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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's actually insane to take your children to Buckingham Palace at 1am

166 replies

ConstantlyChanging · 10/04/2021 19:53

I wouldn't normally 'pick on' someone in the news for their actions but am I alone in thinking this is actual insanity? A man took his children to Buckingham Palace at 1am to pay their respects to the Duke (to 'avoid the crowds').

He also says they were 'quite cut up' about the Duke dying. I mean come on - he's 99 and you didn't know him?! Why the hell would you drag your kids out in the freezing cold street to stand in front of the palace at 1am?

www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-56699776

YABU: This is normal behaviour

YANBU: This is ridiculous

OP posts:
Teddyandsuzie · 11/04/2021 01:24

It’s school holidays, why not?

Probably something they’ll remember all their lives.

Rockbird · 11/04/2021 01:40

I was taken up to BP after Diana's death. I was older, not a small child but we went because it was a bit of an outing, and to have a nose round and, yes, to be a tiny part of history.

I haven't seen the clip you're talking about but I can't get worked up about it. I'm sure the kid doesn't give a toss about PP but it's something to tell back at school I suppose. I'm sure they'll survive the late night.

WeekendCEO · 11/04/2021 01:40

Probably something they’ll remember all their lives.

They’ll have no choice, the footage is there. 😬 They will probably be so embarrassed when they’re older, poor kids. But dad will get lots of attention so all is well. 🙄

pallisers · 11/04/2021 01:43

@Cissyandflora

It’s the sort of adventure I’d do with my kids. Not because we are mourning but just because it’s good fun to go out together and have exciting adventures. I’m too tired or I’d do it myself.
a man dies at aged 99 and it is an adventure to go to a place he sometimes lived.

I think the words exciting adventures mean VERY different things to people,

londonscalling · 11/04/2021 01:54

A woman was interviewed outside Windsor and said she was as upset as when her dad died. Seriously???!!!

WeekendCEO · 11/04/2021 02:03

A woman was interviewed outside Windsor and said she was as upset as when her dad died. Seriously???!!!

Maybe she didn’t like her dad much. 😬🤣

1forAll74 · 11/04/2021 03:18

The Duke was a kindly , friendly and sensible royal.and did not like any faff about his position in life.. He would have told people to go home,out of the cold, and go to bed,instead of standing outside the palace in the middle of the night., and he may have made one of his cutting jokes to add a bit of flavour !

Zoopet · 11/04/2021 04:22

@Loveisthehope

Just a side note, I did notice that the majority of the flowers weren't in plastic wrapping and were laid apart from each other which is much better than them all ending up in a mouldering heap.
Perhaps the flowers were socially distanced?
JustAnotherPoster00 · 11/04/2021 05:16

The Duke was a kindly , friendly and sensible royal and did not like any faff about his position in life..

Did you know him well?

Lex345 · 11/04/2021 05:54

3 or 4 years ago, we took our 3 children to London-mainly to see the touristy sights. I have to admit they were probably a bit bored for some of it (I wasn't, selfishly, I love London, its so beautiful and diverse), I cannot imagine they would have enjoyed a 1am jaunt to Buckingham Palace. I feel for the Queen, I cannot imagine how hard it must be when you have been married for so long for that person to not be there in the morning when you wake up; but I don't see how my travelling to Buckingham Palace to leave flowers the public have been told not to would help her grief in any way whatsoever. I think its nice that Prince Phillip will have a quiet funeral in line with his wishes; he has lead his whole life in the public eye, I hope people do respect this and don't line the streets-it is quite disrespectful to do so if the person did not want that.

QuidditchQueen · 11/04/2021 06:00

Anybody who goes to Buckingham Palace to “pay their respects to the Duke” at any time of day is a complete simpleton anyway, so this isn’t much more ridiculous
Indeed!!

sashh · 11/04/2021 06:23

That little girl's face, dad and bro might have wanted to be there but she certainly didn't.

When Charles and Diana got married, I was taken out to look at the palace at stupid oclock. I was bored shitless and wanted to leave. I would have prefered to stay at home but too young. Had a "tantrum" as I didn't see the point in being there not like I was going to the wedding haha.

Oh you have reminded me, my mum wanted to go to London for that. Off topic anecdote.

I was about 14 and my brother is 2 years older, we tried to reason with her that we were old enough to stay at home.

She actually cancelled an operation she was due to have and then bought a hat.

The hat had white flowers on it, she tried to die some red and blue but the dye ran.

