Nicknames for the neighbours

[FrankButchersDickieBow]

Are we being unreasonable for not knowing our neighbours real names and have nicknames for them instead?

We have Mr P - Mr perfect, you know the type, wears his charity t-shirt going for his jog, reels his washing line in when the clothes are dried, wears tartan for golfing etc.

Onslo and Daisy, argue on the street, loves a velor tracksuit,

The horse whisperer - walks bandy legged, obsessed with horses, has it on their letterbox

The Young Ones - only young couple who live in the street and always have people round

The Exhibitionist-loves to get out the shower and trot round naked in his room after a shower

Batty old art teacher - curly hair, does yoga, smokes weed

Shagarada - heard her shagging one night whilst we were in the garden, she had her windows open.

My name, is Michael Caine, and I am a nosey neighbour

Anyone else use nicknames?

Oh and ‘Gingernut’ and ‘Veronica Lake’ (young lad with long blonde hair)

@beccy in Scotland yeah?! I have this too...I quote "it's looking out of them"

My mum used to do this, we grew up along "happy gums" (full dentures in her thirties), "yoyo knickers" (self explainable) and "Nova face" (drove a Nova) amongst others

The Croods

We have

Fruit n Veg/Bob from Teachers - has a fruit and veg stall and looks like Bob from Teachers. Swears like him too.
Mr Toot - forever got his drug dealer turning up and blocking the road with his car while they do the deal.
Common Nan - this is a mean one, she’s actually very kind to her numerous grandchildren.
M - nosey neighbour who always lets slip she know about something we’ve been doing that she could only have known if she had us under almost constant surveillance (which, clearly, she does)
Kim Wild - looks like her circa 1983
Stargazer - has a habit of always looking up. Probably need his varifocals adjusting.
The Dog Shit Man - top of my list of suspects of who it is who repeatedly lets their obviously large dog crap lavishly up and down our street on a nightly basis and consistently fails to pick it up.
Mr Mullet - young estate agent, who’s recently grown a moustache and mullet. Apparently unironically. A source of much fascination, I swear he’s been teleported in from 1986.

I expect my neighbours call me Mrs Messy or the Sweary One.

Bully boy next door is affectionately known as “areshole” also guy across the road who used to watch us until I started snapping pics of him doing so is “weirdo”

Sticko, Psycho, Hippies, Toad of Toad Hall and "that woman who are her dogs".

*ate

Colditz - house has a very high fence and lots of security features and could not be penetrated by anyone.

That oddball up’t top - the bloke at the top of the street who has a green coat and is very odd.

Bloody Linda - my dads next door neighbour. Knows all the gossip, has got her nose into everything.

In our old house we used to have two neighbours who were called Fred, we nicknamed one mad Fred because he was quite quirky.. All good until one day I called him mad Fred to his face by accident!!

Particularly like trunchball and topknot wanker 😆

On a more serious note, apart from arsehole next door and weirdo, for the rest we tend to just use their actual names

Love these - I do wonder what ours are though!

We have - 'the old couple' cos they are the oldest in street

Caravan Man - has a caravan

Creepy her or creepy him - cos they are both creepy

New couple - moved in a year ago

We have:
(name of current footballer manager. Too outing)
Ninjamum (because I saw her actually ninja kick her OH in the head once)
Full kit wanker
Big gob
Misery
Beakhead
Johnny one song

Oops, he's not actually a football manager. He's a window cleaner. He just looks like a particular one.

To bee fair I've lived in the same house for 10 years and not only have no idea of my neighbours actual names, I also don't pay enough attention to them enough to make nicknames up 😂
They might have some for me as I'm aware I look like a right misery (resting bitch face) hardly leave the house and pretty much keep to my self, I do know of one who calls me "that weirdo" 😂.

I didn't realise this was a thing but we have nn for all our neighbours apart from our immediate ones who are totally lovely.

The Kids - directly opposite. Lovely family, kids are very loud and screamy. Makes me glad to have teenagers.

Bins - two doors up had a go at me years back for accidentally taking her bin instead of mine. Told me to not touch her bin ever again. Have never taken a parcel in for her in return.

"Steve"Alert - (not his real name) - Steve lives next door to The Kids with his wife and is incredibly nosey. Once you make eye contact with him he will talk to you for ages and you can't get away. We see him coming and say "Steve Alert" and dash in the house.

New ones next door - other side to us moved in 6 years ago, don't know their names. They move out in June so the name will stick for the actual new neighbours.

We had Mr and Mrs Oik, and their little oiks, v. shouty and generally unpleasant, the drug dealers cos their kids smoked weed with the windows open thinking nobody would ever know, the old lady who lived in a shoe cos she had loads of kids.

We also used to live next to Mrs screech, named for obvious reasons

Nice family with the polite kids
The serial killer-he takes 10+ binbags out at 3am the night before bin day, using everyone else's bins. Later discovered he has a takeaway business from home. (Maybe we are "the curtain twitchers")
Potpourri lady

We know most names now but definitely had a nn for everyone

We have the following

1. lady and sir burnalot- they set the toaster on fire on two separate occasions.

2. Mr Jangles- Has an old fashioned shop bell on his door.

3. Mrs Drinkwater- denies she us alcoholic and swears all she drinks is water.

4. Norris and Emily- two friends in their seventies that live together.

5. Skank girl and skank boy- leave their dog shit all over the place.

6. Rob Da Bank- the man who I know broke into my house.

7. Stella and Mario - She drinks Stella on the steps he looks lik Super Mario.

We have Mr Upstairs Man who is the bloke that lives in the flat above ours.

We have

The lady with all the kids
The Christians, who play church music with their friends
The mean people, neighbours across the street who talk to everyone but us and we don’t know why

YES!!! OBVS!!! We have old UKIP guy...he puts huge banners up that indicate the whole close makes that...erm...interesting voting choice, and psycho lawn guy who comes out and strokes his front lawn...sadly informing us CARS MUST have driven across it. Doesn't everyone do this with neighbours? Obvs we know a fair few and we just use their real names

Elvis..man with quiff
Indiana Jones...man with hat
Pedo Pete...curtains closed for 20 years
Orgas..ma..tron...Loud cummer
Jesus..wears sandle's alot
Fireman Sam...Fireman

@Fifipop185 we have a steve alert!! I once crouched under my car in the local supermarket car park to avoid him. He walked round and unearthed me. My weird behaviour did not put him off his 47 min chat about trimming bushes.