to think this woman behaved like a snotty cow and there was no need for this?

[Lludmilla]

This has really annoyed me and I thought I’d canvas some opinions.

Just been out in my car, mainly to keep it ticking over so the battery doesn’t go flat, which tends to happen now I’m wfh. Part of my route took me along narrow country roads - no footpath or even a verge in places.

So I’m approaching a hump-backed bridge, with one car in front of me. Couple coming towards me on foot, pushing a double buggy. I thought to myself, surely that’s a little risky on narrow/pavement-less roads like this (being as there are always people around who drive like arseholes), but didn’t make eye contact with them or take any further notice of them. One car in front of me, starting to swing clear of the couple with the buggy, I started to do the same. So far, no problem.

Then a car appeared coming over the h-b bridge in the opposite direction forcing traffic going my way to start reversing. At which point I sighed and muttered something to myself, not because anyone was doing anything wrong but because I’d already had a few tricky ‘passing’ scenarios on the same journey, and I was beginning to regret taking a ‘rural’ route so to speak.

Again, no attention paid to the couple, who were passing my car by now, I wasn’t sighing or muttering at them, I was just frustrated in general.

Then the car in front of me started reversing rather too quickly, to the point where I had to sound my horn in warning as there was a real chance they’d hit me before I had chance to start reversing myself.

The reversing car stopped and I looked over my shoulder before starting to reverse.

At which point I became aware that Buggy Lady had turned around and was staring in the direction of my car and gesticulating with an angry look on her face, clearly assuming I’d sounded my horn at her. Didn’t engage in any way, but as I was waiting for the car coming the other way to pass, I could see through my rear-view mirror as she eventually turned back the way she was going, walking very huffily from what I could tell (her ponytail was swinging like mad, if that doesn’t sound too odd ) for a few steps, then turned back around again and made one of those ‘arms in the air’ gestures, again with a really snotty look on her face.

I mean, WTF?! I can't imagine why she'd have done that other than because she assumed I was sounding my horn at her. And if she did, then she was COMPLETELY BLOODY WRONG - defensive much??!

So:

1. AIBU to think it wasn’t the safest place to be pushing a double buggy in the first place, and that they’d have been better taking their walk somewhere there was a pavement or at least a verge?

and:

1. AIBU to think she behaved like an OTT arsehole with all the looking and the gestures and the conclusion-jumping when I wasn’t even concerning myself with her but with the actual traffic on the actual road???

No vote as it’s a double AIBU, so to speak.

[WorraLiberty]

@RogerBannister

You are being unreasonable simply for using the ridiculous and non-sensical ‘defensive much??!’ phrase as I’m assuming you are an adult and not a sulky 14 year old.

Or we could turn that around and say you are being unreasonable for letting the way others speak irritate you enough to make that post.

Part of being over the age of 14 is accepting that some people say things differently to you.

[lioncitygirl]

You’re looking for more reasons to be annoyed. If you really felt you were in the right - why have you come here to get the affirmation you have? Let it go. She looked at you funny, didn’t say anything to you but you’ve taken offence. You do actually even know she was angry/annoyed at you. You’ve assumed.

[sneakypetesgrandmaisace]

I am really surprised that you've assumed she thought you were beeping at her. I think it is much much more likely that your horn either scared or woke her children and thought that would be obvious.

You were obviously right to beep your horn to avoid a collision, and that's the risk she took by walking on the road, but I can understand why she'd be annoyed in the heat of the moment and possibly not thinking rationally. I remember when my baby was a very difficult sleeper and I used to get annoyed (to myself) even if a motorbike passed loudly and woke him. It was irrational, but I don't think it makes me or her snotty!! That's just an unkind thing to say.

[Cherrysherbet]

This is something I would have let go 2 mins down the road.

We’re meant to be staying at home, not driving round the countryside on non essential journeys.

Buggy lady was having her daily exercise.

[kindlyensure]

You should have absolutely made eye-contact with them and acknowledged them and slowed down or stopped until they had passed and then raised your hand in acknowledgment and they would have raised their hand in thanks and there would have been only perky cheery ponytail swinging and not aggressive snotty swinging.

You were deffo in the wrong for sure for ignoring them.

You can turn your engine over without driving the car anywhere.

[BottleFlipper]

@Lludmilla

You’re very snappy OP.

A lot of constructive remarks have been made on here, and that's fine - I can take criticism - but some offensive and incorrect assumptions have been made on here as well, and yes, that does make me feel irritated.

And a bit snotty...

[Youllbeoldertoo]

Non issue. Move on.

[Keepcountingyourfingers]

The main thing you should have made a point of doing was making eye contact with the pram pushers, so they knew you’d seen them, and you knew they’d seen you.

[SmileyClare]

The buggy was unfortunately just passing your car when you beeped.

