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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is DM being unreasonable? Harmless cause?

94 replies

WormingAround · 05/03/2021 14:28

DH has ringworm confirmed by doctor. It’s in the centre of his chest.
Didn’t think anything of it until my DM said “oh my goodness how has he managed to get that it’s spread by skin to skin contact”.

Myself, DD and DSS do not have it.
DSS is in school (mum is keyworker) and DH sometimes plays football outside.

Is there a harmless explanation of how he’s caught it? I don’t have much knowledge of skin/fungal infections but we’re in lockdown so I suppose DM is suspicious of how he’s managed to catch it.

I feel stressed about it.

Thank you

OP posts:
Ginqueen456 · 05/03/2021 15:41

I caught it from my grandparents cattle when I was small so there could be loads of different ways he caught it. Ignore your mum.

MrMeSeeks · 05/03/2021 15:41

My ex workmate caught it from her relatives cat, within few days she was covered.

MrMeSeeks · 05/03/2021 15:42

Last thing i would have thought is cheating Confused

CoalCraft · 05/03/2021 15:45

Poor bloke. Contracts a highly contagious germ that can be spread in all sorts of ways and his wife thinks he's cheated. I feel sorry for him.

justcannotwithyou · 05/03/2021 15:51

@CoalCraft

Poor bloke. Contracts a highly contagious germ that can be spread in all sorts of ways and his wife thinks he's cheated. I feel sorry for him.
I don't think you feel sorry for him at all if I'm honest. I think it just feels good to say that to a woman who is sleep deprived because of her 5 month old and has a mother who appears to be so bored in life she feels the need to cause drama in her own child's life, possibly due to your own boredom. Hey, I get it. Lockdown sucks! Biscuit
dollibob · 05/03/2021 16:00

I caught it playing football where people walk dogs 🤷🏻‍♀️

saraclara · 05/03/2021 16:15

@user1471457751

Your mum sounds unpleasant. Does she have issues with your husband normally?

Ringworm is highly contagious. I feel really sorry for your husband that you are thinking he's cheated when it is so easy to get ringworm for various sources.

That. Don't even think of challenging your DH on this.

As for your mum... Words fail me.

Coffeekisses · 05/03/2021 16:34

I think it’s the damp/sweatiness of nylon footie shirts tbh! I wouldn’t give it a second thought, some people are just more prone to it. Get him to shower and change (into clean cotton things) after he plays.

Carolina24 · 05/03/2021 17:07

Your mum is shit stirring. It’s hugely contagious, and not only by skin-to-skin contact. Don’t give it another thought.

Muddledupme · 05/03/2021 17:14

Horses often have ringworm and its spread by touch. The football they use on Astro could easily have it if it's used on a mud pitch in between.

looselegs · 05/03/2021 20:02

You can catch it from a million places! My son had it across his stomach- the doctor asked if he went swimming.... seems he caught it from hauling himself out of the side of the pool.

Original poster
WormingAround · 05/03/2021 20:54

@Coffeekisses - I didn’t know you could just catch it from being sweaty. Thank you.

@looselegs - I’ve heard of athletes foot being caught like this. Just strange as we’re in lockdown so these activities are off limits to DH at the mo.

OP posts:
Original poster
WormingAround · 05/03/2021 20:56

@justcannotwithyou thank you. It feels sometimes between anxiety and tiredness that I can’t think logically so your comments help

OP posts:
dancingbymyself · 05/03/2021 20:58

Never ever ever listen to your mum, I'd suggest from this. She is clearly keen to cause you anxiety. And that's really awful of her.

WhereDoMyBluebirdsFly · 05/03/2021 21:02

I got a papercut on my hand once and then developed ringworm. I hadn't been near people or animals!

It's really common and easy to catch. If he had chlamydia then you'd be right to be suspicious but not ringworm. Your DM is really stirring the pot.

AmandaHugenkiss · 05/03/2021 21:12

Loads of ways to catch it.

If someone on his football team had it, handled the ball, he handled the ball and then casually scratched himself in the shower or when he changed his T-shirt. He could’ve petted a cat in the street. He could have dried his T-shirt on the line, and a few bits of dirt or leaves blew on to it.

We used to see samples for this come through our lab every day. It’s far more common than you’d think and most people have no idea where they caught it from.

Please don’t worry!

MyLittleOrangutan · 05/03/2021 21:12

I'd say at football. Maybe even sharing towels or tops. I wouldn't worry about it.

AmandaHugenkiss · 05/03/2021 21:13

Outdoor shoes also a big culprit.

RandomMess · 05/03/2021 21:17

Tell your DH he needs to up his personal hygiene and give your bedding a thorough wash.

If he's run down he could be more susceptible to having symptoms.

Veterinari · 05/03/2021 21:23

A LOT of cats are asymptomatic carriers of ringworm and shed spores into the environment. Does the cat ever lie on him?
It's also really common in soil so gardening,sports etc are all risks.

I've honestly never heard of it being transmitted through sexual contact and I work in an industry where we experience it a lot.

I think your mother is being a cow tbh. How would you feel if your MIL insinuated you'd been unfaithful?

Veterinari · 05/03/2021 21:24

[quote WormingAround]@Coffeekisses - I didn’t know you could just catch it from being sweaty. Thank you.

@looselegs - I’ve heard of athletes foot being caught like this. Just strange as we’re in lockdown so these activities are off limits to DH at the mo.[/quote]
Ringworm is athletes foot - usually same fungus just a different location

CoalCraft · 06/03/2021 06:06

@justcannotwithyou
I don't think you feel sorry for him at all if I'm honest. I think it just feels good to say that to a woman who is sleep deprived because of her 5 month old and has a mother who appears to be so bored in life she feels the need to cause drama in her own child's life, possibly due to your own boredom. Hey, I get it. Lockdown sucks!

I'm sleep deprived with a three month old and my husband recently recovered from athlete's foot (= ringworm). In the past he's even had it in his groin. Shall I accuse him of cheating? Of course not, because being very tired doesn't give me the right to entertain completely irrational suspicions about my spouse. Hopefully I'll manage to resist even if the thought comes from my mum. Man if I got a cold or something and my husband questioned where I'd got it since I haven't been out the house, I'd think he was a controlling jerk and wonder why I was with him.

I'll refrain from being rude and sarky to you.

Mydogmylife · 07/03/2021 17:23

I'm worried about the future of your relationship. Even if you get over this nonsense, I fear your mum is going to be in your ear whispering crap about your DH and from the sound of it you're going to believe her . Being tired and sleep deprived is no excuse , if my DH had believed his mum talking like that about neck would have been devastated , and not sure how to get past it to be honest.

Mydogmylife · 07/03/2021 17:24

*neck. About me I !

MargaretThursday · 07/03/2021 17:27

I hot in many years ago on my back. No pets, definitely no skin to skin contact.

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