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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Easter eggs- how would you react

456 replies

Oilpyi · 04/04/2021 10:02

Asking for perspective, neither DH or I grew up with Easter Eggs or much in the way of things- it already seems indulgent, but I’m aware our perspective isn’t always the norm with the world the kids grow up in. That’s why I’m asking...

We’ve had a crazy amount of eggs this year. DH as a key worker was gifted a very generous pile. I got some through volunteering, kids got some from family and from clubs. I was planning to give some away as it seemed so many. They’d weren’t little or cheap either, ones with Lindt bunnies in, London, fancy M&S stuff etc plus some smaller ones with mugs. Not little eggs.

The ones from work etc were in a stack on a sideboard, along with some boxes of chocolate where they’d been for days. A box or two was open and we’d been sharing them already. Neither of us eat much chocolate ourselves and we generally have no issue with the kids slowly eating their way through it, which is what we normally do with gifted chocolate. Open one at a time/ one each at a time and let them eat.

This morning I had left the eggs from family on an armchair and said ‘Easter bunny’s been’ and left the kids while I showered. Fine them opening and eating.

When I came down they’d collected all the eggs and chocolate boxes from both rooms and had opened the lot, a huge pile of ripped boxes obviously frantically opened. They’d then made a pile each of eggs and chocolate sharing it out. Rubbish from boxes everywhere and they’d opened chocolate each and already the carpet was covered in chocolate bits (whilst I’m not Usually precious it was an instant Hoover need or they’d be chocolate stains over a wide area). The floor was a sea of boxes.

It just looked so wasteful they’d rip in like that, so presumptuous we’d not want any given to us (we normally eat a little of what we get ourselves, but not much) and just so expectant they could do it without even asking. I felt sick walking in and seeing such an expensive pile of chocolate just all opened and piled up carelessly- it was more that than either adult wanting any. It seemed so spoilt. No concept of any value or appreciation of it.

The kids are a range of primary ages from the oldest to the youngest spanning yr 1-6. I’m generally a bit irritated anyway with the older ones being messy and lazy and everything being a fight.

So- how would you react?
Say it’s Easter- enjoy and have fun
Or yes, that’s overly wasteful and spoilt behaviour.

OP posts:
poppycat10 · 04/04/2021 14:46

Not read the full thread but would be annoyed at everything being opened at once - open one at a time and eat (one per child is fine, but not 3 kids opening say 12 eggs at once).

However, I get a bit fed up with people who say that they are given too many eggs and therefore must give them away. Just put them away and eat them gradually over the next few weeks - nobody says you have to eat them all in a day (unless you are the OP's kids, obvs).

daisypond · 04/04/2021 14:47

@UrAWizHarry

I swear some people think children are just small adults with the same thought processes.

Fact is, if you leave 4 kids unsupervised in a house full of chocolate they are going to eat it. Don't be a slightly shit parent and then blame the kids.

That is not a fact, so don’t state it as it is. If you think it’s a fact, I would suggest it’s you who are the slightly shit parent.
SofiaMichelle · 04/04/2021 14:48

She said “the Easter bunny has been” and left a big pile of eggs on display for the kids to see then walked away. I’m very much not joking.

FFS. The OP is not complaining about them demolishing the big pile of eggs they could see. @Shrivelled

poppycat10 · 04/04/2021 14:48

Children who learn restraint do better in later life

Yeah supposedly. Lets just write off 90% of kids then, shall we (cue the mountains of posts from MNers with perfect kids who eat one Mini-Egg and respectfully ask Mama and Papa when they may have a second one and would never think of eating a cream egg in one go, never mind a full Easter egg!)

UrAWizHarry · 04/04/2021 14:49

Yeah... no. I just have a sense of reality. They were left alone, given permission to eat the chocolate and had already been eating the other eggs.

Shit parenting.

Iremembertheelderlykoreanlady · 04/04/2021 14:50

OP you failed to set boundaries and left them to it.

Learn from that for the future but for today I'd let it go tbh

daisypond · 04/04/2021 14:51

@Iremembertheelderlykoreanlady

OP you failed to set boundaries and left them to it.

Learn from that for the future but for today I'd let it go tbh

She did set boundaries! The eggs on the chair in the room were theirs to eat, not other ones in a different room which weren’t theirs.
dementedpixie · 04/04/2021 14:55

@UrAWizHarry

Yeah... no. I just have a sense of reality. They were left alone, given permission to eat the chocolate and had already been eating the other eggs.

Shit parenting.

Fuck off with the shit parenting comments
SofiaMichelle · 04/04/2021 14:56

@UrAWizHarry

Yeah... no. I just have a sense of reality. They were left alone, given permission to eat the chocolate and had already been eating the other eggs.

Shit parenting.

