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AIBU?

To think neighbour's behaviour is a bit odd?

109 replies

Riversidewriter28 · 04/05/2021 18:50

... Or I'm probably just nosy and bored. My neighbours are a couple in their 30s (I'd guess.) I recently found out he's a successful former Intelligence Officer.

They are nice, friendly and helpful, though I can't help but sometimes feel there's something slightly off. They're quite private about their work, which is understandable. They frequently disappear for long periods of time (often weeks or months.) Whenever I speak to them, they often appear like they don't know what the other one is going on about, almost like they don't communicate about anything despite living in the same house (I know this is perfectly possible, though they seem a happy couple, so I don't see any reason why they wouldn't communicate much.)

Anyway, yesterday evening, an old housemate of mine appeared, using her old key to let herself in. Me and my boyfriend had some drinks with her. She's always been fond of the old herb so she was doing that and we were chatting and drinking for a few hours. When we went to bed I'd got five messages from my neighbour that had been deleted. I thought maybe she was complaining about noise but she messaged me back again today asking if we had weed up there and can I hook her up with a dealer Confused I said I don't smoke, but can send her the details of my old housemate. She kept being really eager asking if the girl would be coming back and when.

I'm confused by a couple of things

  1. I'm friendly with my neighbours, but not especially close. Is it a bit weird that she has asked me to put her in touch with a dealer.
  2. Is weed that hard to source in a big city?
  3. She told me that my housemate knows her under a different name. My housemate told me when she first moved in that she has a different name to the one I know her as. Her post etc. all comes under the name I know her as. I was curious about her job, but she doesn't have a LinkedIn profile. They barely ever go out as far as I can tell.

    AIBU to think this is all quite odd?
OP posts:
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Ideasplease322 · 04/05/2021 21:27

Or a low rent version of mr and mrs smith

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NoProblem123 · 04/05/2021 21:29

Your neighbour’s a spy and your ex housemate stinks the col-di-sac out with her spliffs ?
Ok.

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OldLordy · 04/05/2021 21:30

OP have you noticed any of the following at your neighbours' house:

  • black helicopters
  • Tom Cruise
  • a moonraker?


If so you need to go to ground girl. GO TO GROUND.

Also, why is your spy-neighbour calling you by your housebreaking housemate's not-name.
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BobbidyBob · 04/05/2021 21:31

2/10 Biscuit

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LaPampa · 04/05/2021 21:32

Perhaps the weed smoking ex -housemate owes the secret spy neighbour some money and it is thought she might respond to a request to share a dealer but not for a request to pay money. OR. It is a trap. They want to catch the dealer.

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BobbidyBob · 04/05/2021 21:33

@SmileyClare

"MNHQ here, chill mumsnetters we're just taking this down to have a smoke behind the scenes, this thread is whack, man"

PLEASE let it be this!
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ChristMyArse · 04/05/2021 21:34

@OldLordy

OP have you noticed any of the following at your neighbours' house:

  • black helicopters
  • Tom Cruise
  • a moonraker?


If so you need to go to ground girl. GO TO GROUND.

Also, why is your spy-neighbour calling you by your housebreaking housemate's not-name.

Fucking brilliant.
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HollaHolla · 04/05/2021 21:36

Is your neighbour actually Kate Fleming from Line of Duty? She always changes her name when undercover.

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EspressoExpresso · 04/05/2021 21:40

Pretty sure this is OPs neighbour

To think neighbour's behaviour is a bit odd?
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Invisiblewoman1 · 04/05/2021 21:45

This is going in classics for me Grin

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mistermagpie · 04/05/2021 21:47

This is such a funny thread, I'm not sure what people think an Intelligence Officer is in this context, but I work with lots of them and the ones I know are either civilian police staff or desk based police officers. They're not spies or something and it's not a secret job. OPs neighbour might be one of these.

Although probably not because he most likely doesn't exist.

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SmileyClare · 04/05/2021 21:48

I'd trust your instincts op. I mean it's not as if marijuana makes you paranoid or anything.

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SmileyClare · 04/05/2021 21:52

Is your neighbour Kate Fleming?

I don't think it's over dramatic to suspect the neighbour is now referring to you as "X" and possibly has a photo of you blu tacked to her wall which she looks at thoughtfully.

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InThisMultiverse · 04/05/2021 21:52

Did you write the last episode of Line of Duty?

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Onlinedilema · 04/05/2021 22:01

If your neighbour knows your ex flat mate, why doesn’t he/she ask them herself for weed?

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HerRoyalRisesAgain · 04/05/2021 22:02

I don't think it's over dramatic to suspect the neighbour is now referring to you as "X" and possibly has a photo of you blu tacked to her wall which she looks at thoughtfully

With a piece of red string going between OP and the friend with the weed

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SmileyClare · 04/05/2021 22:17

Oh yes the red string. Also lots of frowning and a penchant for polo necks.

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GrannieD · 04/05/2021 22:39

LTB

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Sparklesocks · 04/05/2021 22:45

@Onlinedilema

If your neighbour knows your ex flat mate, why doesn’t he/she ask them herself for weed?

This is true! If they already know each other why would you need to give neighbour your ex housemate’s details re the weed? This story has more holes than a piece of Swiss cheese. Grin
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Weeedonkey · 04/05/2021 22:48

I didn't know she had the key till last night.

😳

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Loyaultemelie · 04/05/2021 22:51

@InThisMultiverse or maybe Bloodlands it was equally poorly written and full of holes

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thelightishere · 04/05/2021 22:55

Brilliant reading Grin

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ToxicNextDoor · 04/05/2021 22:56

It is a bit odd but at the same time I don’t think they’d mix work with pleasure.

Someone I vaguely know is in a similar line of work - it seems to be a very strange existence.

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Riversidewriter28 · 04/05/2021 22:58

Because my housemate only met the neighbour in passing. They weren't keen on each other and never exchanged numbers etc. I've lived here the longest of all of them so I know the neighbours a bit better.

OP posts:
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Postern · 04/05/2021 23:06

Zero marks for plotting and characterisation, OP. But it’s quite funny.

Everyone is now trying to figure out how tiddled Successful Former Intelligence Officer would have had to be to make spellings in five different renditions of ‘Hook me up with your dealer.’

HOOK ME UP WITH YOURE DEALER
HOOOOK MEE UP WITH YIUR DEALER
HOOK ME UPP WITH YURE DEELER
HUKE MEE UP WIT YO DEAL
BOTHER, COULD I HAVE SOME WEED, PLEASE?

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