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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Removing shoes indoors

615 replies

diagold4u · 04/03/2021 15:35

Am interested to know how many people actually have the rule of no shoes indoors.
We've had this rule from when I was young and have carried it on when I moved out. I think it makes sense not to walk all over the house with shoes that have been worn outdoors, who knows what you've stood on and then bringing all that in to your home.
I have shoe covers that I provide to workers.
Especially with young children I think it's even more important not to wear outdoor shoes indoor, carpets/rug will harbour all that dirt no matter how much you Hoover up.

My actual aibu is, if someone came to my house as a guest would it be U for me to ask them to remove their shoes? Obviously in a polite manner.
I feel quite embarrassed having to ask when these people already know.
My current house is all flooring with large rugs everywhere, the main living room is carpet.
I've noticed certain extended family members get annoyed at my request but the way I see it, it's my house, if I don't walk with shoes, why should you when you've chosen to come to my house.

OP posts:
Santosug · 04/03/2021 16:52

Shoes off at my house, when I've had workmen in they've always brought the cover on things.
In someone else's house I'd just ask and do what they preferred.

rainbowrainfall · 04/03/2021 16:54

Shoes off always. I have young children so the idea of walking on the carpets with outdoor shoes is grim.
My MIL strongly disagrees with our shoes off policy, to the point she refuses to come to our house.

I hate walking around in bare feet. I keep fluffy slipper socks in handbags/children's changing bags to use at other peoples houses.

pinpong · 04/03/2021 16:56

I ask for shoes off when they walk in and the people that come to my house respect my rules. When I go to other people's house, I ask before I enter.

EmpressSuiko · 04/03/2021 16:58

Shoes off and yes I ask family/friends to remove them when they visit. I don’t understand why people keep their shoes on, it’s so unsanitary!

RaidersoftheLostAardvark · 04/03/2021 17:00

Depends on the guest- workman I wouldn't as they will be in & out for tools & need to protect themselves from accidental injury, elderly relative who is unsteady on their feet can keep their's on, everyone else shoes off- but I do feel awkward asking visitors & most of our public rooms have floor boards so I'm not that fussed

Glitterblue · 04/03/2021 17:01

I can't stand shoes in the house. We were brought up in a no shoes house and I continued it when I got my own place. I don't like the thought of trailing dirt into our nice light carpets, plus I couldn't relax if I had my shoes on in the house. Most people take their shoes off anyway when they come here but I wouldn't feel comfortable asking people to do it.

happysunr1se · 04/03/2021 17:01

Shoes off at the front door in my house.

I have multiple Ikea slippers in small and large size for guests kept in basket by front door.

The only Shoes On household's I know have dogs (who they let on the sofas and 1 couple let the dog in their bed) so their floors are often dirty.

I am happy to wear my shoes inside their houses, but mostly I remember to take spare slippers - but not my main slippers, cos I don't want them to get dog fluff and dirt on them ;)

RampantIvy · 04/03/2021 17:01

This comes up regularly on MN. We are rural. There is mud everywhere round here at the moment.

Everyone I know removes their shoes indoors regardless of whether they have carpet or hard floors. It's just the done thing round here. I don't ask people to remove theirs because they do anyway, and I wouldn't ask if someone didn't, unless their shoes were covered in mud, because I don't think it is polite to ask.

I prefer to wear slippers indoors anyway as they are more comfortable. When I visit other houses I always ask if they want me to take my shoes off if it isn't obvious.

User1511 · 04/03/2021 17:06

I’m with you. My in laws don’t get it.

They’d make a big deal about removing them at my request, bring slippers and the like. And then when they left, sit in the lounge to put their shoes on and walk through the house to leave 🙄

FreysGrumble · 04/03/2021 17:07

I'm not the fussed about shoes on or off.

However I do have a board by the door for me to put wet/muddy shoes on if needs be. Its normally empty as I put my shows away once they are dry/clean and I've noticed that when guests come round and see the board they automatically seem to take their shoes off and put them on.

