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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To be angry at the frenzy caused by others last night

999 replies

BarometerTV · 14/03/2021 12:56

I think it was utterly disrespectful. We are in lockdown and it was not the right time for a protest. I agree with a quiet, respectful, socially distanced space to grieve - which is what appeared to happen during the day.

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Roussette · 14/03/2021 20:05

I'll reply to who I want to thanks thread police.

Sparechange · 14/03/2021 20:08

@Livelovebehappy

Can you tell me what about my account gives you the impression it wasn’t peaceful?

Ffs half the people there had dogs with them. These weren’t people rioting. They were standing still holding a candle with a terrier or Cokerpoo sitting at their feet, and tears in their eyes.

If a police officer pushes me forward while screaming in my face to move back, I’m going to point out the stupidity of their request.
No one was violent. We were deliberately being provoked and pushed, and no one reacted with anything other than frustration and bewilderment.

Sparechange · 14/03/2021 20:11

And banners. Here are pics I took of banners, just around 6pm
Those people stood there for ages silently holding the banners. There was also a middle aged woman holding a big ‘end violence against women’ placard where I was standing. Didn’t see many others tbh

To be angry at the frenzy caused by others last night
Bigsighall · 14/03/2021 20:15

Its very sheltered to think all the people where there for a peaceful vigil. Most will be peaceful yes, but there’s always the rent a crowd trouble makers at these things who give no shits about the cause but want a fight.

Sparechange · 14/03/2021 20:18

@Bigsighall

Its very sheltered to think all the people where there for a peaceful vigil. Most will be peaceful yes, but there’s always the rent a crowd trouble makers at these things who give no shits about the cause but want a fight.
Yes, and they went to a different location. The windmill pub. Look it up on Google maps and see how far it is away from the bandstand where the vigil took place

All the footage of the violent male protesters seems to have been taken by the windmill.

thecranberries · 14/03/2021 20:19

You have no idea what happened on the ground. None of the media today covered the full extent of peaceful, quite calm. Things only got bad when the police - in force - went through the peaceful distanced crowd and then began to trample on the flowers, grab women who were just saying 'we should not have to have our human rights trashed by men' and then continued their intimidation and assault. I know as I went to Clapham Common on dog walk with my 14 yr old dd, who has been regularly upskirted and harassed by men, since she was 11 year's old whilst on tube, with her school friends. Remember, the previous weekend there was a football match and the police 'guided' all the male fans whilst they were in a crowd, many unmasked, marching through the streets for jubilation at their team winning. One rule for men during Covid - yeah, go out and express your joy at your stupid team winning, and another rule for women "What, you want to have a vigil for a woman killed by a police officer? How dare you challenge the patriarchy!" That is the message we got. At a vigil. For Sarah Everard. So, don't make stupid statements without knowing the full facts.

Graphista · 14/03/2021 20:23

Sickening the number of presumably women on this thread who think the mets actions were remotely acceptable, they should never have been allowed to handle this event it's way too close to home for them (and would be whenever it happened)

Frankly there should be an inquiry into the misogyny and bias within the met and not just in relation to the accused officer.

@Roussette that's great you've written to your Mp. A shame you feel it will be ignored.

Regarding news footage, sadly this is also nothing new, it calls to mind for me the way thatchers govt censored footage of the miners strike so that it was edited to look as if the miners were being violent without provocation which was far from true.

It's actually good now that we have sm so that unedited or at least differently edited video footage can be broadcast and often shows things aren't as they were reported on "the news" which means we are all gradually becoming more aware of just how biased the msm are

If people are breaking the law

1 they weren't - a court decided they could go ahead

2 laws aren't always just or fair

Indeed as of tomorrow our civil liberties may well be fucked!

It’s the classic abusers’ line “Now look what you made me do”.

Yep! A pattern of behaviour Eric Berne noted in one of his "games" "see what you made me do"

"and he [the game setter] is only too happy when it [the excuse to attack the other party] occurs"

it was a PR disaster waiting to happen at the very least it was an extremely stupid and irresponsible decision to make to allow met police anywhere near this event

Bloody hell, to the police, and men in general, the right time is never exactly

Isn't the Met commissioner a woman?

Women can be misogynists too

Wow! And now Dick thinks she knows better and has more authority than a judge/court?! She needs to go now!

I find it very odd that claims they were spat at etc are only emerging now - after almost a day of criticism

They're not being "condemned for doing their job" they're being condemned for thinking their job confers on them the right to intimidate and bully others

No but it does give them the right to arrest people, which is what they did. which they are only supposed to do in certain ways and not use excessive force, they are very well trained in how to gain control of a "suspect" and that is not what I saw happening

Did I read right at 1831? Do you REALLY think police protect us all the time? There have been several forces found to have been not recording reports from victims of vawg, not just acting poorly but refusing to even legally record the initial reports.