Shit comprehension skills on your behalf.
Lalliella · 04/04/2021 14:56

Your kids are tiny! And they were excited. I would laugh about that tbh.

aSofaNearYou · 04/04/2021 14:58

@UrAWizHarry

I swear some people think children are just small adults with the same thought processes.

Fact is, if you leave 4 kids unsupervised in a house full of chocolate they are going to eat it. Don't be a slightly shit parent and then blame the kids.

I could understand in the room, but in the house? I regularly leave children in the HOUSE with chocolate and do not for a moment expect them to just eat it all. What a weird mentality!
LondonJax · 04/04/2021 14:58

@Lalliella - since when is 11 years old tiny? Just about to join senior school...

and it's fine to laugh about it - I would too. But after I'd sat them down and explained that, when I say it's the eggs on the chair, it's the eggs on the chair and not any others they find lying around. I wouldn't expect to micro-manage an eleven year old.

Ohnomoreno · 04/04/2021 14:59

I can see why you were annoyed. The older children should have known better, but I suspect they pulled the usual trick of claiming it was all the youngest fault (and mystifyingly they were unable to stop them). I've noticed a lot of boundary pushing from all my kids recently, I think they're a bit tired of being constantly managed and told where to stand/walk/play at school.

aSofaNearYou · 04/04/2021 14:59

[quote Cam77]@aSofaNearYou

I really don't understand why it would "never fail to surprise people" that people would apply basic discipline to their children
It’s not about adults applying or not applying discipline, it’s about adults not getting wound up about about a fairly trifling bit of naughty behaviour from v.excited under 6s![/quote]
I don't think anyone is wound up. I'm not mortally wounded by every naughty thing my DD does but I still tell her if it was wrong because I want her to learn.

dementedpixie · 04/04/2021 15:01

@Lalliella

Your kids are tiny! And they were excited. I would laugh about that tbh.
6-11 year olds are not tiny
fruitpastille · 04/04/2021 15:01

I would be shocked if my children ripped open every egg in the house at the same time and left piles of ripped boxes and bits of chocolate all over the carpet regardless of whether it was their own chocolate. I let my kids eat as much chocolate as they want on Easter Sunday but expect them to do it without wreaking havoc. I would definitely be cross.

CakeRattleandRoll · 04/04/2021 15:06

I would definitely be cross and there would definitely be consequences if my kids did that!

MarieDelaere · 04/04/2021 15:08

That really is a bit of a "fuck you, mum (and dad)" from the 11 year old.

I'm not surprised you had "words", OP.

How would I react (to answer your thread title)? I'd go a bit ballistic.

LynetteScavo · 04/04/2021 15:09

I would have been cross and got the hoover out and tidied up.

I would probably have suggested making chocolate crispy cakes with the chocolate.

I would have felt guilty about getting cross.

daisypond · 04/04/2021 15:11

I would have been cross and got the hoover out and tidied up.

Why would you have got the hoover out and tidied up? The children are all capable of doing that themselves.

corcaithecat · 04/04/2021 15:15

You can’t delegate adult decisions to a child, particularly as you haven’t expressed your wishes very clearly. You’re appointing the 11 year old as the remaining children’s supervisor in your absence, which is not uncommon amongst larger families, but I think it’s not a good way to parent. It’s lazy parenting and misses the fact that they’re still a child too.

Food for thought: My friend was always having to be responsible for younger siblings and now she’s very low contact with all of them because she isn’t interested in being their substitute parent. A Christmas card once a year is about the sum total of her communications.

MarieDelaere · 04/04/2021 15:15

That's what I mean about it being a "fuck you, mum" moment from the 11 year old. He's made a mess, encouraged the younger ones to join in, and it's mum who gets to either clean up or supervise the cleaning up.

She was only getting a shower.

TillyTopper · 04/04/2021 15:16

I'd chill and laugh! It's Easter! If they over-indulge they'll learn a lesson and be sick :)

aSofaNearYou · 04/04/2021 15:18

You can’t delegate adult decisions to a child, particularly as you haven’t expressed your wishes very clearly. You’re appointing the 11 year old as the remaining children’s supervisor in your absence, which is not uncommon amongst larger families, but I think it’s not a good way to parent. It’s lazy parenting and misses the fact that they’re still a child too.

Ffs, what on earth is unclear about pointing to a pile of eggs and saying those are yours?

If I put my DDs dinner on the table and said here you go, I wouldn't expect her to go to the fridge, get something else, and say "well it wasn't CLEAR". They were in a different room. It was easily clear enough.

LondonJax · 04/04/2021 15:18

Well that's your friend @corcaithecat. I had to supervise my younger siblings from 11 years old after school and we couldn't be closer. Stop the guilt trip. The mum was in the shower. It would probably take two minutes to go and get her and ask if they could open the others.

If a parent can't have a shower or use the loo when an 11 year old is in the house in case it's 'too much responsibility and they can't be trusted' words fail me.

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