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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel immensely sorry for

106 replies

AliceLives2021 · 09/03/2021 09:30

MM's dad.

I mean the interview this morning. He said that H told him it was his own fault that he had a heart attack! WTF seriously. He missed his daughter's wedding due to a heart attack and Charles walked her down the aisle (although they seem to dislike C as well now). He stupidly released her letter since he couldn't get through to the couple and now not allowed to see his grandchild. I feel sad for him.

YABU - stupid to feel sorry for him
YANBU - to feel sorry for him

OP posts:
Emeraldshamrock · 09/03/2021 12:39

I'm not a daily fail reader usually just browsing the comments it is a case of depending anyone but Meghan.
The mentality is barbaric and sheep like.

JeanClaudeVanDammit · 09/03/2021 12:40

He seems dodgy as fuck and the older sister is bitter and bizarrely obsessed. Honestly, I think they’re all pretty awful, MM & H included.

Emeraldshamrock · 09/03/2021 12:40

Defending anyone except Meghan.⏫
Next they'll be interviewing Andrew for his opinion they'd still hiss at Meghan.

DuchessHastings · 09/03/2021 12:41

[quote AliceLives2021]@GreenlandTheMovie

"I am specifically stating that his first mistake led to him being excluded from his daughter's life. The sale of the letters came long after he was excluded for quite a minor thing.
Most counsellots/therapists reccomend very limited civil contact so you don't feel bad or guilty when the parent dies, unless the behaviour was totally reprehensible/criminal. That can be as little as exchanging birthday and Christmas cards. It's quite standard advice."

Indeed. Everyone that encounters MM is bad/cruel/awful and she is entirely blameless .... Hmm Grin

Some people go through life just having the worst of luck[/quote]
You seem like the kind of person who says "some of my best friends are black"

PatsyStone39 · 09/03/2021 12:41

I have a father liker hers, he's toxic and i have nothing to do with him. He plays the victim and folk believe him, but i know the truth - and so does MM.

RedRec · 09/03/2021 12:42

No sympathy for him at all. He is a shambolic fool who has let his daughter down in the most appalling way.

Lampzade · 09/03/2021 12:42

YADBU

DuchessHastings · 09/03/2021 12:45

@KaptainKaveman

"He stupidly released her letter since he couldn't get through to the couple"....

Seriously, how unintelligent although I want to say thick was Mr Markle in thinking anyone could possibly swallow that line?

OP you are a kind hearted soul in giving him the benefit of the doubt but seriously, Judas and Brutus have nothing on Meghan's dear old dad. Hmm.

@AliceLives2021 isn't a kind hearted soul she's a frothing Meghan hater.
Nousernamesleftatall · 09/03/2021 12:45

I do not feel one iota of sympathy for him. He is a narcisstic willing to cash in his own daughter. I don’t know much about it but I imagine he was a crap father too when she was growing up. MM owes him nothing. He is an embarrassment.

GladysTheGroovyMule · 09/03/2021 12:47

He’s a fucking odious waste of space. No wonder his daughter wants nothing more to do with him- he sold his own daughter out and continues to do so, while feeding into the media machine that she says made her feel suicidal at times. What sort of parent does that?

Honestly, even if you don’t like Meghan, it’s been all over the news that the nasty headlines and everything she’s been through made her feel suicidal and her own dad still agreed to an interview with one of the worst culprits. All that useless fucker sees is dollar signs, doesn’t give a fuck about his own daughter or grandchildren.

Ponoka7 · 09/03/2021 12:48

@GreenlandTheMovie
"Yes of course we can talk about people who choose to appear on tv, whether they're royal or not!"

But you don't sell out your daughter and still expect a relationship. We don't see this from other parents of very famous people, or friends of the royals. We don't see Mike Tindall's family do this, we don't even see it from the Rooneys. He's added to the abuse of his daughter.

MessAllOver · 09/03/2021 12:51

Both Meghan and Harry have very dysfunctional families.

isitfridayyet1 · 09/03/2021 12:52

OP you need you head checking, why are you so desperate to paint MM as the bad guy. Very, very sad.

goodbyelenin · 09/03/2021 13:06

He could just shut up publicly, not criticise Harry in interviews (even if he has a point)

and contact his daughter directly to make amend, and he's sorry to miss out on his grand-kids...

I don't remember hearing much from Doria, everybody knows who she is, but she is avoiding the media circus. It's clearly not that hard.

Noseycow20 · 09/03/2021 13:26

@Nospringchickendipper

I think the fact that he said he will continue to do interviews with the press until he can see Megan and Archie says a lot about him. Controlling and abusive.
This is exactly what I think! This comment he made invalidated anything else he tried to say in regards to making amends. He basically said on television that he was blackmailing his own daughter, he’s willing to continue talking to the press until she talks to him. Madness.
namitynamechange · 09/03/2021 13:42

hmmmm, even if I was really horrid to my dad - let my husband blame him for having a heart attack that meant he couldnt attend the wedding; refused to speak to him afterwards; "moved on" with people I thought were better than him, I cant imagine him ever doing a TV interview to rip me apart or sell my letters. He would be very hurt, he would probably tell me (my lovely step mum definately would on his behalf) but I cant in a million years imagine him acting the way MM's dad did. Which does rather suggest he is NOT the wonderful father he claims to be even if we take the other stuff at face value.

namitynamechange · 09/03/2021 13:45

And thats even if I wasnt a) pregnant and b) openly talked about how I had felt suicidal.

