Page 5 | to think this neighour should not have taken kid's ball

junipertree2 · 2021-05-03T07:58:58+00:00

My sons were playing with a brand new football in our very small back garden yesterday when it bounced over the wall, down a path (our street is on a slope and we are the higher side) and came to rest on the opposite side of the street behind the back wheel of a neighbour's car. (The houses have no fences or gates.) Within about thirty seconds, he had raced out of his house and taken the ball. Needless to say, my son who had just paid £17 for this ball was very upset and annoyed. AIBU to think that this man had no right to do this? He is a middle aged man who doesn't like children playing in front of his house, hates footballs and shouts a lot at boys in the street. But I am on my own and money is very tight.

SpringtimeSummertime · 03/05/2021 11:15

When I was a child, the street was full of children playing - rounders, football, cribby. and coincidentally, half of all children weren't overweight, obese, or hooked on video games. But that's a price worth paying for a quiet street, eh.

Yes, we did too. No cars parked on the street at all. Same street now has cars all the way down both sides. Roads are busier, cars are bigger and faster.
Times change.

Acarerformum · 03/05/2021 11:17

Hi, It might be a good idea, to write a note, saying it’s your son’s ball and you are sorry (shouldn’t have to say sorry) these things happen all the time, when children play with balls! but it might get your ball back, without you having to confront your unreasonable neighbour.

Bluntness100 · 03/05/2021 11:18

Just go and ask for it back and apologise. I can’t believe you won’t.

ChrissyPlummer · 03/05/2021 11:18

I’m glad it’s raining here; there are loads of places round here where kids can play; a large park about 5/10 mins away, every house on this estate has a garden, there are quite a few kids trampoline/gymnastics/footy/cricket/tennis clubs. Instead they play in the road near our house (never near their own is it?).

BalladOfBarryAndFreda · 03/05/2021 11:18

So you haven’t asked for the ball back because the man is mean? Honestly, what an absolute ninny. Either accept the ball is gone and in future take your child to play with their expensive toys in more secure/appropriate areas or go and ask for it back.

junipertree2 · 03/05/2021 11:21

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PattyPan · 03/05/2021 11:21

I voted yabu for not asking for the ball back. Send your son over to get it!

Sparklfairy · 03/05/2021 11:23

@junipertree2

I did not ask for it back as he is unpleasant to children (not just mine) and I don't want to be yelled at or abused, thanks.

A very sad day when two kids can't play with a ball in their own garden without having it taken by a grouch.

When I was a child, the street was full of children playing - rounders, football, cribby. and coincidentally, half of all children weren't overweight, obese, or hooked on video games. But that's a price worth paying for a quiet street, eh.

Well if you want it back, you kinda have to go and ask for it tbh. Unless you're expecting him to deliver it to you?

Just apologise, politely ask for it back, and realistically if you've got a neighbour who makes trouble then don't give them any ammo with future stray balls. Play with something else or go to the park.

Notaroadrunner · 03/05/2021 11:23

@junipertree2

I did not ask for it back as he is unpleasant to children (not just mine) and I don't want to be yelled at or abused, thanks.

A very sad day when two kids can't play with a ball in their own garden without having it taken by a grouch.

When I was a child, the street was full of children playing - rounders, football, cribby. and coincidentally, half of all children weren't overweight, obese, or hooked on video games. But that's a price worth paying for a quiet street, eh.

He may not be half as unpleasant if you, an adult, turn up to ask for the ball. Don't be such a wimp and go and get your child's property back. And tell the kids to be more careful. Of course they can play in their garden, the problem is the ball being kicked out of the garden. If a car had been passing when the ball went on the road it could have caused more damage.

Original poster

junipertree2 · 03/05/2021 11:25

@ChrissyPlummer

I’m glad it’s raining here; there are loads of places round here where kids can play; a large park about 5/10 mins away, every house on this estate has a garden, there are quite a few kids trampoline/gymnastics/footy/cricket/tennis clubs. Instead they play in the road near our house (never near their own is it?).

Well, many parents don't like the idea of their kids going too far away, crossing roads etc. If anything bad happened that would be viewed as parental negligence. And if children play ball games in gardens, the ball goes over the fence and you have the same problem.

And haven't kids sports all been suspended? This is part of the problem at the moment.

