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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to have hairy legs this summer?

212 replies

Franklyfrost · 27/04/2021 14:37

I’m busy and don’t want to shave or wax my legs this summer but I do want to wear floaty dresses, short shorts and sparkly sandals.

My legs aren’t very hairy, just long thin patchy mangey hair from below knee an ankle. It would look better if I had a luscious thick black pelt.

Should I sod it and keep the hair or would it turn your stomach? I don’t want to scare small children or have people think I’m unkempt or dirty. But also I don’t want to act as if I’m ashamed of my leg hair (even if I am).

OP posts:
PerspicaciousGreen · 28/04/2021 19:12

I haven't shaved anything for the best part of a decade. I wander round in dresses and shorts with bare legs all summer. No one has ever mentioned it and I'm not aware of ever having had any "looks". And if I did... so what? It's not a health or cleanliness issue, it's just the current fashion. I think of it as the equivalent of wearing flares when skinny jeans are in.

I don't really ever wear clothes you'd be able to see my pits in, so I don't know if many people realise. But that's just because I like the feel of sleeves on my arms, not because I'm horrendously embarrassed.

Go for it, OP! Be free!

PerspicaciousGreen · 28/04/2021 19:16

I have, however, recently stood in front of a mirror stroking my darkening pregnancy tache and wondering where my personal limit is...

Maggiesfarm · 28/04/2021 19:30

I don't see what misogyny has to do with it, I think it feels and looks nice to have smooth legs and armpits. I always did and never hated my body at all. It doesn't take long to shave legs and pits.

countrypunk · 28/04/2021 19:46

@PerspicaciousGreen

I have, however, recently stood in front of a mirror stroking my darkening pregnancy tache and wondering where my personal limit is...
Lol
PerspicaciousGreen · 28/04/2021 19:47

@Maggiesfarm

I don't see what misogyny has to do with it, I think it feels and looks nice to have smooth legs and armpits. I always did and never hated my body at all. It doesn't take long to shave legs and pits.
Thing is, it is just an aesthetic thing but people try to make it a universal edict. I see people wearing clothes in the street that I wouldn't be seen dead in that I think make them look hideous. They obviously like them. Some people have Kim Kardashian as their fashion idol, some people have the M&S catalogue. But you rarely hear people say that all women should wear gold hot pants/twin sets and pearls the way they decree that all women should shave because it looks better.
countrypunk · 28/04/2021 19:48

@Maggiesfarm

I don't see what misogyny has to do with it, I think it feels and looks nice to have smooth legs and armpits. I always did and never hated my body at all. It doesn't take long to shave legs and pits.
Ever wondered why you think that? Does this view just extend to women or do you prefer men to keep their legs smooth too?
bridgetreilly · 28/04/2021 19:49

I wouldn’t say I never shave, but since I stopped doing it regularly, I’ve never regretted it. I have hairy armpits too.

AnExcellentWalker · 28/04/2021 19:57

I haven't shaved my legs at all in at least 2 years (including the last 2 summers - so it's more than 2 years actually). I don't wear shorts, because I don't want to burn, but I do wear floaty dresses that don't always come right to my toes. If people want to look at My Hairy Legs, & be shocked, that's their choice. My DH is fully supportive of my decision not to defoliate (if he wasn't, I'd be highly critical of his beard!)

Bollocks to what other people think.

AnExcellentWalker · 28/04/2021 20:00

Oh, and I am Hairy. Like a fucking gorilla. Thick black leg hair. No delicate lady hair here.

Maggiesfarm · 28/04/2021 20:10

countrypunk:

Ever wondered why you think that? Does this view just extend to women or do you prefer men to keep their legs smooth too?
......
I know it is fashionable for men to be clean shaven all over now. I prefer my man to be hairy so is that misogyny in reverse? I don't like beards though, they can look nice enough on some men but I think they are unhygienic and prefer a smooth face.

5128gap · 28/04/2021 20:34

If I noticed in a swimming pool say, with no other indication, from clothing etc, this is what I would think:
That it looked unpleasant (because I've had 5 decades of conditioning to think this)
That either you were a person who didn't 'look after herself' (because I'm conditioned to view leg shaving as basic hygiene for women)
Or that you were making a statement and might have very strong feminist principles (and so might judge me for my internalised misogynistic approach to female grooming)
Not even attempting to defend the indefensible, but you wanted to know what people might think, and thats my honest response.

Mandalay246 · 29/04/2021 10:02

Is that not normal? It’s not just two minutes once, it’s lots of two minutes. And I work/study/have kids/no childcare/no cleaner/partner is... oh that’s another story. But spare time is so precious and I don’t want to add any more chores to the list. Even two minute ones.

But the point is that you are already in the bath/shower so you do it while you are there - it takes less time than washing my hair and I only do it twice a week in summer and once a week in winter, that's not a lot of two minutes.

