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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Bought a dog - person wants it back..aibu?

459 replies

mrsdaz · 17/04/2021 15:19

I bought a dog 2 days ago from a lovely lady who was finding it hard to manage him due to working full time etc.

Agreed sale on Tuesday, collected him Thursday evening. All well. She has been in touch since by text to see how he is.

Yesterday got a text saying she's missing the dog and would have him back in a heartbeat.

Today I've had a text message from her daughter asking for the dog back. Plus subsequent phone call that I didn't answer.

Aibu to keep the dog? He's so happy and isn't pining for previous home etc. He will be with someone all the time rather than alone all day and has a companion dog here.

Who would give the dog back?

OP posts:
OneTimeAdvocate · 17/04/2021 20:01

Have the dog back, double the price.

Terminallysleepdeprived · 17/04/2021 20:03

@mrsdaz I was coming on here to post a very similar question.

I adopted a dog in December. Have chased and chased to get chip details transferred and previous owner has stalled. Today she asked for pics of dog. I have said not until she updates the chip details as she promised to do 4 months ago. She is now demanding the dog back.

I have messages confirming transfer of ownership and promises to transfer the chip so my solicitor tells me she doesn't have a case but it's really scary to be threatened.

I realised today the previous owner had given me all her vet info and pet passport and when I trawled through it I found the microchip number (my vet is only seeing urgent issues) so have contacted the chip people to transfer ownership myself.

Good luck OP don't let the dog go back if it was being neglected! Our baby is 11 years old and when we first got her she was terrified of everything, men, sudden moves, the lead being held up near her. She literally wet herself when I dropped the end of lead out of my hand and it swung near her head. They had clearly abused her, when they brought her here the woman let her kid stamp on her feet, pull her tail...it was a bloody miracle that she hadn't turned on the kid. I had to pull the kid up gently that it wasn't a very kind thing to do and the woman just laughed and let her continue. No way in hell I am letting her go back

Singlenotsingle · 17/04/2021 20:05

No I wouldn't give him back . You bought him fair and square and you're under no legal obligation to give him back.

HTH1 · 17/04/2021 20:06

Absolutely wouldn’t give him back to this irresponsible owner but as PPs have said, it’s really important that you get his chip updated with your details straight away if not already done.

Dalamalama · 17/04/2021 20:08

My cousin sold her dog than realised she and her son missed him massively. She genuinely loves him but was finding him such had work.

He was returned and is very much loved and cared for. I'm not sure what I'd do in your situation? Perhaps have a chat with them.

Twospaniels · 17/04/2021 20:13

Are you sure this isn’t a stolen dog that they have sold on pretending it was theirs?

Don’t give hime back to them though.

mermaidsariel · 17/04/2021 20:19

I responded to an ad recently advertising a dog very cheaply. There were few details. The response I got was ‘how much are you willing to pay’. I didn’t answer as I suspected the dog was stolen.

Handsoffstrikesagain · 17/04/2021 20:19

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

GreyhoundG1rl · 17/04/2021 20:20

@Dalamalama

My cousin sold her dog than realised she and her son missed him massively. She genuinely loves him but was finding him such had work.

He was returned and is very much loved and cared for. I'm not sure what I'd do in your situation? Perhaps have a chat with them.

The person she sold him to actually returned him? Confused Poor animal, shunted around between halfwits who don't know their own minds Angry
GettingItOutThere · 17/04/2021 20:31

keep the dog!!

shes been offered more money for him. thats so sad

hope he has a lovely life with you!! im sure he will !

Crazybunnylady123 · 17/04/2021 20:33

It’s your dog, change the microchip details and block previous owner.

BillyTodd · 17/04/2021 20:33

the microchip company will contact the people who are already registered on the chip to confirm that the transfer of ownership is legitimate. I had a not dissimilar situation myself with a rescued dog a few years ago.

Your best bet IMO is to play nicey nicey with the old owner, tell her how well he has settled in, bonded with your dog, reassure her that she did the right thing for the dog etc, at least until the microchip is transferred. who is in possession of the paperwork doesn't matter as much as where the microchip points to.