OP posts:

crosspelican · 03/05/2021 11:25

I think it's utterly bizarre that you prefer to abandon £17 rather than... knock on a person's door and ask for your belongings back.

Do you actually mean that you realistically expect him to shout at you, with a raised voice? And verbally abuse you? Perhaps there is somebody you could go with?

Or is there a backstory with your children causing him trouble before and he has indicated that he is at the end of his tether?

PhilCornwall1 · 03/05/2021 11:25

A very sad day when two kids can't play with a ball in their own garden without having it taken by a grouch.

Very true. I've said to the kids behind us to just come in the garden and get their ball, saves them knocking on the door if it comes in, which isn't often.

It's not as if they're doing it on purpose and kids need to play. I bet half the miserable sods who say they shouldn't be in the street, played in the street when they were kids.

TheWitchCirce · 03/05/2021 11:26

Ask for it back. What message are you giving to your children by not being brave enough to have an adult conversation about it? Apologise - ask for it back.

sunsetsand · 03/05/2021 11:27

Just go and ask for it back. How have you made this about COVID and apparently finding it hard to get on the property ladder?

Honestly, you're being dramatic and hard work. Send the kid round for it if you really don't want to

Roussette · 03/05/2021 11:28

Go and ask for it back, what on earth is the matter with you? It landed on a public road.

And as for this..
Most homeowners now seem 60+....and these are the people are kids have lost a year of their lives to protect

Pahetic.

You obviously hate older people.

Chloemol · 03/05/2021 11:28

Sorry but you, as a parent, are not prepared to ask for a ball back

What a great example you are to your kids them

It’s you that is wasting the £17. Go and get it

Memedru · 03/05/2021 11:28

Love it when people compare childhoods, yes when alot of us was growing up we could play in the street, I could aswell!

My parents for instance moved into there house 15 years ago, maybe 1 or 2 cars in the road, now there is 50+ cars, parked on both sides of the road

Flowers500 · 03/05/2021 11:29

If you’re old enough to have a child then you’re bloody well old enough to go get the ball back, for Christ’s sake!

n00bie · 03/05/2021 11:29

He’s probably waiting for one of the kids or their parents to politely go and ask for it back.

I have 5 balls in my garden that came over on Saturday. I threw the first back, so it was 6 that came over in total in one day. One was with such force that it hit our chicken run and spooked them all. It was lucky that they were in the run and not free ranging, as it could have killed them if it had hit at that speed. The other 5 were more gentle, but still frightened the chickens after the full force ball had them already on edge. I’m sick of throwing them back and worried about potential harm they could cause, so I’m waiting for them to come round and collect so that I can talk to them about it. If they haven’t come round by tomorrow, I’ll be going there myself to to return them and I doubt I’ll be as friendly, but I’m giving them the chance to do the right thing and come and apologise first. I have no problem with kids having fun in their own garden, but why should my pets and property be at risk because of that? Your neighbour has a right to be annoyed, as at £17, I’m guessing this is a good quality football and probably pretty heavy.

Roussette · 03/05/2021 11:31

But it landed in the road!

It didn't land in the neighbour's garden.

Tsubasa1 · 03/05/2021 11:33

Yanbu, my sympathies OP. I would go and ask for the ball back. Turn the video of your phone on first, then any abuse he shouts at you can be on camera. Then at least you can threaten him with something if he doesn't give it back/is abusive.

NoProblem123 · 03/05/2021 11:33

You need to go and ask for it back, apologise, and not let them play with the a £17 (heavy) football in your tiny garden again.

They clearly can’t control it, you’re on a hill, it will happen again. He doesn’t want it near his car.
Take them to a green space so they can play with it properly.

This is coming from someone who throws 7 to 10 small/light balls back to neighbour’s kids practically every day only for them to come straight back over and I’m sick if it.

steff13 · 03/05/2021 11:38

But it landed in the road!

I don't actually think that's clear. She said it was across the road, behind his car. His car could have been in his driveway. She didn't say the car was parked in the street.

How old are the kids?

Foxglovesandlilacs · 03/05/2021 11:38

Oh god what a drama about nothing. Go and ask for it back.

Darkstar4855 · 03/05/2021 11:38

YABU not to ask for it back. He’s just going to keep doing it if he gets away with it.

Also what do you mean your kids can’t go to the park because they have to cross the road? Why can’t you go with them? Let them have a good kick around with the ball and then they can play something else in the garden when they get home.