Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have told off these children in the park?

102 replies

Lollyneenah · 19/03/2021 22:07

I feel like I might have been tbh.

Took my dd (9) to the park after school today and was watching from the bench as she played on a swing. She'd been on it a couple of minutes when 3 girls who looked about a year older sort of gathered around her.
She makes friends quite easily so I assumed all good until she got off quickly and walked away. I caught up with her and she was red faced and tearful. She said that the one of the girls had called her a" fat loser" (she's neither of those things) in order for them to use this swing.

I went straight over to the girls and asked her to point out who her mother was as I wanted to speak to her about her behaviour. This girl was surly and rude and wouldn't point out her mum so I said "speak to my daughter like that again and you will be in a world of trouble".

I feel so fucking rubbish that I lost my temper and spoke to a 10 year old like that.

I'm normally so cool headed but eurgh.

OP posts:
Etinox · 19/03/2021 22:39

@Donotfeedthebears

I don’t blame you at all but you’re lucky you didn’t get shanked. Primary school kids carry knives these days!
Bollocks.
Tinty · 19/03/2021 22:40

I don’t blame you at all but you’re lucky you didn’t get shanked. Primary school kids carry knives these days!
Sad
That is terrible Confused

DisappearingGirl · 19/03/2021 22:40

I think you were right too. It really isn't right if some kids are allowed to get away with doing and saying whatever they like to people. They bullied a young girl off a swing - pathetic of them.

Herewegoagainok · 19/03/2021 22:40

Gosh who lives in fear of primary school kids, you must never leave your home 😂

Op you did he right thing. It feels harsh to have spoken to a young child that way but I'd have no qualms with a parent doing that to my child if they'd behaved so horribly and refused to allow adults to talk about it.

Cam2020 · 19/03/2021 22:40

*32garlictwist

I am quite surprised by some of the replies on here. I wouldn't have interfered in a children's argument but would have just talked to my daughter about it later and given possible suggestions for responses etc. I don't think the parents need to get involved for some name calling.*

What part of three older kids rounding up on OP's, daughter was an argument?!

JeffTheOracle · 19/03/2021 22:42

No you don't have to put up with a bit of name calling anymore as a pp so charmingly put it.

Well done for getting involved - one child having a disagreement with another is very different from your child being intimidated off the swings by 3 slightly older girls

Lacucuracha · 19/03/2021 22:44

She saw you stand up for her OP, it will do her a world of good in the end.

Cam2020 · 19/03/2021 22:45

The lesson here for those kids is that there's always someone bigger and with more authority in life than you. They targeted your daughter because they thought she was alone (vs) 3and younger.

You've demonstrated that's its OK to stand up to bullies.

Changemaname1 · 19/03/2021 22:52

Nah I’d have done the same if someone spoke to my dc like that don’t feel bad , they shouldn’t have been so horrible

BornOnTwelthNight · 19/03/2021 22:52

I would have and have done the same. But having 3 girls standing over her must have been quite intimidating. You did right to stand up to them on her behalf. Don’t feel bad.

pabloescobarselasticband · 19/03/2021 22:53

You were far more polite than I would have been, horrible little brats!

JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows · 19/03/2021 22:53

I'd have done exactly the same OP. Your poor DD

Tankflybosswalkjam · 19/03/2021 22:54

Well done you. If I was that girls mother she would have had a second bollocking and I’d have thanked you. It takes a village etc.

Idontbelieveit12 · 19/03/2021 22:55

Ahh when my daughter was 11 a load of kids from her class arranged to meet up at the park. When they saw my daughter coming they all ran away. She rang me upset and I went to meet her, they ended up walking past us so I gave them a piece of my mind 🙈 I felt the same afterwards but now I’m glad I stuck up for her. You did the right thing, bullies shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it.

ChaToilLeam · 19/03/2021 22:56

Good for you. Bullies need to be dealt with, and firmly. You were pretty restrained by my reckoning.

Audreyhelp · 19/03/2021 22:57

I can see why you done it . However maybe teach your daughter to speak up for herself . As you won’t always be there.

SpongebobNoPants · 19/03/2021 22:57

You’re a lot calmer than me. I would have probably gone full Peyton from the Hand that Rocks the Cradle 😂😂😂

I definitely didn’t accidentally on purpose trip up the little shit who was bullying my daughter when they were 8... or bend down to “help” him and quietly threaten him either. Honest Grin

3peassuit · 19/03/2021 22:58

It was 3 older girls on one. Of course you were right to reprimand them. If one of my daughters had behaved in the way you describe, I would have been more than happy for an adult to have told her off.

imalmostthere · 19/03/2021 23:00

@SpongebobNoPants

You’re a lot calmer than me. I would have probably gone full Peyton from the Hand that Rocks the Cradle 😂😂😂

I definitely didn’t accidentally on purpose trip up the little shit who was bullying my daughter when they were 8... or bend down to “help” him and quietly threaten him either. Honest Grin

I have found my people - this is me 😂
Namechange1991x · 19/03/2021 23:00

You did the right thing. My mum never stood up for me when people were mean, grabbed me, etc. I grew up never feeling safe or cared for and as an adult would let people walk all over me and ended up having therapy with mental health issues. May seen an extreme example, but as parents our kids need us to be their safe place and to protect them. You did the right thing. Hope your DD is ok.

Amdone123 · 19/03/2021 23:04

You definitely did the right thing. Little shits needed talking to.
My granddaughter wanted to play out last night, so I went and stood with her. The other kids were a bit older (about 8,9. She's 5). My granddaughter was loving watching them play, and enjoying the banter. I saw one of them, all of a sudden, with a knife. It wasn't a carving knife, it was a table knife. I asked her what she was doing and told her to take it back inside. She said she just wanted to pop a ball, but I was so shocked.

Parents nowhere to be seen.

m0therofdragons · 19/03/2021 23:04

If my dc was mean to another dc and I wasn’t aware so unable to deal with it I’d have no issue with the dc’s parent telling her off. My experience of dealing with jumped up dc is to stay very calm and speak firmly / confidently “your behaviour is not ok” then walk off - never engage in an argument with them because you open yourself up to their meanness and they can be vile (I used to work in a school - my experience was boys would hold their hands up and apologise, girls would blame everyone and everything and refuse to take responsibility). Well done for standing up for your dc.

SpongebobNoPants · 19/03/2021 23:05

@imalmostthere Grin I’m not even a little bit sorry either

Youseethethingis · 19/03/2021 23:10

You performed a public service. If little fuckers like this got more dressings down from strangers as they go along maybe they would straighten themselves out for an easier life.

Swipe left for the next trending thread