@Subbaxeo
Re allergies, are people really allergic to vegetables? I take it there will be a choice so people can avoid things which may upset them-and say they have special dietary requirements re gluten-as they would at a non vegan event. Dairy and shellfish tend to be the main culprits which obviously won’t be on the menu. But seriously, people need to get a grip. Do people really attend weddings as some kind of return on the money they’ve shelled out? I’ve attended weddings where the food wasn’t great but enjoyed the day regardless as it’s great to see people you love being happy.
I can't eat onion or garlic. It's a nightmare for all cuisines! But if people are allergic to something, they should
say when they RSVP like at any wedding. Then the caterers can make sure they have a meal they can eat. Some caterers are really shitty about it and give you basically a lettuce leaf and a tinned fruit salad, but most are great and I've had some lovely stuff which was just a bit different from what everyone else was having.
I know someone who's allergic to all fruit except bananas! But again, she'd just say on the RSVP and the caterers would sort it out.
Even at a buffet, all dishes can be labelled with full ingredients and if cross-contamination is a problem, caterers can plate the allergic person a separate individual meal. If I hired caterers, asking them what they do about allergies would be high on my list, to make sure I got one of the good companies who thinks it's their job to feed everyone and not just throw some random food out and call it a day. So the "I can't eat this common vegan ingredient" people are just being ridiculous because you'd just say on the RSVP and something you can eat would be provided.
My biggest tip for allergy catering is to get the caterers to bring out the special plates FIRST then fill in the regular meals around them. Stops me having to ask the server who has no idea if it's OK for me to eat and wondering whether I should accept it and possibly not get the meal that was intended for me or refuse it and possibly get nothing!
It seems like there's a huge cultural difference when it comes to weddings as to whether it's the couple's big day and they should do things the way they want, or whether the couple are the hosts and should be making sure their guests enjoy themselves. Obviously the right answer is both, but people tend to come down on one side or the other and I think that's where the problem is. Are you attending a wedding to be a hosted guest or to cheer the couple on from the sidelines?
To be honest, I find traditional wedding food (plated roast kind of thing - especially as I can't have any sauces/gravy because they have onion in them!) minging and I'd never eat it at home or choose it in a restaurant, but I'm in the "the couple has kindly invited me to share this special moment as a token of our friendship" camp so I eat what I'd like to and leave the rest and don't complain. I do love it when they send out the menu beforehand, though (usually along with parking instructions etc a short while before the day).