To ask if anyone here is a SENDco or has experience with SEN in school?

[Leviooosaaah]

I’ve posted before about my eldest DS who is about to start secondary and has SEN; I got some fantastic advice and I’m going to contact his secondary school next week when they open to discuss support. I want to be prepared so I’m turning to you lovely lot again.

We have the following:

He is selectively mute and receiving SALT for this.

He finds it impossible to make new friends (he has friends but these friends are starting to outgrow him so I don’t think they will last much longer).

He has daily explosive meltdowns including throwing things and banging things as he is so wound up from school.

He is unable organise himself, find his own clothes or socks, or regulate his own homework. It causes arguments if we try to encourage him to do this.

He is unable to get himself out of the bath or shower and get himself dried; he relies on me to do this and it has to be done a certain way. Any encouragement to get him to do it himself results in crying and shrieking.

He will not leave the house and hates to go out.

He will not enter a shop but also does not like to be left to wait in the car . If I walk out of sight in a park or outside of our home , he gets upset and feels like I’ve left him.

Has no desire to play out with his class mates and is impulsive , easily persuaded to do the bidding of others and does not act upon road safety.

He could never (at this stage) get on a bus or buy something independently in a shop.

He refuses to engage in homework on any level and is unable to pack his own school bag.

He can only make a basic sandwich of cheese spread or such like; he can not make toast and needs a lot of supervision. He is unable to “find” things he needs.

He can not describe or verbalise his feelings and has a way of thinking that I can not comprehend at all (I try!). If something goes wrong , his version of events in the way he sees it sounds completely irrational (but is rational to him).

He can not not deal with unexpected changes to his routine and even a minor upset can change his mood for the whole day.

He has to be encouraged, bribed and argued with to conduct simple basic hygiene such as washing and brushing his hair. This causes hours of meltdowns.

Academically he is clever but is attaining average grades and I feel this is hindered by his anxiety and emotional immaturity.

He will categorically not talk about school; even the mention of the word sends him in to shut down and he will not engage in any conversation to help him.

If you are a SENDco , what would you come back to offer us in terms of support?

EHCP appeal is under way but is unlikely to be in place in time for secondary . EHCP aside, would you feel as a school you could meet his needs?

Has he been assessed at primary? How have his current school coped with his needs? My daughter is a selective mute but your son appears to have a range of other behaviours. We found that a paper trail of all the outside agencies that had been involved at primary was the starting point for our high school meeting with the ALN coordinator.

He has not been assessed at primary for educational needs and I don’t think his current school are meeting his needs (he has explosive behaviour after school each day) .

EHCP aside, would you feel as a school you could meet his needs?

I'm not a SENCo but have teen DC with similar SEN. IME different mainstream settings can have very different takes on whether they can accommodate these kinds of SEN, so I don't think anyone else will be able to tell you apart from the school.

Has he been assessed for ADHD/ASD, etc? I found the EHCP process was far more difficult before my DC were diagnosed.

How is he actually coping in class with these difficulties? I know obviously some people are better at masking their anxiety and difficulties than others, but it sounds like they're causing him an awful amount of stress.

If you are a SENDco , what would you come back to offer us in terms of support?

Again, not a SENCo, but I've found that while good SENCOs obviously have some great ideas and will come up with things you might not have thought of, it's helpful if you've discussed what would work with DS beforehand so you know what his wishes are and what support he thinks might help. I find I do have to come up with ideas of things to try in terms of school support when things aren't working, which makes sense as I obviously know my DC and their SEN best.

I would have a think about what you think might help in terms of support, OP. The school may well be unable to fund the support you suggest without an EHCP, but it's worth having an idea of how DS needs to be supported in school before you go in there.

Has he seen an occupational therapist at all? Is he under CAMHS? If so, make the SENCo aware so they can all feed into a support plan. In an ideal world, at least...

How does he do when in school itself?

Was he only diagnosed with selective mutism?

Who was he diagnosed by - what was their qualification?

• a Multi Disciplinary Team is gold standard and recommended especially for complex cases.

We’re you given a copy of the diagnostic report?

• you should have been. This is a statutory requirement. Did it have a section re recommendations? It should have. Can include educational and pastoral therapies. Recommendations for you to follow at home?

Any follow up therapeutic sessions, apart from SALT?
How often are these?
Do you get feedback?

Have school done an Individual Educational Plan?

• this is a statutory requirement. It doesn’t have to be called an IEP but school must write one. It should contain the issue, structures in place to support, date of next meeting to check if support is working. Ideally termly review. It can be educational and pastoral.

