Dh left out of will.

[MummypigDaddypig]

My Dh is feeling abit blue and sad.

He was really close to his grandad who sadly passed away in December. A few times within the last few years grandad has announced that Dh will be sorted once he dies and that he’s a “half a millionaire” he would joke, and that he’s refusing to
Leave money to MIL. His reason for not leaving money for MiL is because he bought her house and paid for her first wedding plus she left her second husband for someone else and he wasn’t happy. He told her and us that he had taken her out the will because “she had enough from Me” - his words. When mil was told his she went absolutely crazy, screaming down the
Phone at us etc saying her life is over.. She always said “when my dad dies, I will be sorted”.
Dh isn’t close to his mum at all and spent most of his childhood and teenage years with his grandad, he was the apple of his eye and so much so that Dh worked in the same industry, they spent many fond hours talking about work and mutual interests.

Today we found out that Dh isn’t named as a beneficiary. He is really shocked and upset. I feel so sad for him.
Obviously we completely know it’s his money to do as he wishes. But we would rather have nothing if it meant his mum didn’t get it. She’s not a very nice person.

He messaged her and said that he wasn’t in it etc and she just replied that “it’s dads money to do as he wishes”, I’m 100% sure she’s been left it all.

[TheLostDiadem]

It seems a bit daft to be upset that he’s left out of the will when he gave the wrong name . Did neither you or him not think to give the actual name if being left out of the will is such a surprise.

[yoyo1234]

Hopefully you will be posting tomorrow with good news after your DH phones and says his names.

[Howdoin]

@Twospaniels

He needs to ring the solicitor again and tell them his given name and the name he uses day to day. It’s possible his grandad has put your husband’s “real” name.

this. He needs to phone and clarify if his actual^ name is in the will being as he gave a name that isn’t his.

[oil0W0lio]

Tricky one, MIL sounds like one of those 'child woman with no self awareness' types🙄

[GabsAlot]

i think theres some confusion going on there-he was asked to confirm his name and gave his grandads name


surely then he could still be in the will

[randomer]

Very sad but not as bad as when your own parent and sibling does it to you.

[SixesAndEights]

The solicitor doesn't know who anyone is, so if your husband has given the wrong name then of course he's not going to be in the will! The solicitor's not a mind reader.

[FuckingFabulous]

I think he should call back and give his actual name

[Bluntness100]

@MummypigDaddypig

He gave his grandads surname and dhs first name

That’s a really unusual thing to do. I’m sorry. I’d get it if he gave his grand dads name or his name but to give a a made up one of his name and his grandads surname is very hard to understand.

I think he needs to call them back and explain he was confused and gave the wrong name, alternatively he can email them saying the same thing.

However I’d agree with the others, peoole often say oh I’m leaving it all to you, not my daughter, when they intend to do no such thing, disinheriting a child is usually threatened but not done in the majority of cases.

[Expectingsomethingwonderful]

Usually a will states the relationship of the beneficiary and not just the name. Surnames change all the time - grandchildren get married etc so I don't think the confusion of over the name would happen. I would ask the date the will was written and then it is possible to search for later wills as the grandfather may have gone to a different solicitor or organisation to make a new will. You can search for a will before probate here: www.nationalwillregister.co.uk/aboutwillsearch.aspx

[MummypigDaddypig]

He suffers with reallt bad anxiety on the phone so it took him ages to ring in the first place.

His mum drives us insane, she has no bond with dd or any of us. We have tried so much.

She has always landed on her feet, grandad paid for her to go catering college and bought her a brand new 5 bedroom home which is obviously mortgage free.

[SpudsandGravy]

Family arguments about money like this are very ugly.

[MummypigDaddypig]

[quote Expectingsomethingwonderful]Usually a will states the relationship of the beneficiary and not just the name. Surnames change all the time - grandchildren get married etc so I don't think the confusion of over the name would happen. I would ask the date the will was written and then it is possible to search for later wills as the grandfather may have gone to a different solicitor or organisation to make a new will. You can search for a will before probate here: www.nationalwillregister.co.uk/aboutwillsearch.aspx[/quote]
That’s why we are 99% sure he’s not in it

[Bluntness100]

I’m afraid he’s going to have to call again.

