To have this theory about parenthood?

[Spagootiba]

To think that as children grow older parents are biologically programmed to forget about the sleepless nights, tantrums etc or at least how awful it felt at the time.

My theory is that it's a type of evolution so they can tell younger generations that parenthood isn't that bad and not scare them off reproducing, also explains more than one child 🤣

Light hearted but let's hear your views.

I'm fully prepared for perfect parents with perfect children brigade.

Ps I love my kids and obviously the good times outweigh the hard😅

What I've noticed is that those of my friends who started having children and wanted more than one 'forgot' about birth, newborn etc. I knew I was only having one and so I think I have allowed myself to remember the bad bits as it's helpful to keep my decision to only have one. TLDR - I think we edit our experiences to fit our plans.

16 years on, I completely remember how shit birth and the newborn stage was. I only went through it a second time because I was told I would need a section for subsequent births and I could see it all gets easier as they get older.

I have a really distinct memory of hobbling back alone from the toilet to my hospital bed after being unhooked from all the drips and catheter after having DC2. I felt about 100 years old and I hissed to myself 'I am never, ever doing this again!'

I haven't.

I am never this honest to people in real life though. Guess I don't want to put them off and they may well have a much better experience than me. DCs are 16 and 12 now and are amazing human beings. I am glad I stopped there.

@Whatafustercluck

There is only one bad memory i cannot shut down and it still brings me to tears. Dd was a few months old, waking every single hour and I hadn't slept for longer than an hour at a time for 3 solid weeks. One night she cried, and cried and cried for hours and there was absolutely no soothing her. At the end of my tether I sat there, held her to me and sobbed. I felt anger and frustration rising in me and began to feel myself holding her too tight to me. I quickly put her down in the middle of the bed, left her crying and left the room. She was crying there for 10 minutes. But had I stayed, I am so scared of what might have happened.

The day she vomited in my face? No problem! The day I licked what I thought was spilled calpol off ds's little chubby wrist and soon realised it was in fact snot? It's the making of dinner time tales.

There's not a second goes by when I regret having children. But my word, you see the world very differently after having them!

If it helps, in the country I live in the maternity nurses have to provide information/training on certain things before signing you off so to speak. One of the things was that if you are ever really stressed holding a baby thats been crying and crying for hours, put it down somewhere safe, leave the room and make a tea/drink and calm down before returning. So you did the right thing - and I think it shows your instincts to protect your child were strong and on point. I think a lot more mothers have reached that sort of crisis point than would ever admit to it.

Teen years are a horror. The school bullying, the worrying, their emotions, all of it. I have a toddler who is much harder work physically but so easy to fix.

Sometimes I think god they're so beautiful, I could do it again. But I couldn't, I'm weary and my bones hurt.

Teen years are a horror. The school bullying, the worrying, their emotions, all of it. I have a toddler who is much harder work physically but so easy to fix.

Oh god. 100% agree with this. Physically more draining with little ones. But the emotional complexity of parenting a teen (particularly girls)... it's something else isn't it.