To only serve vegan food at my wedding.

[inthewest]

My partner and myself are both vegan. We want to serve an only vegan menu from an excellent vegan caterer. I know people aren't a fan of "fake meat" and we've deliberately chosen to not have anything of that sort. Our menu will include many options and will cater to allergies and dietary needs such as celiac. The food is delicious, is very "us" and reflects us as couple.

We have had pushback from my partners family. Adult family. I'm fully prepared to cater for children but not adults. Our thinking is that it's one meal.

I think lots of people would find it harder not to have any milk products, including milk in coffee, cheese

Well best to stay away from cheese entirely, because vegan substitutes aren’t great. However I don’t see a huge issue with that, I eat many meals without cheese.

As for milk, there are so many different substitutes out there now and they’re so widely available that I don’t get the angst. I’m sure people can be flexible for one meal. I have oatmilk in cereal myself as I genuinely prefer it, though I am a committed dairy consumer.

@itssquidstella

I don't think it's at all unreasonable. Some guests might not enjoy what's on offer, though: I can't eat beans or pulses, which feature heavily in a lot of vegan recipes. I am predominantly vegetarian and make plenty of vegan recipes at home, so I have no objection to vegan food on principle, but my heart sinks a bit at the sight of a vegan menu because it's so difficult to avoid the Dreaded Bean.

So you’d specify “no beans” when asked for dietary requirements.

@ConstantlyChanging
Then cook vegan food that isn’t “pretending” it’s got butter in it. Vegan food isn’t a particular taste of set of ingredients it just means minus a dozen or so ingreidents. There are still 10,000 ingredients you can use. I’m not vegan btw - I just avoid red meat. But I do eat vegan meals perhaps a couple of times a week. It’s just normal tasty and healthy food - it can be bland, spicy, hot, salty, “creamy”, or anything else. It’s just food.

Of course!!! I'm not vegan but vegan food is delicious. Much healthier than those takeaway vans some people hire for weddings.

But it sounds like that wouldn’t be an option as I’d have a plate of vegan crap to plough through

Gosh. Enlightened.

I don’t know why you’re assuming there won’t be carbs. They also fall under your charming term ‘vegan crap’.

Honestly couldn’t care less what people think. Being hungry at Christmas cos the food is gross is miserable. I imagine it would be the same at a wedding. Hopefully pre warning the guests will mean they can plan around it. Maybe biscuits in the handbag.

@ConstantlyChanging

Honestly couldn’t care less what people think. Being hungry at Christmas cos the food is gross is miserable. I imagine it would be the same at a wedding. Hopefully pre warning the guests will mean they can plan around it. Maybe biscuits in the handbag.

Well I think it's clear you don't care what other people think. I assume you didn't go round for dinner again?

It's your day and your choice.
However, I always think it's nice to cater for your guests, not just for you.
Otherwise you might as well just go for a vegan meal with your dh.

It's fine as long as you don't mind if your guests go elsewhere to eat. I've seen this and it was fine, those wanting to went to the local pub and went back later.

@ConstantlyChanging
Honestly couldn’t care less what people think. Being hungry at Christmas cos the food is gross is miserable. I imagine it would be the same at a wedding

Learn to cook 😀

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

Do people really still eat meat everyday?

Not meat no, but absolutely my day would feature one of dairy, eggs, fish or meat in almost everything.

Yes me too.

It's not that I've never eaten a meal without meat. But they aren't my favourite meals no. And the times I've had meals, at restaurants or events which have been specifically vegetarian or vegan, I haven't enjoyed them.

People using things like 'so you've never had beans on toast without butter or a plate of chips?' well yes obviously I have, but I wouldn't particularly be buzzing with anticipation at the thought of it either so what's your point?

I've said I would go but I wouldn't particularly be looking forward to the food and that I'd be happy to have my opinion changed if it turned out to be tasty, what's wrong with that?

@ConstantlyChanging

Well have some chips, bread or pasta along with them then. Honestly, my six year old sounds more mature than a lot of commentary on this thread.

I’d happily do that. But it sounds like that wouldn’t be an option as I’d have a plate of vegan crap to plough through. But anyway I did say their wedding their choice. Just that they must understand the some people like me (whatever you think of me) will hate it.

I suspect you have more issues with your sister than you do with food...

