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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel this crushed

88 replies

handholdplease2222 · 21/03/2021 00:01

About 3 weeks ago I started speaking to this guy who lives in London, we hit it off and the connection (even just through FaceTime initially) was amazing.

He decided to drive all the way to Cornwall and rent an Airbnb for a week to 'see me' whilst also working.

He arrived last Friday and was busy seeing 'friends' until he eventually met me on Tuesday night. We then met again on Wednesday night, this time I went back to the AirBnB he was staying in. Another amazing night and we connected on more than an emotional level... ugh

Since then, he hasn't been responding to my calls due to being "knee deep in work" or "on a work conference" (until midnight on one night).

I then, after a bit of digging, found that a girl had left a review for the AirBnB commenting on how amazing their stay had been last week. He was there with a girl the whole time :'(

Fuck knows where she was when he met me Tuesday and Wednesday but I genuinely feel crushed. The lies. The false hope. It's just too much right now and I can't stop crying.

I know it was only 3 weeks but that was speaking everyday, getting on so well etc and then equally having an amazing connection in person. It felt so genuine.

OP posts:
nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 21/03/2021 18:12

I'd comment on the review and tell the girl where her boyfriend was, the disgusting little weasel.

merryhouse · 21/03/2021 18:13

Go and tell the police about his threat. Show them the message.

Then contact the woman. Or not, if that's not how you roll.

jelly79 · 21/03/2021 18:15

I'm normally up for chalking these things up as experience.
But he has told you a decent story for you to be available when he was ready for you, to sleep with you, then ghost you. And now threatens you.

Absolutely sell him out. Scumbag

OP play a slower game next time x

MrsTerryPratchett · 21/03/2021 18:21

@merryhouse

Go and tell the police about his threat. Show them the message.

Then contact the woman. Or not, if that's not how you roll.

This. Fuck his life up the twat.

Also, don't shag randos who break rules. They are more likely to break other rules, like being a decent person.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 21/03/2021 18:43

@B33Fr33

Can you respond to or add to the review? Seriously. Fuck it up for the piece of trash.
Ffs don't do that if it's a review from his girlfriend, she's done nothing wrong and you'd be publicly letting everyone who can see the page know he cheated on her instead of doing it privately or not at all. It would be horrendous to comment on the poor girl's review and blindside her about something personal on a public page. Christ. It's not her fault her boyfriends a prick. Let her know if you want to but don't drag her publicly into this shit show.

He sounds like a cunt OP, the school shooting comment he made was absolutely mental too!

youvegottenminuteslynn · 21/03/2021 18:51

Why does he know exactly where you live?

While he's turned out to be an utter cunt, it's important for you to look back at your own responsibility for your mental, physical and emotional wellbeing.

You've shown poor judgement and I'm really sorry he's turned out to be a complete arsehole / nutter, so let it be a lesson for a few things like not letting them know where you live when you've only known them a couple of weeks.

As he's been aggressive in his messages I would personally block and never contact him or his girlfriend. Your responsibility is to keep yourself safe, not 'trash' him like a PP said. He IS trash, obviously, but angering a nutjob who has threatened you when you can instead walk away doesn't seem like a sensible or responsible course of action.

Don't write on the public review either. That poor woman he's with might have no clue so if you really do want to 'expose' him (don't let people here persuade you that you have to do this - I personally don't think it sounds like a safe option from what you've said about him) then doing it publicly is cruel and humiliating to her when you could send a private message she can then process and make a decision about.

As I say though, based on his behaviour I would block on everything, move on and think about how to reduce the likelihood of anything like this happening again.

Chimeraforce · 21/03/2021 18:59

Oh I'm sorry this happened to you. Be fair on yourself. This turd is a pro so book a sti test.
You could consider letting the girl know.
He's a dirty bastard.

Mylovelyhorsee · 21/03/2021 19:36

He’s a garbage human.

MintLampShade · 21/03/2021 19:57

@Mamamamasaurus

OP did you miss the global pandemic...!!??
😂😂😂 love it!
HPenthusiast · 21/03/2021 21:13

I’m so sorry this has happened to you. He sounds like an asshole.

Butttt breaking covid rules is so annoying when we all want to see people/ travel. I live in Cornwall too, can’t go anywhere for the last year and I think it’s so frickin selfish of him, the woman and the person who owns the air Bnb. They should only be open to ‘essential workers’ 🤔

nimbuscloud · 21/03/2021 21:46

What possessed you to think any of this was a good idea??

MintLampShade · 21/03/2021 21:51

Are you guys seriously buying this?? Like all of it??? 🤨

nanbread · 21/03/2021 21:53

He sounds bloody awful OP.

On the flip side you've learned some really valuable lessons:

People can pretend to be anything online

If someone isn't as available as they should be, they are probably not that into you / into someone else (in this case literally)

Don't give your address out to people you don't know well, you'd literally met this guy twice in total

bookworm29x · 21/03/2021 21:56

Air BnBs aren't even open right now are they? Hmm

Chunkymenrock · 21/03/2021 22:02

OP deliberately avoiding the subject of disregarding lockdown...Hmm

Checkthemeaning · 21/03/2021 22:06

@LagunaBubbles I'm not a nurse! No idea where you pulled that bullshit from 🤣

And to the poster who said about 'casual sex helping mental health' we both know you're being a dick. She wanted COMPANIONSHIP like all human beings do.

Nice to see some compassion on this thread.

NormanStangerson · 21/03/2021 22:12

@merryhouse

Go and tell the police about his threat. Show them the message.

Then contact the woman. Or not, if that's not how you roll.

Do this. Fuck him right up. He’s threatened you. Get it on file.

And then message the woman. He won’t do shit bit if he threatens you again after you tell her, the police will already have it on file.

JackieWeaverHandforthCouncil · 21/03/2021 22:23

Are Airbnb’s operating now?

Gloomandglow · 21/03/2021 22:24

Which Airbnb is taking bookings at the moment?!

Just chalk it up to experience and never contact him again. You could waste so much time letting this eat you up or you could let this go and move the fuck on. He's clearly an arse and you don't need that in your life.

nimbuscloud · 21/03/2021 22:24

People can pretend to be anything online

So very very true ....

Megan2018 · 21/03/2021 22:28

You reap what you sow!
I’d suggest a Covid test and an STI check tbh. Then perhaps try actually complying with lockdown.....

MrsTerryPratchett · 21/03/2021 22:32

@nimbuscloud

People can pretend to be anything online

So very very true ....

Grin
DavidsSchitt · 21/03/2021 22:46

Haha, what have I walked into here?

Is this Cornwall, UK? And if so, why is everyone suddenly using the terms "trash", "garbage" and "yeah, fuck him up"? Confused

Nelia5 · 21/03/2021 22:49

Report his threats to the police, hopefully they will fine him fro breaking covid rules

moanieleminx · 21/03/2021 23:01

Tell her. Show her his threats as well.

Ex military have (IME) huge infidelity issues

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