Recognising that the majority are "good" officers is not an excuse to ignore the "bad" - indeed the good officers WANT the bad ones out! They are just as disgusted when they are protected

Hillsborough tactics would be used and they would be painted as anti lockdowners and Covid deniers.

And that's exactly what's happening isn't it?

Police are also supposed to be able, skilled and trained at identifying and separating any troublemakers from the peaceful people - for the peaceful people's protection too, seems these officers/this force are seriously lacking in training and skills

BarometerTV · 14/03/2021 20:23

@thecranberries your version of events isn’t the only version either.

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Dorsetdays · 14/03/2021 20:24

@thecranberries. Again, that might have been your experience if you were there but it wasn’t everyone’s. Therefore not stupid statements just different accounts.

donewithitalltodayandxmas · 14/03/2021 20:25

@JoanWilderbeast thats what I have asked

MorganKitten · 14/03/2021 20:27

@BarometerTV

I know nothing more or less than any of you, so don’t attack me for giving an opinion. I feel sorry for the police quite frankly. I think the vast majority are decent people doing an incredibly difficult job - and then vilified by the public. I have no idea whether the amount of force used last night was disproportionate - as I’m not purely relying on media reports and I wasn’t there. But events during the day looked respectful.
I was there, I saw what happened. The police kettled us while we were standing with candles, they trampled the flowers, they dragged women away from placing flowers down. They caused the issue.
Dorsetdays · 14/03/2021 20:27

And my understanding is that the court didn’t decide the event could go ahead at all, they returned an undecided verdict as the law wasn’t clear.

The event organisers then decided to cancel as they would potentially have been liable for £10k fines.

BarometerTV · 14/03/2021 20:27

@Graphista how the hell was any of this acceptable - when a woman’s body had only been discovered a few days previously, and the family had specifically asked for this not to happen.

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BarometerTV · 14/03/2021 20:31

@dorsetdays - clarity over the law is needed. Again, I would have hoped that people would have enough humility to realise this wasn’t the right time to enforce a political agenda.

OP posts:
MercyBooth · 14/03/2021 20:32

Funny how not as many ppl were as worried about public health when EONs security hack was leaving customers without electric...........in a pandemic. Its almost as if ppl only care about Covid and public health when it can be used for emotional blackmail.

donewithitalltodayandxmas · 14/03/2021 20:32

@BarometerTV yes its the family I feel
Sorry for , they should of been respected in this

BitchAssBitch · 14/03/2021 20:33

It's never the right time. If people seeking change waited for the right time, there would be no change at all.

donewithitalltodayandxmas · 14/03/2021 20:33

@MorganKitten but there are a couple of others on here saying they see something different ?

donewithitalltodayandxmas · 14/03/2021 20:34

@BitchAssBitch you don't do
It in someones name though if thats not their families wish , can people not see that

Lineofconcepcion · 14/03/2021 20:34

I stood in solidarity at picket lines from 1980 through to the mid 80s.

Nothing has changed, the level of police brutality has possibly become less so, probably because everyone can record them now. It was a Tory government then, silencing the working class printers, then miners, and it's a corrupt Tory Government now, silencing women.

Nearly 40 years on and nothing has changed. I still look behind me when I'm out at night, the only reason I don't get verbally and sexually assaulted now is because I'm too bloody old for them.

So to the women on here who disagree with the vigil/protest, whatever you choose to call it, piss off back to your homes and let the rest of us try and make the country a better, safer place for our daughters

Dorsetdays · 14/03/2021 20:34

@BarometerTV Absolutely agree.

donewithitalltodayandxmas · 14/03/2021 20:35

@Graphista you can't not have the police at an event like this, how can you think they would have no police at an event attended by a large number of people

Sparechange · 14/03/2021 20:36

[quote BarometerTV]@thecranberries your version of events isn’t the only version either.[/quote]
It’s weird, isn’t it, that every single account on this thread from people who were actually there is nearly identical
And matches the accounts of the widely respected journalists who were also there.

But @Dorsetdays has a third hand account (and I’m going out on a limb here to guess that her username alludes to not being from here and therefore not getting the nuances in locations between the vigil and the violence)

But you are going to real pains to give equivalence to her third hand account and the multiple first hand accounts.

It’s almost like you don’t like the eye witness accounts that don’t fit your agenda...

Btw I’ve got plenty more pics from the evening that will totally corroborate my version but I’ve already posted them on my (private) insta account so don’t really want to put myself on here.

But if anyone genuinely doesn’t believe my version of events, feel free to PM me the parts that you feel need clarifying and I’ll send you the evidence

donewithitalltodayandxmas · 14/03/2021 20:36

@Lineofconcepcion and what about ten victims family ? Do they not matter

BonnieDundee · 14/03/2021 20:39

i feel sorry for the police quite frankly

Hmm

I feel sorry for the woman they pinned to the ground tbh. Makes me sick how some people will defend the indefensible.

@Graphista excellent post