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AIBU?

To feel like a hypocrite, standing outside my house at 8

119 replies

Breastfeedingworries · 23/03/2021 19:39

My mums just called asking if I was going to respect the 8pm Covid acknowledgement of lives lost and I don’t know if it’s right.

I haven’t stuck to the rules, I’ve seen unhappy stressed out friends, my friend whose single with twins has needed me when she left abusive partner. I’ve also saw close friends of mine. I just wonder if I’m disrespecting the dead. :/

I could’ve been a cause of loss of life and I regret my actions the past year, I’ve been foolish and selfish. Feeling lonely and seeing people, just wanting life to be normal for me and dd, I stopped listening to the news, got on with the life I had, saw people. I’m sadden buy what I’ve done the past year but I was trying to keep positive for dd. Lot of changes this year, some good and bad and I just don’t want to be a hypocrite.

Sorry rant over.

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

259 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
54%
You are NOT being unreasonable
46%
ShagMeRiggins · 23/03/2021 22:00

OP, I don’t know you, I don’t care about your life specifically, but I do wish you well from one human to another.

If it’s confession you want, your nearest Catholic Church will accommodate you and you won’t have to suffer mumsnet “abuse.” Hmm

Maybe just a a Lord’s Prayer and a couple of Hail Marys.

Go in peace.

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Libraryghost · 23/03/2021 22:02

@AnaofBroceliande I am so sorry about your Dad. I have lost a couple of good friends and yes I blame the virus too. I could have quite innocently given it to someone in Tesco, there is no point blaming each other..

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AnaofBroceliande · 23/03/2021 22:06

This level of guilt isn't rational or healthy. You need to see a doctor not write a letter to dead people or any other batshit suggestion.

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doesthatmakesense · 23/03/2021 22:08

I look forward to reading some version of this in one of the weekend newspaper supplements. "Exonerated" my arse.

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OfaFrenchmind2 · 23/03/2021 22:11

@Speakuptomakeyourselfheard Sorry you lost a loved one, but what OP did was minor. And most of her "offenses" were done when they were legal to do. With all the uncertainties and non-information we had, she does not deserve either her own recrimination or yours.
I got Covid while respecting the rules, it was just bad luck.

Work on your grief without abusing somebody else, this is not healthy.

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Shallysally · 23/03/2021 22:17

Speakuptomakeyourselfheard

“You and all those like you are truly disgusting! You SHOULD be ashamed of yourself! It's because of people like you that I've just lost a very good friend to Covid, your selfishness makes me sick. I do hope you don't expect the nurses and doctors who have done their utmost to help the sick, to help you if you get Covid, but then I don't suppose you'll own up to them, will you?”

Bit harsh. The OP hasn’t done anything that a large proportion of the country haven’t done. In fact, her apparent wrong doings seem pretty mild, and the beauty treatments and some of the seeing people where in the summer when we were out of lockdown and these things were deemed to be safe.

People where going off abroad, packing UK beaches, going to shopping centres, the pub/neighbours gardens.

Have all who are piling on the OP contributed to reducing the spread outside of lockdown, or have you taken part in any of the above? Hmm

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RichardMarxisinnocent · 23/03/2021 22:20

@KingsRoad

We could have all had Botox in august if we had wanted to.

Indeed. I'm not quite sure why people are getting so angry with the OP, several of the things she has done would have been fine between lockdowns. I've had 3 haircuts when the hairdressers were open, I visited a friend and stayed overnight when allowed.
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Fridacaninelo · 23/03/2021 22:21

Why are people having a go at the OP for having her nails done in August when those places were open?!?!

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lojojomo · 23/03/2021 22:27

I forgive you. Say 10 Hail Nicolas and 1 Our Boris.

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AnxiousAlpaca · 23/03/2021 22:30

And maybe during bad flu seasons all the disgusted people on this post contributed to the death of someone too. You obviously know you’ve made some bad decisions OP but unfortunately that’s what humans do.

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Libraryghost · 23/03/2021 22:33

@lojojomo

I forgive you. Say 10 Hail Nicolas and 1 Our Boris.