Whether women want to partake in the ritual of shaving their legs or not, I really don't think this needs to be framed as a burden society expects of women

I totally agree with this comment. I can't see how it is any different to putting on make-up, or lipstick, or wearing clothes which make you feel good. I like the feel of hair-free legs, especially in summer, but I certainly don't feel it is "expected", nor do I go around looking at other women's legs to see what they do.

countrypunk · 29/04/2021 10:31

@5128gap

If I noticed in a swimming pool say, with no other indication, from clothing etc, this is what I would think: That it looked unpleasant (because I've had 5 decades of conditioning to think this) That either you were a person who didn't 'look after herself' (because I'm conditioned to view leg shaving as basic hygiene for women) Or that you were making a statement and might have very strong feminist principles (and so might judge me for my internalised misogynistic approach to female grooming) Not even attempting to defend the indefensible, but you wanted to know what people might think, and thats my honest response.
I think this is a really honest comment and most if not all of us can relate to these feelings. And it's absolute bullshit. The hair stuff is just another way in which society polices women's bodies. And yeah, most of us do it - but we can at least be alive to why we're doing it. We're not born thinking the hair on our legs is disgusting.
CounsellorTroi · 29/04/2021 10:34

That either you were a person who didn't 'look after herself' (because I'm conditioned to view leg shaving as basic hygiene for women)

Leg shaving has nothing to do with hygiene.

XenoBitch · 29/04/2021 10:54

You do you, OP. Go rock those skirts, shorts, and give no fucks to what the pearl clutchers think.
I wish I had the confidence to get my legs out. I live in leggings even in the height of summer (scars from self harm).

itssquidstella · 29/04/2021 11:03

@CounsellorTroi no it doesn't, you're right, but the point @5128gap is making is that we've been conditioned by society to associate grooming procedures such as shaving with hygiene. It's the stereotype of the unwashed hippy/hairy-legged feminist.

Branleuse · 29/04/2021 11:24

I think body hair on women is much like the grey hair movement or the bearded men. If someone looks like they are hairy and wear scruffy clothes and dont do their hair, then that doesnt give off the same aesthetic as someone who is wearing nice clothes and looks clean and like they take care, but dont want to shave.
Same as someone having grey hair, but wears nice clothes and makeup, is a different aesthetic to someone that just doesnt care, or a man with a nice groomed beard and hair, doesnt look the same as a bloke that looks scruffy and like he probably stinks.

Its up to the individual what they do, but obviously things like personal grooming is something that people notice and have their own opinions on. I cant imagine people looking at Sophia Lorens hairy armpits and thinking they looked disgusting, and some nice looking bloke with a groomed beard doesnt look the same as Brian Blessed.

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 29/04/2021 12:34

@CounsellorTroi

That either you were a person who didn't 'look after herself' (because I'm conditioned to view leg shaving as basic hygiene for women)

Leg shaving has nothing to do with hygiene.

That doesn't stop people / some women from calling it dirty.
Allwokedup · 29/04/2021 12:35

I hate seeing hairy armpits on men or women, or legs really. That’s my issue though. It’s up to you what you do.

Viviennemary · 29/04/2021 12:55

I hate armpit hair and think it is gross on women and men. And I don't like facial hair on men either. Hairy legs with a skirt. Shock. Armpit hair is the worst. Its vile.

Weeedonkey · 29/04/2021 13:02

@Viviennemary

I hate armpit hair and think it is gross on women and men. And I don't like facial hair on men either. Hairy legs with a skirt. Shock. Armpit hair is the worst. Its vile.
I’m the same. Hairy legs, whatever, but hairy armpits … 🤮 I think men’s look worse because they look like pubes (a bit like beards really, face pubes).
Mylittlepony374 · 29/04/2021 13:04

I don't shave. I get lots of looks if I wear a skirt/ at my underarms in the swimming pool etc. I don't care. Bizarrely any discomfort I've ever felt was on my husbands behalf - worrying what people would think of his hairy wife-even though I know he doesn't care at all. So that was weird for me.

NeedNewKnees · 29/04/2021 13:10

The amount of internalised misogyny on this is staggering.

OP, give it a go.
If it feels fine, great! Another pointless “grooming” chose disposed of.
If you feel uncomfortable, no worries, shave your legs that week. It’s not a tattoo, you’re not making a lifetime commitment to a look.

We’re more accustomed to shaved legs and armpits on women, but it’s not compulsory. I’ll do it a few times a year and otherwise not bother, depending on my mood.

KihoBebiluPute · 29/04/2021 13:12

People being grossed-out by hairy legs (or any other non-head hair) on women is part of an unconscious and internalised misogyny that the perpetrators are completely unconscious of and would vehemently deny (and I am sure will do so) but such denials don't stop it being true. The adult human female body has hair on legs, under arms and at the groin and letting it grow there is no more gross or unhygenic than a man having a beard or moustache. However, centuries of cultural misogyny dictate that the female adult form is more attractive with a pre-puberty lack of hair in these places - something that even suggests an endemic cultural tendency towards paedophilia.

I agree with "be the change you want to see" and I will also be letting hair grow wherever it does so naturally with no shame whatsoever. If someone is repulsed by that it says a lot more about them than about you or I.

countrypunk · 29/04/2021 13:18

@KihoBebiluPute

People being grossed-out by hairy legs (or any other non-head hair) on women is part of an unconscious and internalised misogyny that the perpetrators are completely unconscious of and would vehemently deny (and I am sure will do so) but such denials don't stop it being true. The adult human female body has hair on legs, under arms and at the groin and letting it grow there is no more gross or unhygenic than a man having a beard or moustache. However, centuries of cultural misogyny dictate that the female adult form is more attractive with a pre-puberty lack of hair in these places - something that even suggests an endemic cultural tendency towards paedophilia.

I agree with "be the change you want to see" and I will also be letting hair grow wherever it does so naturally with no shame whatsoever. If someone is repulsed by that it says a lot more about them than about you or I.

Yup, 💯 this.