linked the 2 experiences. I now know other trusts offer anaesthetic for this procedure. I wish I had complained for the sake of others. I hope you feel better soon and please don't let this put you off any future investigations or treatments - just discuss the options first.

traumaticconversations · 06/05/2021 14:24

@ChameleonKola

I remember showing up to a urology appointment thinking it was just a conversation, and finding the room set up to do a cystoscopy without a general anaesthetic. I had previously had them done before under a general. One of my presenting problems was excruciating urethral and bladder pain on a daily basis yet they expected me to lie there awake and allow them to put a camera into my bladder? I refused obviously.

Absolutely appalling. It really angers me that not everyone feels able to say no, to demand pain relief, or to walk out. So many women being put through excruciating examinations and procedures.

I get cystoscopies regularly for long term bladder problems - usually a rigid under GA - consultant said they’re trying to move to all being done under local in a clinic instead, which would include having my urethra stretched to ten times the original size .

Needless to say I’m now refusing to go back - no way . Neighbour had to try a local for a biopsy of bladder cancer - passed out in pain . Hell .

GrumpyTerrier · 06/05/2021 14:50

Can you have these under sedation? I had sedation when I had a gasteroscopy. Like when you are not totally unconscious but very out of it. I don't remember the procedure at all, just suddenly being back in the bed.

They want to give me a hysteroscopy and I was already thinking nope but also was going to request to have it done under sedation.

JaneJeffer · 06/05/2021 15:03

YANBU. It's horrible and so painful which I didn't get warned about beforehand and I bled for ages afterwards.

Anotherbleedingpapercut · 06/05/2021 15:29

I’m actually raging for you here op!!! How in the name of all that’s good and holy are women still put through this shit. I had one under general anaesthesic last year (didn’t feel a thing) and still walked out of the hospital like John Wayne after being punched in the stomach. This is not something that should be done without some kind of anaesthetic. I’m so sorry you went through that.

Original poster
cattypussclaw · 06/05/2021 18:04

Thank you all for your kind and supportive words, it means the world right now to know I'm not alone. My husband is lovely and has given me lots of tea and cuddles today but he just cannot ever know what the pain was like. Only women can know that.

I don't know how to tag people but, yes, Grumpy Terrier you can have sedation but it wasn't mentioned to me. And I didn't ask as I thought we were talking smear test pain levels. I had my wisdom teeth out under sedation a couple of years ago. No memory of it but "woke up" with less teeth and very little pain.

Really appreciate every single reply. I've posted the link to the campaign on my Facebook page. Obviously it's over-sharing on a huge scale but I don't care who knows now, I just don't want anyone to have that pain when it can be so easily avoided.

I will let you know when I have a response from my GP surgery to my complaint. I just want as many women as I can reach to be warned about this barbaric procedure.

OP posts:
ChameleonKola · 06/05/2021 18:37

@traumaticconversations

I wonder if it’s a move to just reduce the number of surgeries, investigations and subsequent treatments in that area of medicine by forcing patients to essentially discharge themselves without treatment. Urethral dilation is part of my treatment too and something they wanted to do under a local at that appointment. It’s absolutely fucking barbaric and this thread has really appalled and upset me.

bathpostcardquery · 06/05/2021 19:30

[quote ChameleonKola]@traumaticconversations

I wonder if it’s a move to just reduce the number of surgeries, investigations and subsequent treatments in that area of medicine by forcing patients to essentially discharge themselves without treatment. Urethral dilation is part of my treatment too and something they wanted to do under a local at that appointment. It’s absolutely fucking barbaric and this thread has really appalled and upset me.[/quote]
Me too . I didn’t realise how many other poor women have been in this position too . I’ve had gynae problems since I was sixteen, and diagnosed with ptsd as a direct result of the way I’ve been treated over time . Therapist told me last night that at least once it crossed the line to sexual assault .

It’s high time they made massive changes to the way women’s health is handled by the NHS - I remember watching something recorded from the House of Commons about the same thing . It’s barbaric .

And men would absolutely not be treated in the same manner...

bathpostcardquery · 06/05/2021 19:31

Fuck . Name change fail !

Dingleydel · 06/05/2021 19:41

Oh lord, doesn’t this involve dilating your cervix? Can’t believe they would do anything that involved that without a general. How awful.

LunaTheCat · 06/05/2021 19:49

@sadpapercourtesan

ShirleyPhallus I know that moment of pure transcendental agony you're talking about! When I was failing to progress the last couple of cm, a male consultant strode into the room, didn't even make eye contact with me, shoved his hand up there and basically tore me, then said "now she can push", then strode out again. It was a moment I've never been able to describe, like the whole world turned to ice for a couple of seconds. I get flashbacks to it.
That is dreadful. ? How long ago. I hope that wouldn’t happen now.
Oldraver · 06/05/2021 19:50

It bloody annoys ne the level of pain women are supposed to put up with

I had a friend who had a bit of cervix nipped off, they quickly said they were going to do do it and she said it was horrendously painful

I had to several breast biopsies and they admitted they couldn't get the sample they wanted as there was a technical hitch. The local had worn off and they tried to do it without and said "oh if you can just put up with it a little more". I insisted on more local. I cant for the life of me understand why they are stingy with it

Howzaboutye · 06/05/2021 20:02

OP Stoke Mandeville is shit for women. A good friend had her baby there and she would have been given better care by a vet. Horrendous, absolutely not woman-centered care.
It is appalling and should be unacceptable. But sadly not.

