Man asks his tinder date for a refund on what he spent, when she rejected him after the third date. Was he right or wrong?

[littlepattilou]

As in the title really... A man dated a woman he met on Tinder, and paid for the 'refreshments' on all 3 dates. When she dumped him after the third date, he messaged her and told her she owed him for what he spent on her!

So.... Was he right to do this?

YANBU for yes he had the right to ask.

YABU for no, he should not be asking.

www.mirror.co.uk/lifestyle/sex-relationships/relationships/man-asks-woman-25-refund-23584365

Why did he even get a second date? This is why you always go Dutch (and not just offer once to be polite ...)

I think he confused date and prostitute.

Imo people should pay their own way on dates either half each or take turns and he could have suggested that at the time.

But no. He's not owed a refund. He wasn't buying access to her body with drinks.

So, she was right to refuse more dates with him. If he wanted to exchange money for a guaranteed shag then he should have gone to a prostitute. Dating, regardless of how many you have been on, does not entitle anyone to sex. There's probably a reason why he is/was single. Entitled arsehole.

He's being ridiculous, let alone mean. DH had a single tight-fisted colleague who used to moan that all women were interested in was his money. DH, being a practical-minded man tried to convince him that 'you have to invest to gain success' or suchlike, to no avail. He's probably still moaning about being single.

you have to invest to gain success this mantra is the problem though. Spend enough mate and she'll drop her knickers for you

He paid for the coffee / meal so they could have a coffee / meal together. He wasn't paying HER for the refreshments, he was paying the cafe owner.
If he thinks sex is a financial negotiation I imagine he isn't a very generous lover. However, I amusing myself with the scenario that he went on to "give her" sex.

"I spent 30 minutes on foreplay, so you owe me a mid range pasta or pizza. I can lick you into multiple orgasms, but then you'll need to take me to a steakhouse".

Well at least we all know why she dumped him if they got to the end of the third date and he went "I've spent X on you, now drop yer knickers love."
What a catch.

I think that dates do cost alot of money, 3 dates = meals. It Is expensive. I think it's best just to meet up for a walk, hot drinks rather than a full blown meal. Get to know each other. If it all goes well after 3/4 dates then push the boat out for a meal. I dont think anyone should ask for half the meal costs back afterwards. It should have been agreed at the time, which is fine. But afterwards smacks of, you didn't sleep with me so I want x back! Bit childish really.

He wanted $35 - her half. So $70 for the two of them, $23 per date, about £16.50 between them.

That's coffee and cake, a drink perhaps!

@Love51

He paid for the coffee / meal so they could have a coffee / meal together. He wasn't paying HER for the refreshments, he was paying the cafe owner. If he thinks sex is a financial negotiation I imagine he isn't a very generous lover. However, I amusing myself with the scenario that he went on to "give her" sex.

"I spent 30 minutes on foreplay, so you owe me a mid range pasta or pizza. I can lick you into multiple orgasms, but then you'll need to take me to a steakhouse".

Hell, if that was the going rate, DP would get steak every night.

You misunderstand me, SleepingStandingUp, DH didn't mean it quite like that! He meant that in the old-fashioned sense if you want to impress a lady then you have to be prepared to splash out a bit. After a few dates a relationship will hopefully develop if you have enough in common, etc and then you go from there.

If she offered to pay halves at the time and he refused to accept it, he should just swallow his loss.

If she was happy for him to pay and was leading him on to get a free meal, she's just as bad as he is.

@TakeTheCuntOutOfScunthorpe

If she offered to pay halves at the time and he refused to accept it, he should just swallow his loss.

If she was happy for him to pay and was leading him on to get a free meal, she's just as bad as he is.

Maybe read any one of the arrticles on it! Or posts that explain what is in the article in the OP!

Then you'd know which of those scenarios is as described!