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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Day off school on birthday?

553 replies

Givemeabreak88 · 06/03/2021 09:36

What are your thoughts on giving a child the day off school on their birthday? If they are asking for the day off..

OP posts:
Whoopsmahoot · 07/03/2021 20:07

Doesn’t matter whether he been at school or not, he goes on his birthday.

EugenesAxe · 07/03/2021 20:10

Parents just don't get the tight schedules we have for covering topics and concepts in school. Honestly, unless they are a verifiable genius, it's not a joke to say that missing even one day could set your child back. Plus it's quite fun being in school on your birthday.

takethegirloutofwales · 07/03/2021 20:12

It’s my son’s 11th birthday tomorrow. First day back at school. Of course he is going. We had a great day on Saturday with birthday pancakes for breakfast, a takeaway of his choice last night and a movie night together. Tomorrow he’ll have gifts before school and we have some afternoon tea cakes being delivered by the time he is home tomorrow. He’s happy enough with that. He will still have a lovely day and at least see his friends.

ilovemygirls · 07/03/2021 20:56

OP - late to the party, but would this mean you got to spend 1:1 time with him?
Just give him the day off if you want. Life is tough, do whatever you think would make him happy. It’s one day, he’s only 7. High school age - nope. Primary age (& if he would be miserable at school on his special day), then do what makes him happy. People need to learn more about SEN. They are find this tougher than ever. A lot of children don’t like school because they struggle to make friends & they just don’t feel they “fit in”. Be kind. Life is short x

Bumblebee1980a · 07/03/2021 20:59

He doesn’t like school hence him asking for the day off. He will be turning 7. Just to add he’s been at school throughout so he hasn’t been at home.

Give him the day off. He's only 7.

I would also be digging a little to see why he doesn't like school. I would be concerned as I'd want my DS to be happy at school

ForeverInADay · 07/03/2021 21:02

Definitely not and I'm usually quite easy on my kids.

2 presents before school, the rest afterwards

Bumblebee1980a · 07/03/2021 21:03

@Givemeabreak88

I’m gonna give him the day off, we’ve had to isolate so many times And I imagine with all kids back that will be happening more and more, so one day off won’t hurt, thanks for the opinions anyway
Hope you both have a lovely day.

Ignore the miserable no people.

Tink191087 · 07/03/2021 21:10

@Givemeabreak88 I’ve always kept mine at home on their birthdays. I’m honest with the school and they’ve always been fine with it! I wouldn’t do it any other way it’s a special day with me and them and even tho they’ve had a lot of time off mine will still be having birthdays at home this year so I say go for it xx

bellie710 · 07/03/2021 21:14

OP ignore all the idiots, he is 7 years old has been dragged out of his bed to be in school for 9am when the rest of his class are still asleep, he is doing a rigid school day which not many are doing and is having a birthday during a lockdown in a pandemic.

Just keep him at home, do no school work, take a day off and enjoy your child's birthday he is only 7 and if you have been working all through the pandemic he deserves a day with his family.

Yellow78 · 07/03/2021 21:15

Go for it! 1 day off won’t hurt, hope he has a lovely day 😊

Blockedoff · 07/03/2021 21:18

@bellie710 ignore the "idiots" who happen to have an opposing view to you?

OP ignore all the idiots who don't know how to parent and set boundaries. That includes @bellie710!

Poopoopoo · 07/03/2021 21:28

You only live once, make it fun. Bugger the sausage factory system. Have a fun day!

wanderlnst · 07/03/2021 21:28

When you call in, will you be telling them that he is off for the day because it is his birthday or will you lie?

yahyahs22 · 07/03/2021 21:29

Yeah

Lisa46 · 07/03/2021 21:30

If he doesn't like school maybe you should look at changing the school?

LovelyIssues · 07/03/2021 21:30

My DS is a summer holiday birthday. If he was supposed to be at school on his birthday I would absolutely be leaving him off

AliTheMinx · 07/03/2021 21:31

I wouldn't dream of letting my DC take a day off school for his birthday...

mapofeasterireland · 07/03/2021 22:36

Wow. Would you say this to someone’s face asking for advice. You sound truly awful

expatinspain · 07/03/2021 22:41

Bunnyfuller What do you mean by one of those adults? Nothing wrong with taking your birthday off as holiday and doing something nice if you want to. I'm a teacher now, so I can't, but when I had an office job I did. Most people in my office did. I have three friends whose companies give them their birthday off as part of the benefits package.

Danlsb · 07/03/2021 22:44

You know you child - if you think he will not miss out academically and you have talked to his teacher about it I would say let him have the day off. He is only 7 and has been attending school so getting social interactions. My brother hated school and was bullied terribly but my mum made him go even when he was begging to stay home because she was told he must send him in. She now regrets having forced him to go and says if she had her time again she would have acted differently. Although I agree with other posters that you need to work with school around why he doesn’t like school.

crewsix66 · 07/03/2021 23:01

If my children want the day off on their birthday I have let them in the past, life's too short, one day won't make a difference. I love making a fuss off them and spoiling them. I also understand a child not wanting to go, some really judgemental comments on this thread. I took my 10 year out of school completely to homeschool because of her severe anxiety, but I'm lucky I've worked from home 9 years and am able to do it. Most parents with disabilities have no option to send children to school, my heart goes out to you. Keep him off and give him a special day, they aren't young forever.

Mamanyt · 08/03/2021 00:02

Nope. It is so simple to just tell your child that they can celebrate the following weekend. Besides, all of their friends will be in school...what are they going to do, sit around and mope?

pollymere · 08/03/2021 00:10

Don't do it. If he's struggling going into school and he sees you giving him a day off, he may realize that he doesn't need to go into school. You need to keep the routine otherwise you'll find it become increasingly difficult to get him into school. Plan to do something nice or exciting at the weekend but you need to keep the Monday to Friday we go to school unless the school is closed routine going. The school can also fine you for Unauthorized Absence. I am speaking from experience here and one day really can flip things.

twinklemom · 08/03/2021 00:19

Go ahead! Make it special. He will never forget how amidst this terrible year you let him miss a day of school on his 7th b-day and made him feel like the king of the world. It can be a good opportunity to talk to him about his hatred towards school and see if there is anything he could do to make his time at school more enjoyable. I never did it, did not have to, but know a mom that did it for 3 of her kids. All of them excellent students and humans, no consequences from being off on their birthday. Good luck!

MyDcAreMarvel · 08/03/2021 00:46

@pollymere The school can also fine you for Unauthorized Absence. not for one day they can’t.