If for example his name is joe brown. His grandfathers name was frank green, if he asked if joe green was in the will, which is basically what he did, then the answer would clearly be no. Obviously. Because there is no such person.

Do you have the same issues, can you call on his behalf, then hand the phone to him, if not.

Alternatively if neither of you can manage a phone call, you can email. The solicitors will have contact details on their website.

[PanamaPattie]

Really! When someone asks for your name - tell them. 🙄

[diddl]

@chiangmai

Folks should never assume there named in someones will even if they make reference to it. My mother was told by her brother that she was getting his house and money as his other siblings didnt need the money. She was the poorest out of them all and had a great relationship with him. She was a widow young too. So when he died she was very upset to find he hadnt changed his will for years and her two other siblings were the executors. Money split between the three and his house sold.

So it was an equal split & she was upset?

Why?

Unless he was nc with the other siblings I can't see why she would give any credence to him giving her everything & them nothing.

[Okbussitout]

Yeah he should call back or perhaps you could if it's upsetting? It does seem odd that his grandad would talk about him being in the will but then leave him out.

[MummypigDaddypig]

Iv emailed the solicitor.

He panicked, he absolutely hates phoning anyone

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe]

I think granddad was very wrong to discuss the terms of his will, it was almost like playing with the family and setting them against each other. He should never have commented on leaving people out of it to other interested parties either. That's really crass.

The situation will be resolved with an appointment with the solicitor to clarify whether your husband has been left anything or not.

He and grandfather might have been close - but grandfather may well have been closer to his child(ren). Finding out the terms will give closure.

[rawalpindithelabrador]

I was disowned for moving away from my home area and refusing to move back. Oh, well. It stung at first but then I thought, well, it's their money, they can do what they want with it and learned to detach myself from it all. I don't have a very close relationship with my mother or especially with my sister, who is very tit-for-tat. They haven't answered any of my messages for a couple of weeks now. Apparently, my father made mention of some personal effects that may have been for my kids but I've yet to hear of them and never told my son so that's that.

I'd not even bother pushing it, tbh.

[MummypigDaddypig]

I think because he said “I’m ringing regarding my grandad ” he thinks that the solicitor would know even if the surname wasn’t the same that it would be him?

[Bluntness100]

Usually a will states the relationship of the beneficiary and not just the name. Surnames change all the time - grandchildren get married etc so I don't think the confusion of over the name would happen

It’s not that simple. Because wills don’t contain every child and grandchild. They name certain ones.

So you can have three children, it can be you pass all to one child in your will, the other two won’t be mentioned. So the relationship is not relevant, if it says I leave everything to my grandson. Joe brown. Because if someone else phones up and says I’m also a grandson ans my name is joe green, they won’t assume it’s the same person because the first name is the same.

If you change your name you’d say it’s joe brown, formerly green.

Although I also suspect he’s not in thr will, the fact remains there could be some confusion.

He can email to be 100 percent sure, if he can’t manage a phone call.

[MummypigDaddypig]

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

I think granddad was very wrong to discuss the terms of his will, it was almost like playing with the family and setting them against each other. He should never have commented on leaving people out of it to other interested parties either. That's really crass.

The situation will be resolved with an appointment with the solicitor to clarify whether your husband has been left anything or not.

He and grandfather might have been close - but grandfather may well have been closer to his child(ren). Finding out the terms will give closure.

Sadly he wasn’t close to MIL, which is why Dh spent most of his time with him- he was quite neglected by mil.

[Bluntness100]

@MummypigDaddypig

I think because he said “I’m ringing regarding my grandad **” he thinks that the solicitor would know even if the surname wasn’t the same that it would be him?

Well no, of course not, grand dad could have had many grandkids the solicitor didn’t know about. They are just reading what’s in the will.

[rawalpindithelabrador]

@chiangmai

Folks should never assume there named in someones will even if they make reference to it. My mother was told by her brother that she was getting his house and money as his other siblings didnt need the money. She was the poorest out of them all and had a great relationship with him. She was a widow young too. So when he died she was very upset to find he hadnt changed his will for years and her two other siblings were the executors. Money split between the three and his house sold.

Indeed! It can end up with a lot of hurt. SIL is under the assumption the estate of their surviving parent will be split, but I made it clear to her, they all know BIL is the golden child, and not to expect anything.