FindingMeno · 06/05/2021 20:02

I've had a hysteroscopy without anaesthesia a couple of years ago. Although I have never been through labour I found it not too bad. I was told throughout the procedure that if I couldn't tolerate it, they would book in for it being done under anaesthesia.
I'm glad I had the choice to try without anaesthesia personally, but was also given the choice to stop.
I suppose we're all different, and I really feel for women who've had a horrible experience.

MrsClatterbuck · 06/05/2021 20:10

I had this procedure a number of years ago. I had been for my smear and had been having some bleeding post menopause. They did a vaginal ultrasound and I thought that was that. Then the female gynaecologist proceeded to do the hysteroscopy. Nothing was explained to me at all. My initial thought was why were they doing a smear as I had already had that done by the GP. Then the realisation that it wasn't a smear but something different which was very painful. Why can't they do sedation like they do with a colonoscopy or endoscopy. I have had both. Fortunately I didn't feel faint or anything but I do remember that the gynaecologist wasn't actually very nice about it and was a bit rough in my opinion.

MrsClatterbuck · 06/05/2021 20:13

Men have colonoscopies and endoscopies so maybe that's why sedation is offered.

Sockbogies · 06/05/2021 20:23

So this is the NHS guidance. It might not hurt too much but it also might hurt so much that you may need to tell them to stop. If you are brave enough, not traumatised, feel it's ok to "make a fuss".

Since when would you have dental work or any other type of surgery done without any clear guidance on anaesthetic, and rely on the patient saying so if it all gets too much.

I was meant to have this done under a local and when I read the description of the procedure I refused.

It is SURGERY on an internal organ.

AIBU to feel traumatised?
DramaAlpaca · 06/05/2021 20:23

@Howzaboutye

OP Stoke Mandeville is shit for women. A good friend had her baby there and she would have been given better care by a vet. Horrendous, absolutely not woman-centered care. It is appalling and should be unacceptable. But sadly not.
I had DS2 there 25 years ago and it wasn't the best experience. I couldn't wait to get out of there and luckily I was able to escape quickly. I'm sorry to hear it hasn't changed.

OP, I'm appalled you didn't have a GA for your procedure. I did, I wouldn't have consented to it otherwise. Women shouldn't have to put up with that.

I had a nasty experience under sedation when I had a colonoscopy but I could still feel everything being done to me. I was very distressed afterwards. I had a follow up meeting with the consultant, who talked me through it and eventually apologised for me experiencing pain. It helped me a lot that I was listened to. It might be helpful to you to arrange a debrief too.

JulietMadeChutney · 06/05/2021 21:00

I have had 4. First under general and next 3 with a local. The local injection was not great fun - but eminently bareable. I cannot imagine having gone through them without it though!

PeanutbutterPickle · 06/05/2021 21:56

So sorry you had this experience. I had a hysteroscopy under GA - at my local hospital they always do this procedure under GA as think it too painful otherwise

KarmaIsAnAngel · 06/05/2021 22:21

@Sockbogies

So this is the NHS guidance. It might not hurt too much but it also might hurt so much that you may need to tell them to stop. If you are brave enough, not traumatised, feel it's ok to "make a fuss".

Since when would you have dental work or any other type of surgery done without any clear guidance on anaesthetic, and rely on the patient saying so if it all gets too much.

I was meant to have this done under a local and when I read the description of the procedure I refused.

It is SURGERY on an internal organ.

Your comment was a lightbulb moment to me.

It’s an INTERNAL ORGAN

just because you can reach it via the vagina doesn’t make it any less of an internal organ, any more than your stomach stops being an internal organ because you can have a camera down there too.

I’ve always found cervical screening excruciatingly painful and always thought I was just being a wuss, but your cervix truly isn’t supposed to be experiencing scraping, stretching etc. in any context other than a baby coming out, which we rightly regard as being one of the worst pains imaginable.

wearetheweirdosmr · 06/05/2021 22:24

Fucking hell I had a GA for both of mine!

You are extremely brave
Well done

TheCrowening · 06/05/2021 22:25

@traumaticconversations

YANBU . I got taken in for a coil fitting - with all manner of issues down below, terrified of internals but told had to try without anaesthetic - told I had to try it for suspected endometriosis .

Twenty minutes that consultant tried to force the coil in - at one point almost ramrodding it . Ended up with heavy bleeding and numb for a few hours . She threw the speculum across the room when I asked her to please stop ... had to go back to work to complete a 12 hour shift . I remember sitting sobbing in the toilet .

It’s hell and I think that attitude is endemic across gynaecology - definitely complain Flowers .

This is awful. I have endometriosis and the Mirena, I have always been offered anaesthetic. So sorry you went through all that. Things like this and OP’s hysteroscopy are traumatising.