Its just not how a genuinely good father would behave no matter how hurt.

NVision · 09/03/2021 13:50

His response to his daughter shunning him for selling out to the press is to... continue selling out to the press.

If you hadn't gone on TV today and just kept getting on with your life quietly, perhaps there would have been opportunity to reconnect in the future.

Now, never. Doing the same thing isn't going to help matters.

Money grabber.

GreenlandTheMovie · 09/03/2021 13:59

@BrumBoo

Yes of course we can talk about people who choose to appear on tv, whether they're royal or not!

There's a difference between discussions and just plain making up shite to fit your narrative.

We don't live in the foreluck tugging 18th century any more!

OK Confused

Now if meghan and Harry were leading a private life, not sulignibg streaming deals, or giving interviews with Oprah, then absolutely I would support not discussing them and respecting their desire for privacy.

They do generally live a private life. Many celebrities do. That doesn't mean they can't ever be seen in public again, or earn money. They'll always be famous, doesn't mean they deserve abuse or be told to disappear forever because they won't play 'pretty prince and princess' anymore Hmm.

But to suggest that they should be able to dictate peoples' response to their deliberately high profile, media-saturated lives is utterly ridiculous.

When the responses are abusive, made up based on hearsay and often racist, they are absolutely allowed to have a say on the matter. As anyone would be when hearing malicious rumours about themselves, which manifest whether they speak or not.

Just as you are entitled to criticise me (and you haven't been holding back in your numerous insults), I am allowed to critique and have an opinion on two people who have chosen, repeatedly, to have a very visible high profile media presence.

I might not be a doctor, but I'm certainly more qualified than either meghan or Harry. We only know of them due to Harry's birth as a member of the Royal family. I had never heard of meghan befire she married Harry. But anyone is entitled to have an opinion.

I do think they're both paranoid, but they are making money out of that paranoia.

There's actually quite a lot of fact and circumstantial evidence which contradict some of the things they have claimed. They are not entirely truthful bit are clearly willing to slightly bend the truth when it suits them to create an overall public persona which shies them in an almost saintly light, whilst others are cast aside.

By the way, if you want to have a proper discussion, you really should try and refrain deom referring to other people's opinions as "shite" or making wild accusations.

I'm not a fan of the royal family, birthright or feudalism in any shaie or form.

I do wish the pair of them would pursue some other work than criticising their own family members. They clearly have considerable talents and contacts and are bright, fun people who together are a particularly attractive package. I'd love to see them using their creative skills to produce a new piece of film or similar, away from the continual "service" or charity agenda, and to go on to be independent, happy people, not continually going over past disappointments in their 0ersonal lives. Imagine if meghan produced a screenplay and got it taken on, perhaps under a different name to ensure no bias. Imagine if Harry produced a documentary about army life. I actually have a friend in Califirnia who, after many years of work, has had a screenplay made into a Hollywood film. I know that it takes a certain kind of pushy personality and dogged determination to make it. There are thousands of gifted, bright, talented people out there who would kill for the opportunities Harry and meghan have had. Its sad not to see it used more productively.

Mummypigisalwaysright · 09/03/2021 15:02

I feel sorry for him because he's clearly unwell and vulnerable and is being exploited by the press for their own agendas.

I have no sympathy in respect of his estrangement from MM and H because he comes across as abusive and controlling. The part where he says he does an interview every 30 days and if he doesn't hear from them he does another is disgusting. That is controlling. And by working with the press and selling her letters after explicitly being told not to, he really had it coming.

I've never really warmed to Meghan, but I can't deny that the treatment she and Harry have received has been vile. The story about her 'holding Archie wrong' at the polo match just proved that the press will stoop as low as they can to have a dig at her.

Personally, I believe that whoever Harry married would have had the same problems. There's a very toxic attitude in the press. William is the golden child and Harry is the scapegoat. The press have to have their extreme opposites, regardless of truth.

stampsurprise · 09/03/2021 15:08

He said that H told him it was his own fault that he had a heart attack

I wouldn’t say this to my worst enemy - that’s really cruel.

Adrianneanneanne · 09/03/2021 15:12

@stampsurprise

He said that H told him it was his own fault that he had a heart attack

I wouldn’t say this to my worst enemy - that’s really cruel.

Wait... so we believe Thomas markles account of what he says- a bloke who is so unhinged he blackmailed good own daughter with press gossip women she doesn't call him

But we won't accept Harry and Meghan when they say anything?

I'm not picking on you in particular but just people who feel sorry for her dad, but claim she's some lying, wicked woman

Hobbesmanc · 09/03/2021 15:45

Anyone whose endured a neglectful, mentally and emotional abusive, narcissistic father would have nothing but empathy with the Duchess. Anyone excusing him or deflecting blame on the child needs to seriously look at themselves and stop condoning ongoing parental abuse

TheKeatingFive · 09/03/2021 15:48

He sold his own kid out, knowing what that would mean for her. He is an absolute prick.

This. No loving parent would do that to their child, no matter what.

Prick is absolutely right.

Zevia · 09/03/2021 15:49

Such a horrid man, gobsmacked that anyone would find him sympathetic.