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to think theres a snobbishness over video gaming?

58 replies

PasstheBucket89 · 18/04/2021 10:38

obviously moderation is key, things like sleep can be badly effected, safeguarding is important in terms of private chats and stuff like that.
But i do think for some people i. e people on the spectrum being able to talk through a headset and play a game without having to navigate body language and eye contact is actually quite beneficial sometimes.
People get heated and rage quit, but people get heated and ragey in football too, all competitive sports.
it can be beneficial in terms of problem solving skills, better than being zoned out in front of the tv.
My dyslexic soon actually came on in terms of reading because he was reading all the time without struggling to read a book making him anxious.
am i alone in thinking that in moderation it can be a force for good especially in a pandemic. x

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

127 votes. Final results.

You are being unreasonable
You are NOT being unreasonable
PasstheBucket89 · 18/04/2021 10:38

*dyslexic son that should say.

OP posts:
Kaleidoscopecascade · 18/04/2021 10:39

Definitely in moderation. I've found my boy's personalities change if they are on it for long periods. I've also noticed a lot more bullying and nastiness from all the boys especially when on a headset. I'm glad summer is coming to get the boys out more.

Whinge · 18/04/2021 10:44

I agree Op and i'm just going to leave this here. Small warning, it's a beautifully emotional read and you may cry.

PasstheBucket89 · 18/04/2021 10:50

moderation definitely, i notice if i don't enforce breaks the mardiness is through the roof.

OP posts:
VegCheeseandCrackers · 18/04/2021 10:50

I'm a 29 year old woman and I love video gaming. I find it extremely helpful if I'm feeling stressed and it helped me find enjoyment out of life again after an absolutely horrific year in my personal life.
I wouldn't judge someone who veges out in front of the TV to relax. At the end of the day we all have our thing that we enjoy.

PasstheBucket89 · 18/04/2021 10:53

oh that was emotional @Whinge Sad

OP posts:
EnterFunnyNameHere · 18/04/2021 10:57

I've never understood the hate either... it always comes from people who don't game themselves and don't know how much gaming has changed since long!

I love gaming, I also love reading, crafting, gardening, walking.... I don't see gaming as being any more or less beneficial than the others!

Whinge · 18/04/2021 10:59


oh that was emotional *@Whinge* Sad

Yes it was. It's been about 4 - 5 years since I first read the story and even now it sticks with me. It shows a different side of gaming, and how important it can be to other people.
CornishGem1975 · 18/04/2021 11:10

I think gaming has been an absolute lifeline for the kids over the past year. It's kept them in social contact with their friends. I have no issue with it whatsoever, as long as they come off when I say.

I am also a gamer. Love it, it takes your minds off other things - just like another hobby. Not sure why it's treated like the root of all evil!

HandfulofDust · 18/04/2021 11:10

My eldest has played alot of minecraft with friends over the pandemic. It definitely affects his mood if he plays too much but has benefits too. They collaborate, have to share resources, chat generally. All of that has been great when there's been limited social interaction. I definitely think it can also be a great social outlet for kids who struggle in an unstructured playground.

Creepygnochi · 18/04/2021 11:21

I'm a 52 year old female occassional gamer, in that when a new game comes out I play it for 60 hours straight and then don't touch another game gor 9 months.

Some of my children are gamers, others aren't. Some make money playing on twitch and youtube, some play casually. Dh doesn't really play at all, but I've always played. I hate this idea that video games atw a new invention. They're not. I have a home arcade in my basement to prove that.

Games are great. They can be social or they can be another visual storytelling medium. There are games I've played that have touched me more than movies (latest being little nightmares 2). People who dislike gaming just haven't found the right game yet.

TyneTeas · 18/04/2021 11:25

I think this is the right one, a case study from a recruitment agency about transferable skills and gaming which was quite interesting

Potteringshed · 18/04/2021 11:31

@Whinge - I honestly teared up a little bit reading that article. That is so beautiful. I'm incredibly glad that Mats had that wonderful life in Azeroth.

WellLarDeDar · 18/04/2021 11:36

I love gaming. I game instead of watching TV because I prefer to be actively involved (and I like the stories). I often get restless sitting still watching TV. I've been told to 'get a life' before, normally by people who just sit around watching TV all day and have no other hobbies :/ I always though that was hypocritical because at least if in gaming I'm not just letting the TV do all the work.

