'That's more a Christmas present' aibu?

[Whosamawotsits]

Its one of my children's birthdays coming up (DS11) he never wants anything, hasn't asked for anything other than a couple of cheapy things he likes. I'm planning on getting him a games console, he loved playing on them at family and friends houses (when we could go over there!) and has nothing but a knackered old tablet at home.
When discussing this with family and friends I've had a few say a 'big' gift is more of a Christmas present! I've never heard of this and can't seem to wrap my head around why they'd think that.
I personally don't think it particularly matters when you'd gift a big gift, but surely if you're going to think any kind of way about spending a little more money on a gift for someone, it's that itd be nicer to give it to them on their birthday rather than Christmas and make their day special?

YABU- Big presents- Christmas
YANBU- Big presents- Birthdays

I think your son will be made up!

I definitely do bigger presents for Christmas. Just what my family always did. Not sure why.

Either, neither, both? If his birthday is soon it seems silly to make him wait a further 9 months for a gift he wants just because it doesn't "seem" like a birthday present.

Both.

I do tend to spend more at Christmas than Birthdays. And I was definitely brought up that way. But at the same time their is no real logic to it.

Both my kids have winter birthdays and it's no unknown for us to buy the odd outdoor thing at Easter because it's a more logical time. During the first lockdown my oldest was getting depressed so I bought an Xbox so he could chat and play with pals.

I don’t really make a huge distinction between what is given for birthdays and Christmas. Ours generally get more gifts at Christmas, but if they wanted something big on their birthday, aims get it then.

I would probably actually prefer to give a console as a birthday present, though as I wouldn’t want it dominating Christmas.

I think this is a case of everyone doing things differently, and there not being a right or wrong.

Growing up birthday presents were bigger gifts and Christmas was smaller ones.

We tend to spend more on Christmas gifts and less on birthday gifts however birthdays usually also mean a party or day out as well.

We don't really budget for either, it depends what they want or need.

We spend the same on both. I think it’s fine for people to do things differently but never understand why they push their way onto others. Sounds like you have a lovely plan so stick with that.

We do excessive bigger gifts at Christmas and birthdays is usually (prelockdown) more about a day out/activities/party with some his friends and a small gift.

But, you do what you want. There are no rules!

Very weird. Presents are presents.

We tend to make a distinction based on season, never on budget. One of mine is from July, so some presents feel more suited for the summer than winter, but that's pretty much it.

You have to be pretty mean spirited to resent children having 2 special days a year instead of one!

Why do you care what other people think? Do whatever works for you and your family.

I didn't vote as I think it can be either ( would depend if they asked for it/showed interest in it around their Birthday or Christmas).

Growing up: I had big presents for Christmas and token gifts for birthdays.
There's no right if wrong way though. Do what you want.

My MIL says this every single year of our DDs birthdays. "It's like Christmas in here!" with faux incredulity.

I find it baffling.

We have a divided view in this house. I think bigger, more expensive presents are a birthday thing.

DH thinks the bigger, more expensive presents are a Christmas thing.

I grew up in quite a poor household and am always conscious of spending, so it makes financial sense to not splurge on multiple people at the same time (Christmas) then struggle after.

Growing up bigger presents were for birthdays because you only have to buy for one.

If anything i think big present given more on a birthday so YANBU! Christmas tends to be bulked out with a load of stuff and multiple peoples presents etc. Birthdays are more thought out and appreciated i sometimes think as you have the time.

My family has always treated them the same, if you need/want a big present at that time, you get one, whether it’s Christmas or birthday. Strange to differentiate. If anything I’d say birthday is more special as it’s just the child getting the big gift, not everyone else too.

Big gifts for either here. Our only stipulation is no joint gifts to be shared over occasions or siblings. I feel a gift should be about that particular moment and for the person when it comes to children.

I’d get an Xbox, or ps5, not a switch. Xbox will be better for games as he grows up and last longer. But get the present when you want. You should tell your friend you’re buying it as a treat - that will blow her mind!

Both. We get big presents for both birthdays and Christmas.

'Our only stipulation is no joint gifts to be shared over occasions or siblings.'

What would you do for something like a playstation? I think this would have to be a shared gift if children similar age who all want one?

We often spend more on DSS birthday then Christmas. We spend about 150 on Christmas present but his birthday is tickets to legoland with a hotel stay which comes in at a couple of hundred not counting the extra bits and Bob's we end up buying there.
Totally reasonable to get it for his birthday. Then once he has it it can be topped up at Christmas with additional games.

Generally they get smaller gifts for birthdays because they want a party as well.

Christmas is for everyone. Birthdays can be expensive.

We normally spent a similar amount but only have one DC. I would imagine if you have more children it makes sense for them to have the larger present at birthdays rather than having a massive outlay at what is already an expensive time .