To find over parenting and shrill children annoying?

[hoorayforhamsters]

I do accept I have to suck it up and get on with it, but does anyone else find parents being cloyingly attentive and over effusive annoying? I have three sides of our garden occupied with just such parenting. Every breath seems to be the most amazing thing ever done by a child ever. And they are soooooo shrill!

I've got a family over the back to me and the performance parenting gets right on my nerves . The girl is always screaming and shouting and the mam is always trying to pacify her in a shrill voice . 'What is the matter darling are you sad' the little girl screamed 'I'm not sad I'm very angry ' ffs ! I have 3 of my own youngest is the same age and does not go on like this as I won't allow it .

I know what you mean OP! When the parent's effusive shrills are worse than the kids shouting you have a problem!

@Daphnise

I cannot see the point of anxious over-parenting, and dislike the products of such people.

The products of such people????? Do you mean children? That’s a lovely way to refer to a child.

The nastiness and superiority on this thread to children and other parents is shocking. Starting to think the term “performance parent” says way more about the person using it in a derogatory manner than it does about the subject of the slur.

Can't believe people have a problem with parents praising they're kids. Don't get it. Also when you're a parent mundane stuff is exciting. Potty training, drawing, child first time doing X.

I understand shouting praises to children for the benefit of an audience and trying to show off ect
But most of what's been said on here is ppl just interacting and praising with their children. To me it's completely normal to encourage and praise small children even for the smallest thing. You don't know what goes on behind closed doors, what could seem over the top and insignificant to you. Could be something of a milestone for the child.
Unless someone is verbally, physically abusive or neglectful to their children you have no right to judge how someone parents.

I talk to my ds the way some of you are describing it isn’t for other people he is autistic and has speech and understanding delays. I’m trying to speak clearly to him and use describing words to encourage speech development. Can’t believe people actually overhear parents talking to and praising their children and think it’s just because they’re listening, that is some self centred s#!*.

The high pitched way of talking is actually called Parentese and is proven by research to help children learn. It comes naturally and is a product of evolution.

Be grateful there's a fence between you.

My sister is just like that with my nephew.

And I am sharing a space and listening to it (luckily only at family events or I think I'd have lived with ear plugs!)

I've never understood how children can be the best 2yo to use cutlery, soooooo clever for answering a simple question (aged 6 and it was what they wanted to drink) etc etc.

But if anyone actually pays attention to what he's good at and shows an interest she won't let him engage in the conversation as she doesn't think it's appropriate and doesn't want people to think he's bragging

The most annoying one for me is that when she's tell him something and he doesn't listen and does what he wants anyway she tell us how he's so independent and funny for 9.

No love - he's a little fecker!

Oh for goodness sake. At least these kids have positive parents who want to engage with them. If it’s a bit annoying to other people, then that’s not the end of the world. At least the over enthusiastic dad at soft play was enjoying time with his daughter. For all we know, he might be a non resident parent and only see her once a fortnight . Who knows?
OP, pretty soon the weather will turn to shite again and these annoying buggers will be back inside

I’m finding this thread really sad.

I have three children, I praise them a lot! I love playing with them. I tell them they’re beautiful and I tell them I’m proud of them all the time. I grew up in the late 70’s/80’s with a friend whose dad beat her with a belt when she ‘stepped out of line’ and locked her in the house during school holidays Another lad whose dad beat him, his brother and mum so badly he put them all in hospital at different times. I’d rather listen to over zealous parenting than watch the trauma resulting from atrocious parenting any day.

The high pitched way of talking is actually called Parentese and is proven by research to help children learn. It comes naturally and is a product of evolution.

This. It’s just parents engaging normally and positively with their kids and praising small milestones and achievements. Nothing performance related about it. I’m probably guilty of doing it myself, and I couldn’t care less about potentially annoying the neighbours while we’re playing with DD in the garden (luckily we have nice, non-judgemental neighbours, mostly of whom also have small kids).

As a former primary teacher and current education professional, it’s the precise opposite of this parenting style that’s by far the bigger problem - kids beginning formal education barely able to formulate a full sentence because parents are disengaged, glued to their phones and barely interacting with them other than to occasionally bark orders.

I really hope most of those sneering and complaining on this thread don’t have children, as you clearly don’t like them very much.

@Jazzy1814 same here 3yo pretty much non verbal possible asd.
I narrate everything in short sentences that I repeat. I appreciate I sound like an awful gobshite but I don't care if it helps in anyway.

I have an autistic 10 year old, which means sometimes you will find me in the playground telling her how amazing it is that she's swinging so high. Her need for reassurance and engagement is far more important than my discomfort at the looks I get.

I think I get the general feeling. I totally understand why people would imagine I'm so mean to feel like this. In contrast, there is much squealing, loud shouting and general enjoyment coming from various local gardens today and I'm thoroughly enjoying it. I guess everyone has their sound that sets them off. It's not altogether rational, is it?
Of course people should parent in whatever way they like/can or gets them through to bedtime. And I don't doubt I annoyed people with my kids or parenting style sometimes. Maybe I should have spent less time worrying about the neighbours.