The IEP is important. For anyone diagnosed or with suspected difficulties, the IEP is required (by law).
The ECHP is usually about extra monies the school needs to meet the child’s needs. So there is NO good reason why the school shouldn’t write the IEP.

Talk to your GP.
I'm really surprised that your Primary school has not discussed at least some of these issues with you.

assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/398815/SEND_Code_of_Practice_January_2015.pdf

This is the Government’s SEND Code of Practice.

Don’t be put off by the length. Most sections won’t apply and it’s very repetitive re it’s core functions.

• if your DC have a diagnosis or a suspected difficulty the school are under a legal requirement to accommodate & write an IEP.
• if they do not write the IEP or fail to put into place any of the recommendations from the diagnostic report, they MUST explain why. Must = statutory requirement to explain why not.

The opening para’s are a good explanatory introduction and the IEP section is clear.

This will not hinder the ECHP appeal, but if your DS does not have an IEP, I would be asking, why not.

Because most of what you've written here is out of school behaviour it won't be considered relevant to in school. Although the out of school behaviour is almost definitely caused by his needs being unmet in school (coke bottle effect) while he's holding it together in school you'll never get them to assess. I say never but I mean before end of primary. They're only concerned about how behaviour effects school.
You should try to get a private Educational psychologist in to see him in school. Pick someone who also works with the local authority and is known so they don't try to disregard.
The EP will notice things in your son that the school don't and will report on his difficulties. With this you can build a case, first for a EHCP needs assessment... then hopefully if needed an EHCP. Without one you'll never get any extra support nevermind a specialist placement.
Sadly many children unravel in their first year of secondary, and then this might all end up happening anyway.

Also, OP, when you say the EHCP appeal won't be complete by secondary school, do you mean September? When did you appeal?

I think your son may really struggle with mainstream school? Perhaps a SEN school might be a better option for him?

Nooooo don't pick an EP who works with the LA, do the complete opposite. If they work for the LA alongside their independent work they will deliberately avoid anything that may upset the LA

@mojoj there is nothing to suggest at this stage needs can't be met in mainstream, specialist isn't always better.

Has he had an autism assessment? He sounds neurodiverse by what you describe?

He sounds like whilst he is academically able, he has a lot of holistic development that is needed and to be supported with at his own pace. Tricky in MS. Def need that EHCP!

@LonginesPrime he has confirmed ASD and mutism. He conforms at school but he has extra intervention as he can’t completely mask his anxiety.

DS isn’t able to verbalise what’s wrong so is unable to say what might actually help him. I think he may need 121 but we have no chance without an EHCP.

@DonkeyKong2019 he is meeting his targets but he is socially and emotionally behind his peers . He does not speak in school other than to his closest friends. He has some intervention but nothing has improved since he was diagnosed in reception .

@AuntyFungal sorry I should have said in OP he is diagnosed with ASD and mutism.

@Nosleeptillbed that is my fear that he won’t get a plan because he masks in school. However, I am aware that there are various areas of an EHCP (not just learning) and he will need specific social communication support in school . He is under the care of various different professionals who all agree he is really going to struggle in secondary.

@LonginesPrime we are about half way through the predicted tribunal timescale so if we win the appeal, an assessment will still need to be carried out meaning it won’t be completed before he starts.

@Mojoj those are my thoughts too but we have no chance of securing a SEN school without an EHCP.

@firepita sorry I should have made clear in my OP . He is diagnosed autistic .

It seems likely to me that your son would be understood better and happier in a good specialist school. What you really don't want is to find that he enters mainstream and gets put on a reduced timetable with the guise of helping him if the school isn't able to cater for his needs. I've worked with many boys who've ended up without a suitable school place because of this practice, or even after encouragement to off roll, which would never have been the family's first choice.

@1Morewineplease his school are aware and have had various interventions in place for him since reception. Unfortunately these haven’t worked and as he has moved up the school, the problems have just increased but I just get told “well he doesn’t do that here” .

OP I’m not an educational psychiatrist but I’m just wondering about ways to help with his anxiety. Does he need to do a full day? Could he has a staggered entry to secondary? Do you need the childcare?
Has a GP supported his anxiety? Have they offered treatment or medication?

@Onceuponamidnight he has already had to have a reduced timetable to transition back to school after lockdown one. I was considering asking his secondary school for this during the first few weeks of transition but I’m not sure if it’s a good idea as he will miss a lot of the settling in activities .

@Disabrie22 he is currently under CAMHS for his anxiety but he’s still on a waiting list .