Crap gifts

[Malbecqueen]

Having just seen another thread detailing valentine's day disappointments, I thought it'd be good/cathartic to list some really rubbish presents here...

This V day (we don't really celebrate it here), I got v cheap smellies for the bath, after told my DH (a) not to get me any more body creams etc some time ago and (b) my mum bought me enough bath oil to last me all year at Xmas...

At Xmas, I asked for a) a comfy lounge suit like the ones I had - and was clear that I wanted a zip top, no jumper/hoodie and loose/flared bottoms and b) a casual red check skirt ... he got me a cheap and scratchy lounge suit, no zip and elastic bottoms to the legs... and b) a brown dogtooth skirt that's more appropriate for the office (which is great in Covid times)....

And yes, I love my DH dearly but FFS I don't know how to say these things anymore clearly...

So c'mon on - hit me with your crappy/ thoughtless gifts.

I dated a guy at Uni who went on and on about Valentine's Day coming up etc and I said I wasn't too bothered but he was all no it's our first Valentine's it's important. Proper on and on -"three days til Valentine's!" Countdown every day etc. So against my better judgement I bought him some lovely gifts - boxers with hearts on, posh coffee, nice chocolates and a mug that said something mushy on it.
The day arrived and he didn't mention it at all until I gave him his present, he said oh ok thanks. Gave me mine - a packet of Haribo. He then said his friends had invited him out that evening to which j replied fine I've got plans with my friends anyway.

Went out with my friends and got a text from one of his mates saying how awful I was to have planned a night out with my friends on Valentine's and that boyfriend was really upset!!

Our relationship did not last much longer!

@gabsdot45

This last Christmas my MIL got me a purple, amithyst crystal penguin. Its big too, about 6" tall. It was such a weird, random gift and wrong for me I so many ways, I don't like purple, I don't especially like penguins and I don't like ornaments. It was like she didn't know me at all. It's in a bag in the car waiting for the charity shop to. Reopen.

PM me, I’ll buy it off you!! Love purple, crystals and penguins 😂

@Pumpkintopf

From my MIL - slipper mops. Literally slippers made up like mop heads so I could wash the floor with my feet. Also a car cleaning kit (different year).

Whaaat? Slipper mops are an awesome present! I’d wear them with my duster gloves 😂

My favourite story is not me but an ex-colleague. She had asked her DH for either a Cinderella carriage or Christmas tree Pandora charm for Christmas but he didn’t get her one. For her birthday in June he dropped hints that he’d got her the charm she wanted. She assumed it was the Cinderella one with it being June but no... it was the Christmas tree 😂

A work colleague had (and probably still has) a horrific BO problem. Every Christmas the Secret Santa would buy her strong deodorants and soap or other toiletries, her friends and family gave her toiletries.

One year she was really angry to open yet another deodorant set and was shouting about it and saying she had hundreds of them and why did everyone keep buying them for her because she never used them. One of the men just told her to her face that she stunk and asked why she wasn't using them.

I think the thoughtless gifts can sometimes be a hint that we aren't picking up on.

@PandemicAtTheDisco

A work colleague had (and probably still has) a horrific BO problem. Every Christmas the Secret Santa would buy her strong deodorants and soap or other toiletries, her friends and family gave her toiletries.

One year she was really angry to open yet another deodorant set and was shouting about it and saying she had hundreds of them and why did everyone keep buying them for her because she never used them. One of the men just told her to her face that she stunk and asked why she wasn't using them.

I think the thoughtless gifts can sometimes be a hint that we aren't picking up on.

Like the slipper mop! 😁

I have a friend who is a journalist and gets free junk from a baby/young child event she covers. Every year she makes a big deal about having a special present for our family and every year it's a freebie from the event. Remember the event is for babies/young children (3 and under) and my dc are all 11+. This year it was a gift "first game" for 2-4 year olds. Also this friend & family aren't short of a bob or two (or three). It's always because it's so ludicrous.

@SlipperTripper One year, my Godfather complained about cutting the grass, so was gifted a goat. Not in the charitable 'I'm buying a goat for a village in your name' sense. An actual baaaa-ing goat, with a bow, on Christmas morning.

Oh my God, what the heck did he do with the poor thing?!

my BIL and his gf, without fail, buy me a bottle of Prosecco at Christmas. Think £5 Asda bottle.

I hate Prosecco. The taste is awful.

So for the last three xmas's I've opened a bottle bag with the same bottle in. I go out and try to buy thoughtful presents for all the family and I never buy the same thing from last year.

My partner deals with his brothers present and I do most of others. So guess what the gf is gettin this Xmas? Asda's finest (£5) bottle of Prosecco.

I'm fed up of putting in effort for three years (that's how long BIL been with gf) with little thought coming back. I've been with the family for over 10 years.

I won't feel shit bout it either.

My Ex BF who was horribly tight got me at Christmas one year.. A Top Trumps Harry P thingie (Yes i like HP- but i was 42 at the time!!!!) he also got me a bin for my bedroom, and a small replica of a wheelie bin for reasons unknown.....He was planning to break up with me i later found out!!
Another ex lover from Holland bought me a 4 euro prepackaged slice of edam (he was Dutch) we hadnt seen each other for 3 months.. i dumped him
And another Ex bought me an electric carving knife for Christmas..gifts from previous years included high end jewellery/ holidays, he later went on to break up with me..