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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel sad that the world of work as we knew it has gone forever?

809 replies

Youngatheart00 · 15/03/2021 21:07

My work confirmed today we are moving to 100% remote working and will only get together a few times a year for team meetings. I find this so sad. I loved my working life - I know realise so much of that was down to the people. Now all I do all day is stare at screens and give myself a migraine.

They are justifying it by saying ‘most people’ want this despite me never seeing any such survey. It’s a blatant cost cutting exercise.

Anyone else fed up and lonely?

OP posts:
gingganggooleywotsit · 20/03/2021 22:45

Very sad. In the past lots of people met their partners at work too, that won't be happening now. Feel sorry for young people who may be working in flat shares or small studios too.

Userg1234 · 20/03/2021 22:53

To be honest it was only a matter of time before companies realise it was cheaper for them that staff work from home.embrace the advantage that you don't have tto get up at 6 to get to work etc etc.

ThreeorFour · 21/03/2021 00:20

@gingganggooleywotsit

Very sad. In the past lots of people met their partners at work too, that won't be happening now. Feel sorry for young people who may be working in flat shares or small studios too.
I think it could massively increase inequality and add further barriers to people from disadvantaged and deprived backgrounds. People in housing poverty shut out of office (now home) based careers?
prawntoastie · 21/03/2021 01:20

selfish reply but, going to be honest im happy about this. I work 16hrs as a support worker but I also run a business so it does benefit myself.

Youngatheart00 · 21/03/2021 11:14

And yes, Sunday dread is still a think when wfh. Maybe more so.

OP posts:
thecatandthevicar · 21/03/2021 12:07

I love my commute. It's about half an hour, in the car, audiobook on. It's a real switch between home and work.

nothing stops you from going for a run or something to make the switch, that's the point.

As soon as the restrictions are gone, your options will be unlimited. If you HAD to find that half an hour to commute, you can find it even if you don't have to commute.

I don't advocate WHF for the sake of being stuck in a tiny room and have no life, I love it for being able to compartmentalise work, close the door and have a life.

The alternative is commute, be stuck in an office for hours, not that efficiently due to the people who waste your time and energy there, commute back, deal with house chores, catch up with more work in the evening.

Even going to the gym or for a run whilst in the office, having to take a shower and get change at lunch time is really not that practical.

Being able to have time for family and hobbies instead, to see friends is making a massive difference to quality of life and mental health. Instead of being stuck in the office on Friday, I can go away for the weekend and finish work in my weekend rental, and only come back on Monday morning!

You just need restrictions to ease. I never want to work full time in an office again - I will have to meet clients and team from time to time, but as little as possible.

thecatandthevicar · 21/03/2021 12:08

It might mean moving if you are not in town but missing the city, or moving in the country if you find the city boring, but isn't that what people have always done?

Move and relocate to whatever was more convenient for them? (and affordable)

TheKeatingFive · 21/03/2021 12:09

nothing stops you from going for a run or something to make the switch, that's the point.

Psychologically that doesn’t do if for me. The progression / distance between A&B is important. I don’t want my work and living space to be the same.

thecatandthevicar · 21/03/2021 12:12

@TheKeatingFive

nothing stops you from going for a run or something to make the switch, that's the point.

Psychologically that doesn’t do if for me. The progression / distance between A&B is important. I don’t want my work and living space to be the same.

A run was an example, you can do other things.

But if you really want to be AT WORK and not at home, you still have more choices and opportunities than those who don't.

There are a hell of a lot more jobs who can't be done and will never be done from home than jobs that are.

TheKeatingFive · 21/03/2021 12:14

The discussion isn’t particularly relevant to me anyway. My business would never shift to a wfh model. Even now, most people are in, despite not being strictly necessary.

RampantIvy · 21/03/2021 12:31

Some people seem to have a lot of hobbies. Please can you say what they are?

Youngatheart00 · 21/03/2021 12:51

I’m also trying to lose weight which my sedentary lifestyle definitely isn’t compatible with so perhaps I’ll build in the discipline of exercise at the end of the working day. Even if it’s only 20 mins. At the moment, I reach for the wine.

OP posts:
foolishtoad · 21/03/2021 13:20

i loved my commute as well. WFH i can never leave the house before starting work because i feel too guilty to leave DH to sort out DC and get them to school.But I never felt any guilty bwfore the lcokdown. I feel like mum guilt has crept all over my life so am only doing work and the kids.Work was my time to myself

NothingIsWrong · 21/03/2021 19:12

@TheKeatingFive

nothing stops you from going for a run or something to make the switch, that's the point.

Psychologically that doesn’t do if for me. The progression / distance between A&B is important. I don’t want my work and living space to be the same.

Same here. I do run, and I get up at 5.30 to go before I go to work. But getting up from my dining table to go for a run only to get back to have to put my back out shifting the screens so we can eat together does nothing for my mental health.