In the end we didn't go so my mum sat on a cushion in the middle of the room wearing her nightie and her hat with dye stains and drinking Champagne, watching it on TV.

My grandmother came round to watch on a colour TV (I swear she was the last person on the planet to have a B and W TV) and spent an hour or two complaining that "Anne shouldn't have done us out of all this".

My brother and I are not royalists.

It was an odd day.

SimonJT · 11/04/2021 06:27

If you’re fairly local and its a decent hour its fine, but in the night is a bit weird. But then any time there is a royal ‘event’ you get the nutters.

Its on my partners cycling route, he commonly sees people waiting outside at 6am near an ‘event’.

somuchlaundrytowash · 11/04/2021 06:32

Bonkers. Yanbu

BerniesMittens · 11/04/2021 08:00

I rolled my eyes too.

A nonagenarian lady has lost her husband. Sad, but no one is immortal!

GlacindaTheTroll · 11/04/2021 08:19

Was he local?

Are there any rules that say you can't take your daily exercise after dark?

Harmless eccentric IMO

moochingtothepub · 11/04/2021 08:25

I do not get it, I don't know him, why would I lay flowers that will simply wither and die? Didn't get the Diana thing either. I will participate in the minutes silence, but laying flowers, no.

I do feel for his family like I do for all the families i arrange funerals for but grief, no, I couldn't do my job if I got emotional about people I don't know

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 11/04/2021 08:30

@grumpygiraffe

Anybody who goes to Buckingham Palace to “pay their respects to the Duke” at any time of day is a complete simpleton anyway, so this isn’t much more ridiculous.
This feels very much like a message from HRH himself, from beyond the grave Grin
peak2021 · 11/04/2021 08:34

Visiting at 7am in daylight when it is I am sure very quiet would have been much better and the family would have seen the parks nearby and the Palace, not just a few lights.

Vicarious grief and grief tourism does seem to have grown in recent years, starting with the death of Diana, Princess of Wales in 1997.

JeanClaudeVanDammit · 11/04/2021 08:36

I wouldn’t but I can’t get exercised about this, I mean there’s nothing else to do at the moment is there.

greeneyedlulu · 11/04/2021 08:37

To get on tv of course!! The dad will be living off this for years.... dweeb!

AIMD · 11/04/2021 08:38

Yea this is ridiculous and over the top.
I don’t really see why anyone, expect people who were truly fans of the royals/duke or had a personal connection needs to travel to lay flowers.

If you happened to live near by or be passing a moment of quiet contemplation is one thing. Actively travelling by train with kids to plonk some flowers down for someone they barely know anything about seems totally tapped.

LakieLady · 11/04/2021 08:41

@Asterales

GappyValley

grumpygiraffe

Anybody who goes to Buckingham Palace to “pay their respects to the Duke” at any time of day is a complete simpleton anyway, so this isn’t much more ridiculous.

This!

^And this!^

Yep, this!

Some people seem to have completely lost the plot imo.

Roussette · 11/04/2021 08:42

I think there is nothing wrong in someone feeling sad and if going to Buckingham palace supports them then I support that

There is everything wrong... here is the official statement

"With the safety and wellbeing of the public in mind, and in accordance with Government guidelines, members of the public are asked not to gather in crowds."

"Those wishing to express their condolences are asked to do so in the safest way possible, and not to gather at Royal Residences," it continued. "During this time the Royal Family ask that members of the public consider making a donation to a charity instead of leaving floral tributes in memory of The Duke of Edinburgh."

LakieLady · 11/04/2021 08:49

@peak2021

Visiting at 7am in daylight when it is I am sure very quiet would have been much better and the family would have seen the parks nearby and the Palace, not just a few lights.

Vicarious grief and grief tourism does seem to have grown in recent years, starting with the death of Diana, Princess of Wales in 1997.

I think it's become positively competitive, like there's some sort of virtue in it.

I agree it started with the death of Diana. I was very glad that I was away, staying in a fairly remote place, with friends who only have the tv/radio on if there's something they want to watch, so was spared the worst of it. It seemed like some sort of collective madness when I saw the news bulletins.

I was also glad I wasn't at work. Book of condolence in the entrance hall, black drapery round the huge signed portrait that hung in an ante-room, staff all gathered for a collective prayer and silence at 9.00 am on the Monday after she died. Some of my colleagues were in tears, apparently.

I would have struggled to keep a lid on my republlican beliefs.