AIBU to expect my husband to be able to make a cuppa the way that I like it?

[hermionieweasley]

We have been married for nearly two years, together for six, friends for eleven. AIBU to expect him to know how I like my cup of tea?
I like it the PROPER way - fresh water in kettle, tea bag in mug, water poured on as it's just boiled, wait 27 seconds (my childhood friend told me this when I was about six and have always done it lol), and then stir in two sugars and a dash of milk. Perfection.

Instead, I get watery milky horrible cups of tea, and never off his own back, only if I badger him for a cup. I caught him yday putting the milk in before the tea bag or the water

Yabu.

My husband never ever makes me tea or coffee. I like it a certain way, so I do it myself. Unreasonable to expect someone to learn your style or hot drink so rigidly!

I've even married over 30 years - my DH and I are very particular about how we like our coffee and tea (I don't drink tea, he doesn't drink coffee ), we just always make our own ... I don't like anyone making my coffee ... even at work I will happily make coffee for my team but don't want anyone to make coffee for me ... maybe I am a control freak

Yabu
When DH makes me my morning cup of tea he only stirs it 25 and a half times. The prick.

You'll always get horrible watery tea if you leave the bag in for on 27 seconds. Needs 3 minutes at least.

When office based I knew how 10+ people liked their tea/coffee. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect someone who loves you to learn the way you want your tea.

My DP can’t have dairy so I don’t give him dairy. I hate twice boiled water. After repeatedly throwing away the cup every time it wasn’t freshly boiled he finally gave in and conceded I could taste when it wasn’t fresh and now does it the way I like it.

Even I cant be arsed to make my own tea properly, often put the milk in first while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil. Teas tea, get it down ya!

YABU to talk about making tea the proper way and then make it in a mug.

The proper way involves a tea pot for a start.

I only like tea when I make it myself. As a result I make all the tea in my house unless someone is only making themselves one if they’re the only one about. Otherwise I just end up pouring mine away. I know I drive everyone mad but oh well.

I like mine properly bashed about but not left to stew. Dh pours the water on and leaves it for a few mins to soak bluerrghh and dd takes the tea bag out quickly but doesn’t bash it about properly so it’s too weak! I’m fussy.

My husband struggles to make me tea the way I like it. I've made it difficult for him by changing the way I like it over the 20 + years we have been married. As I've got older I've liked less and less milk, makes me feel sick! Yanbu but I probably am

My dp makes a nice cuppa, my son (11) does too. They make it how they like it tbh. I just make my own if I want a really nice fresh cuppa. Otherwise just happy to be made one. It’s a bit rubbish op, he wouldn’t just make you one of his own back & how you like it?...would he make one for himself?

I never drank tea or coffee until a few years ago so I never made them either. I never have coffee in the house as I don’t like it. My sister is the same, she rarely has a hot drink but her husband makes sure we are offered and I’m getting better. Though with covid and no inside visitors I’ve not had to.

@WaltzesWithSnobs

Yabu When DH makes me my morning cup of tea he only stirs it 25 and a half times. The prick.

Lol

My husband squeezes the tea bag😧

Does he drink tea?

Does he drink tea?

I think we're in the same track @Eleganz!

27 seconds and two sugars? YABU.

Well, with a teabag is not the proper way.

That said, it is essential in an enduring relationship that a husband knows hw to make tea in the way his spouse prefers. There’s few reasons I might ask for annulment of our marriage, but this would come high up on the list.

@countrygirl99

My husband squeezes the tea bag😧

I think we need to swap husbands. I want one that does this

@WaltzesWithSnobs

Yabu When DH makes me my morning cup of tea he only stirs it 25 and a half times. The prick.

Get your ducks in a row and LTB!

Ofc it’s not unreasonable, he’s your husband not a random at work or something. I like my tea a certain way and my OH makes it perfectly even though he has his differently, and I make his how he likes it too. Surely it’s just standard to make food or drinks for someone you live with how they like to eat or drink them?!

He likes bacon crispy, I don’t.. my DD likes a steak well done and I don’t... I don’t serve them food cooked to my preferences, that’s just lazy and a bit mean!

We don’t ever make hot drinks for each other as it causes full on arguments.

Tea should be loose leaf, not some shitty powder in a bag, I make my own premix with cinnamon, cardamom, nutmeg and cloves, it then needs heating on the stove for ten minutes. Heating, not boiling, aerate it with either a whisk or by ladeling and then gently strain directly into a large pot or cups, but serve straight away, you must never reheat.

Coffee should be ‘proper’ coffee and whisked with a small amount of sugar and almond mild, then the rest of the almond milk should be added to the whisked coffee.

He drinks pg tips and nescafe. Tea and coffee in the UK is generally quite poor and very expensive.

Mine makes it better than I do even though he doesn't drink tea! I don't know how he does it, but we have the opposite issue here, I always want him to make my tea because he does it better

YABVU...27 seconds is no way near long enough : ) 2-5 minutes, freshly boiled water and whole milk is the key.

DH and I recently celebrated our 21st wedding anniversary, together over 25 years. I still don't ask him to make me tea, as he is rubbish at it. (I don't ask DD (15) either as she likes it a lot stronger, and with a lot less milk, than me - and she does actually drink tea!).

YABU to call it proper tea at 27 seconds and with 2 sugars.

Not unreasonable to want a spouse to make an effort to make it as you like it, but you've married him now so I guess you're stuck?