So if you don't want to outright ask people can always try something like that as a silent hint

stayathomer · 04/03/2021 17:07

We take ours off but I'd never ask someone, if they see ours off and take them off great, if they leave them on should you not just suck it up for that day?

LabiaMinoraPissusFlapus · 04/03/2021 17:09

I find it so rude when people march into my house with their shoes on that I do ask them to remove them. I know people think I am rude but I think they are the rude ones!

Floralnomad · 04/03/2021 17:09

None of the people who actually live here wear shoes indoors and some of my guests take them off but I don’t ask those that don’t to do so and we are all wood floors downstairs anyway and we generally don’t have guests upstairs .

A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 · 04/03/2021 17:10

Shoes off house here, but never ask guests to. The living area is wood or tile, so we can vacuum and mop after they've been.

I think the shoes off is driven by me, partner does it for an easy life. Always take my shoes off in other peoples homes also

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 04/03/2021 17:11

I hate shoes in the house. Shoes are there to protect your feet from the elements and are completely unnecessary indoors.if you are cold there are nice clean soft slippers.

BreakfastOfWaffles · 04/03/2021 17:12

We are a shoes off house and 99% of our visitors are too so would just remove them automatically. The only exception is my FIL who struggles with his mobility so it isn't really convenient for him to take his shoes off. I would definitely ask, though, if someone didn't pick up on the cue to take theirs off.

ncforthecrohnystuff · 04/03/2021 17:13

When we had carpets, friends kept their shoes on. One always said, I know you like shoes off but I have smelly feet. We changed to flooring, it is much easier to clean, but then everyone removed shoes when they visited.

My family, always take our shoes off in the porch and I do at others' houses.

SageMist · 04/03/2021 17:14

I can't get worked up about this at all. I don't mind if I'm asked to remove my shoes in someone else's house. I don't mind if someone removes their shoes if they want when they come into my house.
I mostly do wear slippers in my house but only because they are generally more comfy than shoes. Having said that I've spent all day in my walking boots after going out for a walk this morning, I just forgot to take them off. No big deal though.

LemonCrab · 04/03/2021 17:15

Me 100%. There are two mats and a shoe roach at my front door. It couldn't be clearer than I expect people to remove their shoes when they arrive.

And I always do the same in people's houses. I can't think of a house I've been to where people haven't done the same?

LemonCrab · 04/03/2021 17:16

*shoe rack

ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt · 04/03/2021 17:17

I keep my shoes on in my house. Our children and any visiting children have to take them off (7 dog shitty shoe experiences in 4 months taught me kids can't be trusted to know if they've stepped in it!)
My friend who normally takes her shoes off in her own house also does at mine. I take my shoes off at her house too. It's rude not to and I am never offended to be asked.

I'm happy to go with the flow. If I'm visiting someone and I'm not sure of their preferences I will ask. I just like my own shoes on in my own house cos I'm not a slipper fan. I do have an outside bristle mat, and indoor stiff mat and then a runner so by the time I'm all the way in my house, my shoes are thoroughly wiped.

My mum's house is a "no shoes inside" house. I do ignore this as she's a filthy sod and her carpets and sticky kitchen Lino have more muck on than her farmyard. It's one of those houses where I say you wipe your feet on the way out rather than the way in. She's just delusional.

blowinahoolie · 04/03/2021 17:17

No shoes worn in bedrooms, but downstairs is fair game.

DynamoKev · 04/03/2021 17:18

@diagold4u
Do you have a toilet brush?

MsHedgehog · 04/03/2021 17:21

I grew up not wearing shoes indoors. DH did. Before we moved in together, DH was very much against the idea of not wearing shoes indoors - as in he felt VERY strongly about it so I thought we may end up having a bit of an issue.

He now advocates no shoes indoors more than me and will point out if I've quickly rushed in with my shoes on!

That said, we never tell anyone else to take their shoes off. The majority of people will take it off without us saying a word, as they can see we have no shoes on, but if anyone doesn't, we leave them to it.

megletsecond · 04/03/2021 17:22

Shoes off here. Hard floors.

I don't want spit and dog poo walked around my house.

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