If you kneel down outside a car and listen to the horn, it's incredibly loud. I agree with others, that is what she was annoyed about.

Next time, hang back with more room behind the car in front on the bridge in case it starts reversing?

Put it behind you now Op

[justletmeadoreyou]

@MissMoan

I would just let this one go.

I don’t think I could. I’d have to ring 111 and report the aggressive pony tail swinging...

[poppycat10]

It is very annoying when people sound their horns and you are a pedestrian in the area, you don't know why they're sounding the horn - is it you, another car, are they just saying hello to someone?

But sometimes you just need to beep your horn in warning - and then it's tough. I think the woman was in the wrong, she should have read the road and used her noddle.

[poppycat10]

8Next time, hang back with more room behind the car in front on the bridge in case it starts reversing*

well how much space do you suggest the OP gives? 5m? 10m? Some people just reverse without looking.

[imalmostthere]

You have been really snappy on this thread- and quite rude.
Whilst muttering to yourself, the woman probably noticed you huffing and puffing and assumed it was at her. In fairness I can usually tell if someone is annoyed from their expression, rather than how much their hair swings 😬
You've no evidence of where she lives, and even if she drove there, so did you!
If you don't want a difficult drive, don't drive in country lanes. She can walk where she likes, you can drive where you like, but if you're going to get this worked up about it, I suggest you find another route.

[Soontobe60]

@Lludmilla

OP, I also think YABU calling a woman a ‘snotty cow’.

Even though she was behaving like one? What term would you have preferred?

Calling any female a ‘cow’ instantly makes you the lesser person in the discussion. The language we choose to use, and in particular the insults we choose to use, speak volumes about the sort of values we hold.
A cow is a 4 legged animal that provides humans with beef and dairy. Was that what she was doing?

[Soontobe60]

Oh, and your opening comments were all about the roads having no pavements. Did they suddenly build some between your first and last post?

[Windchangeface]

Roads are not designed for pedestrians with buggies. People walking on them shouldn’t really be that surprised by a car horn

Unless the council build adequate pavements then actually roads are shared equally between all users with those classed as ‘more vulnerable’ having a greater right of way.

When it comes to accidents there’s very few situations in which a car vs pedestrian situation won’t end in the car driver being held at fault. Pedestrians, cyclists and horse riders are ‘particularly vulnerable road users’ and a vehicle is technically classed as a ‘weapon’ if you hit one of them!

Roads are for access and travel between homes and services. There is a huge misconception that ‘those who pay road tax’ are paying for the roads and therefore more entitled to them.

Untrue Road tax does pay toward the upkeep and maintenance of roads but that’s directly because vehicles eligible for road tax cause significant wear and tear to roads (and pollution but that’s a separate issue).

A pedestrian, cyclist or horseback rider will cause less wear and tear to a road over an average year than a lorry driver will in a week!

[Soontobe60]

And another thing; you should not be making any unnecessary journeys. Yours was - a bit like Dominic Cumming’s excuse as to why he needed to drive to Barnard Castle to test his eyesight.

[MasterBeth]

Just learn to drive better and more patiently so you can anticipate potential problems and not get into a position where you’re approaching a hump-backed bridge on the wrong side of the road and need to reverse.

[Jackie2022]

Frankly your journey was non essential under lockdown guidance, so you shouldn’t have been on the road regardless. It all boils down to you being in the wrong. You wouldn’t have come across any of these people had you not been making a pointless journey.

[Strugglingtodomybest]

If someone beeped their horn just as I was walking past their car I'd probably jump out of my skin. I think you scared her and that's why she reacted like she did.

I also think that she can walk wherever she wants. No, narrow lanes with a double buggy aren't ideal, but that's life for some people.

[Dopeyduck]

You probs woke the baby up and she’s lost it in frustration / sleep deprivation. We’ve all been there. Be kind.

[SmileyClare]

@Strugglingtodomybest

If someone beeped their horn just as I was walking past their car I'd probably jump out of my skin. I think you scared her and that's why she reacted like she did.

I also think that she can walk wherever she wants. No, narrow lanes with a double buggy aren't ideal, but that's life for some people.

Completely agree with this.

Op I think you're over reacting to some Angry gesticulation ; calling her a "snotty cow" and an "OTT arsehole"

I'm not sure why this woman making a face and waving has made you so angry. I suppose just accept that lockdown frustration is affecting everyone (including you).

[Cam2020]

That sounds like a dangerous place to be walking with a double buggy in the first place!

Sounds like a stressful siutsution all round.

[ImFree2doasiwant]

OP I'd put money on her being sleep deprived with a non sleeping baby that had finally dropped off.

[Livelovebehappy]

Totally bonkers pushing a double buggy on a road with no obvious path.