XingMing · 17/04/2021 20:37

I think you sound like the better and more responsible owner for this dog in the long term.

serin · 17/04/2021 20:38

I'm with the others who think she has had a better offer. Just tell her that sorry, he is part of your family now and already much loved by your children. He will have a home for life with you.

curlymom · 17/04/2021 20:38

I would go talk to the family. Maybe they thought it was best but now miss the dog and realise it was a mistake. In two days it’s ok as yo7 haven’t bonded much

Aprilshowersandhail · 17/04/2021 20:40

My dd left her do and took ddog. Vet didn't bat an eye when she changed the details via them.

toocold54 · 17/04/2021 20:40

I feel sorry for her it’s obvious she loves the dog and misses it very much.

I would reply that they made that decision for a reason and that you’ll promise you’ll give it a good home and someone will be there during the day to take care of it. Say you understand but that you’ve already fallen in love and that you’re more than happy to send pics on a regular basis and that if your circumstances ever change and you need to get rid of him then you will contact them and tell them straight away and not give him to anyone else.
I think she is regretting it now but will remember why she had to get rid of it in a few days time.

FranklinTennessee · 17/04/2021 20:42

I feel sorry for her it’s obvious she loves the dog and misses it very much.

Yeah right.

GreyhoundG1rl · 17/04/2021 20:45

@toocold54

I feel sorry for her it’s obvious she loves the dog and misses it very much.

I would reply that they made that decision for a reason and that you’ll promise you’ll give it a good home and someone will be there during the day to take care of it. Say you understand but that you’ve already fallen in love and that you’re more than happy to send pics on a regular basis and that if your circumstances ever change and you need to get rid of him then you will contact them and tell them straight away and not give him to anyone else.
I think she is regretting it now but will remember why she had to get rid of it in a few days time.

God almighty!
If circumstances change and you need to get rid of him... Some of you shouldn't be allowed near animals at all. Wtf?!
BillyTodd · 17/04/2021 20:45

@Aprilshowersandhail

My dd left her do and took ddog. Vet didn't bat an eye when she changed the details via them.
Vets don't. Microchip companies do. In my experience.
memberofthewedding · 17/04/2021 20:47

Im a business person. You did a deal and the transaction is complete. Block her calls and texts and move on.

XingMing · 17/04/2021 20:48

Although to be fair to the original owner, between 8 and 15 months of age, puppies are like teenagers. You love them, but they are not easy to live with. I took my first ever dog to the vet for something trivial at 13 months old and lamented how hard she was and that we were thinking of finding a different home for her, yet two months later she turned into the best family dog ever. It is the toughest stage of owning a dog. The next two dogs were the same, but we were prepared for it. Puppies are cute, and mature dogs are wonderful but there's a difficult stage in between that is hard going. Teenagers....

Terminallysleepdeprived · 17/04/2021 20:48

@Billytodd is corrent. The Chip company have said they will contact the previous owner, I have also added notes to explain the situation and confirm that I have all the vet records and pet passport and can provide copies of the messages confirming transfer of ownership.

They are fully aware of the scammers out there, it is £15-20 to transfer it. Take the dog to your vet and get it scanned, they can usually tell you the company to contact too

Sarahlou252 · 17/04/2021 20:49

Smelling a rather large rat.
I too, am willing to bet someone has offered her more money.
Nobody rehomes a dog on a whim. It would have taken weeks, if not months, to come to that decision. Its not something you can go back on in two days.
I would send a really polite response to say in the best interests of the dog, it is staying with you. Get the chip changed as soon as possible and enjoy your new pup x

toocold54 · 17/04/2021 20:51

God almighty!
If circumstances change and you need to get rid of him... Some of you shouldn't be allowed near animals at all. Wtf?!

Oh please!

Obviously circumstances change which is why the original person got rid of it (and why I foster dogs whose owners are escaping DV situations).
In this case I would say it to get the ex owner off my back. I remember my sister getting a kitten from a litter and the owner phoning her crying as she was worried she’d give it to someone else and that she’d have it back in a heartbeat as she misses them all. 8 years later they’re still in contact and my sister wouldn’t dream of giving it back but it gives the lady peace of mind.
It’s quite normal to worry about a pet after you have got rid of it.

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