@Alaimo

Husband and I are vegetarians. We did serve meat at our wedding but if I'd do it again i would make it 100% veggie. I was worried about what the meat eaters would think but in the end most people tried some of the veggie dishes as well (it was a buffet) and said it was delicious.

If you do want to placate the meat eaters, what we've been trialling at work events is to make all catering vegetarian/vegan by default, but meat eaters can request meat under the 'dietary requirements' options. It's surprising how few people request meat when they have to opt in, rather than have it as the default option.

Your work is wonderful. What a clever solution! Do you know off the top of your head what % of the workforce are obligate carnivores?

Well I think it's clear you don't care what other people think. I assume you didn't go round for dinner again?

Haven’t spent a Christmas with her since and nor have our parents. 🤣

They come to mine instead. I cook really well. Without massively limiting the ingredients. Soz angry vegans of mumsnet!

But they aren't my favourite meals no.

Do people always expect to be served their favourite meals at other people’s weddings?

I love meat. But I would happily eat a vegan meal. I even cook them sometimes - veg curry, bean chilli etc. All very nice. And for one or even two meals it wouldn't bother me at all.

Make sure there's plenty of bread rolls and loads of chips - those that can't eat any of the other vegan food at least can have a chip butty and won't go to bed 'crying of hunger.'!!!

Cannot believe some of the comments on here. God forbid any of those who won't eat vegan food ever experience real hunger.

If I was invited I'd still go but I'd keep a sandwich in my car in case their was nothing I liked. DH is veggie and I'm not keen on many of his food tbh. I don't like spicy food and allergic to mushrooms. I don't like many vegetables except peas and carrots. What is the menu?

@Devlesko
It’s just a weird mentality. Would you insult Jewish, Indian, Chinese guests this way. Or any other guest serving a cuisine/ingredients that you’re not a massive fan of (that is in fact just decent healthy food)? Or would you just put on your big boy/girl shoes and eat it up like a real grown up?

[quote supermoonrising]@WeAllHaveWings
I've never had vegan meal I've enjoyed.
Perhaps you could try to learn to cook?[/quote]
@supermoonrising

Perhaps you could try to learn not to be a passive aggressive arse?

Soz angry vegans of mumsnet!

I don’t know why you’re assuming we’re all vegan. I fucking love meat and dairy. I can, however, cope with and enjoy entire meals without them.

*I mean insult hosts (not guests)

@ConstantlyChanging

Well I think it's clear you don't care what other people think. I assume you didn't go round for dinner again?

Haven’t spent a Christmas with her since and nor have our parents. 🤣

They come to mine instead. I cook really well. Without massively limiting the ingredients. Soz angry vegans of mumsnet!

Yep, thought so. Imagine ostracising a family member at Christmas because they once cooked you food you didn’t like.

As a previous poster mentioned, a lot of people struggle with vegan food as beans/pulses cause intolerance in many. Also the fact that people would struggle without dairy milk in their tea, coffee... You are super lucky if your body tolerates soy milk or other vegan "milks", i've thrown up with all of them!

Vegan food doesn’t need to contain soya

I’m sure if people don’t like soya/almond/coconut milk in their tea or coffee they can drink it black or drink something else

Some dishes:
Potato salad
Numerous salads with different dressing
Couscous with roasted vegetables
Vegetable curry - aloo gobi, saag aloo, chana masala,
Lentil curry
Lots of Middle Eastern dishes french beans with chilli and garlic, rice with spinach and chick peas
Plain rice
Rice with spices and nuts
Ratatouille
Pastries with various vegetable fillings

Lots of delicious puddings/cakes made with almond flour

You really wouldn’t cope with any of the above for one meal

Not meat no, but absolutely my day would feature one of dairy, eggs, fish or meat in almost everything.

Yes me too.

It's not that I've never eaten a meal without meat. But they aren't my favourite meals no. And the times I've had meals, at restaurants or events which have been specifically vegetarian or vegan, I haven't enjoyed them.

People using things like 'so you've never had beans on toast without butter or a plate of chips?' well yes obviously I have, but I wouldn't particularly be buzzing with anticipation at the thought of it either so what's your point?

Every word of this.

Serve up your restrictive diet to your guests if you like but don’t explode with self righteous horror like some on this thread if they find it a bit grim.