To think that this is massively inappropriate

[Goodytoshoes]

A little boy tragically died in my community late last week.

Ever since his death people within the community (I highly doubt many of them knew the little boy) have been sharing pictures, news articles, general posts etc. about him, it's all over my news feed.

When the funeral director posted on Facebook about his death, a girl I am friends with on Facebook wrote underneath it, and tagged the mother and grandmother in the post saying "sorry for your loss".

I just think it's massively inappropriate to be sharing posts constantly and writing condolences on Facebook. Condolences are a very private thing, and should be kept as such. I've only ever written a condolence in private messenger if I have no other form of contact with the person who has lost someone, never would I dare put it on someone's Facebook wall, or any type of public post.

This little boys family have Facebook, so when they login they'll see things about him everywhere, adding to their heartache.

Am I just old fashioned, or is this inappropriate?

A family member died suddenly a few years ago, he was only mid 30s.

The amount of best mates he had was unbelievable. If he had had as many friends in real life as he had on fb when he died he would have died a happy man. Grief junkies the lot of them, it's a really disgusting way sm gets used. People piggy back on other peoples grief as they are attention seeking. It's disgusting. A pm of condolences is one thing. Sharing a photo from 13 years ago saying 'heartbroken, me and the main man at college in 1997, can believe he's gone. Rip, fly high angel' when the friend in question hasn't spoken to him in 10 years is just inappropriate.

I posted on fb when both my parents died because it was easier than speaking to people and actually having to say the words (to multiple people). Possibly easier for people to offer condolences as well, if they are unsure what to say in RL. Of course my close friends and family gave me RL support too. A friend recently lost their mum and has posted a pic on fb, and I have commented with condolences.i will also send a card.
I think it depends what the family have posted themselves, and should be led by what info they have given out publicly. If they have not mentioned it, then I wouldnt write on social media.

A pm of condolences is one thing. Sharing a photo from 13 years ago saying 'heartbroken, me and the main man at college in 1997, can believe he's gone. Rip, fly high angel' when the friend in question hasn't spoken to him in 10 years is just inappropriate.

I was really good friends with someone at Primary School and in the first few years of high school, she died a couple of years ago. We were really close, she had issues with her parents and spent a lot of time at my house as a result. She left school in 4th year and I stayed on then moved away to Uni. I never kept in touch because I didn’t have any details of where she moved on to and I knew her parents wouldn’t pass on any mail. I tried to find out where she had moved on to, but nobody seemed to know.

I was still very sad to hear she had gone as I had always hoped we’d be back in touch, same way as I reconnected with many old school friends when SM became more of a thing. Just because people lose touch, doesn’t mean they aren’t sad to hear of them dying.

The term grief thief springs to mind.

@Omemiserum a local funeral company used to post on Facebook pre Covid, about the funerals they'd done. Especially if they had something unusual about them. No names ever mentioned but the venue was. Complete with photoshop I presume with the consent of the family. But I found it very odd.