Feeling unsettled by neighbours moving

[Heartofgoldmumof2]

I already know this is really stupid. But we bought our house 10yrs ago at the same time as our neighbours. We got the keys one month apart. Both houses were wrecks. Needed total refurbishment.

I did a complete job. Strip back to bare brick, rewire the whole house, new ceilings, sanded floors, plastering walls. Installed downstairs toilet. Everything was new and I chose it all.

They had 2 kids, 18 my months ago they had a 3rd. We have 2 kids. Their second and my first child are the same age.

We needed a 4th bedroom because my husband works from home. We had a girl and a boy so they needed their own room. So we did a loft conversion and now have a really large master bedroom with en-suite. At the time we couldn’t sell the house because we were in the middle of renovating the garden which is really large and long but it’s very steep. So it needed digging out and terracing. I would have had to take a big drop in value to sell.

The garden project is still ongoing. I’m probably a bit frustrated that it’s taken 5 years but we have done both front garden creating a driveway, half finished the back and completed the loft conversion in that time. Not helped by lockdown last year. Things were on hold. It has taken a long time to complete.

I really like where we live. 1930s house, good room sizes. Our road backs on to woodland so we have great views and wildlife. We have a train station 5 mins round the corner. 10 mins from motorway junction and great bus links and only a 30min walk to the city centre. It ticks a lot of boxes.
We have everything we need.

I looked for 4 beds round here. There really are not many. Most have either extended or converted loft.

I know it’s really stupid to feel like this. They they are moving on and we are left behind still plugging away the garden. Plus I’m a bit worried what sort of neighbours we will get. Whether they have kids? As we are a semi- we make a bit of family noise. I hope they have kids.

Can anyone else relate to this?

So you’re jealous they have completed and can make the decision to move to something bigger and better and you’re not there yet?

Ten years is quite a long time to be renovating to be honest and still not be finished.

This whole post makes me very glad I didn't move into a fixer upper. It sounds like a massive ball ache and way more thought and effort than I could be bothered with. Ten years to do a garden! Is it the size of Hyde Park?!

@Heartofgoldmumof2

Sorry if talking about my renovations sounds like bragging. It is really not intended to be- just showing what attachment I have to the home I’ve have made. Otherwise people would say if you want to move just move.

I really don’t believe I’m jealous as I don’t want bigger and better. It was a conscious decision to stay where we are.

But the neighbours have done their renovations and completed. They are now ready to move into something new. I am still going and it’s not yet finished. I am a little frustrated it’s taken this long.

You do sound like you want to finish and move on though. Otherwise you would have accepted that neighbours will come and go and you will still be there, finishing your renovations and then re-decorating over the years in your forever home.

Count your blessings op.do you realise how much you have?you have worked so hard for this,cherish it.your path in life is not your neighbours path.
If you wanted to you could think about going into property development or interior design,but please don't think the grass is greener.

All these posts later and OP still wittering on about home decor, and unable to explain what exactly it is that she needs to ‘get over’ 😆 if the new neighbours haven’t bred and are disturbed by your kids noise, your next project can be soundproofing, OP.

‘This isn’t about keeping up with the Joneses’
on a thread that’s solely about keeping up with neighbours and obsessively comparing every detail about their lives.

This would make a great plot for a movie. Two identical families move in next door to each other. On the surface they are polite and friendly but tensions grow behind net curtains. Who has got the latest worktop for their kitchen. Who has got the best marriage. Who has got the most highest achieving children? Then slowly but steadily one family starts to move ahead of the other. Gets the newer car earlier, is invited to more dinner parties and eventually, shock, horror, moves to the new fancy house in the most upcoming neighbourhood. Revenge is the only option. I'll make you pay for stealing my life, mwa ha ha

I get it, OP.

A few years ago, before the DC started school, there was an exodus from where we live in East London to places like Harlow, Bishop's Stortford, Romford, Chelmsford etc. People wanted more space, a driveway, quieter streets etc.

It made me very restless, and I did feel left behind, and it was not envy, because we had exactly the same options but I was (and am) 100% clear that I don't want to move to those places. But I didn't want to be left with nobody to hang out with, and the more they went over their (perfectly sound) reasons for leaving, it did make me question my choices. I don't think that is a bad thing tbh, because it makes you think about what you really want.

Anyway time moves on and I no longer feel restless. I'm sure you won't either, once you have processed this.

Bit of a stealth post here. Your house sounds nice , especially as you now have a msssive en suite master bedroom 🙄 and a huge garden
Be grateful for what you have