Love this. I stepped dangerously near my neighbours door earlier while handing her a parcel. I will say 1 hail Chris Whitty before I go asleep tonight. I am a bastard.
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AgeLikeWine · 23/03/2021 22:42

I didn’t stand outside tonight. I didn’t clap, either.

What I did do over the last year was stick to the rules very strictly and did everything I possibly could to avoid putting myself or anyone else at risk. My conscience is clear, so I don’t need to indulge in hypocritical public virtue-signalling to assuage it.

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ExtraordinaryQuince · 23/03/2021 22:46

@Royalbloo

As time went on, I went and had my nails done, I’ve had filler appointments and Botox in august.

What the actual fuck????

THIS. What the actual fuck.
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RuggerHug · 23/03/2021 22:58

If you feel guilty just because your Mum mentioned it I'm guessing this has suddenly come from realising she could have been someone infected,suffering or dead because of equally unnecessary actions similar to the ones you took. It's done now, you can't take it back but beating yourself up won't change anything. What do you do now, for your mind and everyone else's safety. You were wrong but you don't have to keep going.

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Emeraldshamrock · 23/03/2021 23:07

I forgive you. Say 10 Hail Nicolas and 1 Our Boris. 🤣 You've been forgiven OP put it behind you now.

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lughnasadh · 23/03/2021 23:13

LegAndSparkle
Writing a letter addressed to the dead is for personal reflection/catharsis. You obviously don't send it!

Grin Crying!

If one were to lose the plot completely, what would be the appropriate address to use?

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WindmillsOfMyMind6 · 24/03/2021 01:21

@Royalbloo

If we all ignored the guidelines to go and get Botox, fillers and see our friends, where would we be now? Nonsense - you should feel guilty.

If the poster who had botox was in England then we were no longer in lockdown last august. She didn't technically break any actual rules. you could argue maybe she shouldn't have had it done , but she didn't actually do anything criminal.
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Pinktaco · 24/03/2021 02:06

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

GreenSlide · 24/03/2021 02:41

I mean, there have been times in the last year when we have been encouraged to get out of the house by the government so I'm not sure why everyone's acting like YABU for not locking yourself up for a year. Have you been wearing a mask, washing your hands, working from home if possible?

Some posters here are so busy looking at the splinter in each other's eyes, they're missing the planks in their own.

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PuppyMonkeyBaby · 24/03/2021 05:25

@lughnasadh

LegAndSparkle
Writing a letter addressed to the dead is for personal reflection/catharsis. You obviously don't send it!

Grin Crying!

If one were to lose the plot completely, what would be the appropriate address to use?

Grin Grin Grin
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Changemaname1 · 24/03/2021 05:36

Ffs everything was open in August before anyone posts another WTF about botox

All the holier than thou types Make sure once Covid is off the radar that you stay inside all winter won’t you else your a flu Spreading granny killer

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SuperCaliFragalistic · 24/03/2021 05:44

I don't really know what you're looking for here OP. The salons were open for business last summer and by using them you contributed to your local economy. You have tried to get through a year of lockdown with your marbles in tact, as have we all. Some of us have gone out and got on with life in between lockdowns, some have stayed at home for the whole year. There have been numerous threads on here about levels of compliance and one thing that is always clear is that people get through it in their own way. For some that means stretching the definition of a bubble to its limit, for some that means berating people on line who exercise for over an hour. I've had enough of it all, personally. If you shone a torch last night I hope it gave you some comfort, if you chose not to, then that's fine too.

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QuidditchQueen · 24/03/2021 05:45

Had no idea there was yet another clapping planned. Utterly mawkish nonsense.

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MacDuffsMuff · 24/03/2021 05:46

All the holier than thou types Make sure once Covid is off the radar that you stay inside all winter won’t you else your a flu Spreading granny killer

I'm not even sure what you're trying to say here but I assume it means that if you've been trying to follow the rules, you're a 'holier than thou' type.

CoVID did kill my granny as it goes. I wish my cousin, who gave it to her, (after going to a party) had been a bit more holier than thou, then it wouldn't have happened.

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Inthevirtualwaitingroom · 24/03/2021 06:19

what do you want from this thread.?

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