And I have made choices. I left a job I'd been doing for 15 years with people I really liked because they said it was WFH forever. Been back in an office for 3 weeks now and it's great.

A massively unsuitable WFH environment is not something I can get away from without either divorcing or moving house, neither of which is an option. I wish people could understand this.

NothingIsWrong · 21/03/2021 19:15

@thecatandthevicar

I love my commute. It's about half an hour, in the car, audiobook on. It's a real switch between home and work.

nothing stops you from going for a run or something to make the switch, that's the point.

As soon as the restrictions are gone, your options will be unlimited. If you HAD to find that half an hour to commute, you can find it even if you don't have to commute.

I don't advocate WHF for the sake of being stuck in a tiny room and have no life, I love it for being able to compartmentalise work, close the door and have a life.

The alternative is commute, be stuck in an office for hours, not that efficiently due to the people who waste your time and energy there, commute back, deal with house chores, catch up with more work in the evening.

Even going to the gym or for a run whilst in the office, having to take a shower and get change at lunch time is really not that practical.

Being able to have time for family and hobbies instead, to see friends is making a massive difference to quality of life and mental health. Instead of being stuck in the office on Friday, I can go away for the weekend and finish work in my weekend rental, and only come back on Monday morning!

You just need restrictions to ease. I never want to work full time in an office again - I will have to meet clients and team from time to time, but as little as possible.

Interesting you picked the bit of my post about my commute to comment on and no the bit about the physical restrictions of space that make it utterly miserable.

And I successfully ran in my lunch break for years - and in fact will be doing so tomorrow, never been an issue.

DeusEx · 21/03/2021 19:16

@Youngatheart00

And yes, Sunday dread is still a think when wfh. Maybe more so.
Agree. With added temptation to pickup laptop or work phone on Sunday evening ‘just to have a quick look’
icheatatscrabble · 21/03/2021 19:30

People in housing poverty shut out of office (now home) based careers?

Definitely - I saw an ad for online work that actually specified that a dedicated quiet work area without interruptions was essential, and the tech spec (quite up to date smartphone and laptop + headset) would be pretty expensive if you needed to update them to get this job. So that would rule out a lot of otherwise good people who just couldn't afford to meet the basic requirements.

Viviennemary · 21/03/2021 19:45

I agree. Ok if you have a nice house and quiet comfortable placd to work that is warm in winter and is maintained to a good order. A lot of folk don't have that luxury.

Kimye4eva · 21/03/2021 19:47

@foolishtoad

i loved my commute as well. WFH i can never leave the house before starting work because i feel too guilty to leave DH to sort out DC and get them to school.But I never felt any guilty bwfore the lcokdown. I feel like mum guilt has crept all over my life so am only doing work and the kids.Work was my time to myself
This. This is definitely a thing.
RampantIvy · 21/03/2021 20:38

Definitely - I saw an ad for online work that actually specified that a dedicated quiet work area without interruptions was essential, and the tech spec (quite up to date smartphone and laptop + headset)

Shouldn't the onus be on the employer to provide the equipment? They would if office based.

My employer has provided everything I need to do my job except a desk, so I just bought an inexpensive, but sturdy table from Amazon.

Youngatheart00 · 21/03/2021 20:47

Yes work can provide the equipment - a laptop, a screen and a printer maybe, but you still need the space for a desk, an office chair, quiet working environment and a good broadband connection. In London, you need to be pretty far up the food chain (or married to someone who is) to assume thats available.

OP posts:
NothingIsWrong · 21/03/2021 23:12

@RampantIvy

Definitely - I saw an ad for online work that actually specified that a dedicated quiet work area without interruptions was essential, and the tech spec (quite up to date smartphone and laptop + headset)

Shouldn't the onus be on the employer to provide the equipment? They would if office based.

My employer has provided everything I need to do my job except a desk, so I just bought an inexpensive, but sturdy table from Amazon.

You just bought a desk? Great that you have funds for that and somewhere to put it.
RampantIvy · 21/03/2021 23:17

I'm sorry if I upset you @NothingIsWrong Sad

I would still prefer to go to work and see my workmates instead of talking to them on a screen.

Blueberries0112 · 22/03/2021 05:02

www.theglobeandmail.com/business/article-people-are-at-the-point-of-emotional-exhaustion-why-white-collar/ (Sorry it’s a paid article but I am going off the title )

NothingIsWrong · 22/03/2021 05:35

@RampantIvy

I'm sorry if I upset you *@NothingIsWrong* Sad

I would still prefer to go to work and see my workmates instead of talking to them on a screen.

Nah that's OK. Just fed up that many people and employers assume that it's easy to set up a super little homeworking station and flip to WFH with no issue.

I'm lucky in that I've moved jobs no issue, but for many people that's not possible.

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