Whinge · 18/04/2021 14:28

[quote Potteringshed]@Whinge - I honestly teared up a little bit reading that article. That is so beautiful. I'm incredibly glad that Mats had that wonderful life in Azeroth.[/quote]
I'm so pleased his family shared his experience, and that through gaming he the opportunity to make so many good friends. The part about his character loving to run and run, knowing that wasn't something he himself was able to do, makes me tear up every time.

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 18/04/2021 14:51

It's screen snobbery and a long assault from the media in anything video game related. They have been blamed for anything and everything, including school shootings. The "typical" gamer is portrayed as either a fat, lazy, unaccomplished/waste of space slob living in their mum's (nearly always a single mum) basement or super techy/genius type, but both types very awkward, lacking in social skills,no life etc.

There's never any (mainstream) acknowledgement about very clever puzzle type games, or the bonds that can form,the skills that develop, the amazing storylines, the lifeline that it can be to people(not just teens) that are severely disabled or ill, housebound etc.

As for behaviour, that's a two sided issue.

  1. When in a group, behaviour tends to worsen even in real life. Having too much fun, not wanting to be the first one to leave,showing off for each other, egging each other on etc. How many playdates or parks or school playgrounds have seen less than desirable behaviour? Nearly all of them.

2. Games do provide "happiness " and a buzz to most children just like alcohol,being out with friends,food,chocolate,sex,reading a book etc does for adults. Imagine someone interrupted you every time and decided you've had enough, that's it. It doesn't mean they should be left to manage their screen time themselves,or have no limits, but it does help to remind ourselves as adults where they are coming from. It will be even worse for kids that have limited social lives and interaction.

There will obviously be exceptions, but in general that's mostly why people see a change in behaviour with their children when they're gaming.
YellowGlasses · 18/04/2021 14:53

I don’t see the difference in socialising through gaming or by forums like this or other sites like Instagram, Facebook, TikTok etc. Surely for all ages, in moderation, there are lots of benefits.

dreamingbohemian · 18/04/2021 15:02

There's definitely a snobbishness

Somehow it's ok to spend hours on MN or watching TV but gamers are lazy and dumb

marriednotdead · 18/04/2021 15:04

[quote Whinge]I agree Op and i'm just going to leave this here. Small warning, it's a beautifully emotional read and you may cry.[/quote]
I seem to have something in my eye Sad

Whinge · 18/04/2021 15:11

I seem to have something in my eye

Sorry. [socially distanced hug] It's such a lovely story, and really shows the positive side of gaming, especially as the OP mentioned those with additional needs.

marriednotdead · 18/04/2021 15:22

The snobbery is unwarranted and shows a lack of understanding on the part of those judging.
My DS is 24 and autistic. He holds down a full time job, has a girlfriend and a longstanding friendship group. He's also a gamer alongside many of his friends and has been since he was in primary school.
It has meant that at least one part of his life has remained the same throughout the pandemic, which has kept him from sinking deeper into depression. He's adamant he will never stop gaming, it keeps his mind busy but relaxes him at the same time.
Gaming hours are not great for someone with a 9-5 job though, if he could do permanent 2-10 shifts he'd be very happy!

marriednotdead · 18/04/2021 15:22


I seem to have something in my eye

Sorry. [socially distanced hug] It's such a lovely story, and really shows the positive side of gaming, especially as the OP mentioned those with additional needs.

I've sent your link to DS Smile
Whinge · 18/04/2021 15:42

I hope he enjoys it Marriednotdead Smile

Oilpyi · 18/04/2021 15:49

I’ve found the reverse to be honest, maybe we are all just sensitive to the messages that conflict our lifestyle choices.
I’ve been told that by having no gaming devices we restrict our children socially for example, that they won’t be able to relate to their peers or join in conversation. That it’s controlling, over-management or they’ll have skills gaps. Mine though have never been restricted from playing in friend’s consoles or visiting friends lots, but it hasn’t actually panned out to be much of a lure and they drifted from that towards the end of primary. I was the same, occasional player with friends as a teen but I never really got into it.
I don’t hate it, I’m not bothered what their friends do- but for lots of reasons it does t work in my house. I’m though frequently painted as something I’m not because we don’t have a console in the house. (5 kids here with a big age spread, two already grown up- I’m not just a parent of young children).

osbertthesyrianhamster · 18/04/2021 15:51

My son has ASD, OCD and ADHD and gaming is a total no go. He simply cannot control moderation. He becomes addicted and had to go to rehab. He still pesters for games consoles and has meltdowns about them, though.

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