To ask your most crippling put down from a child?

[PunkyPirate]

My daughter stuck her head in my crotch area this evening when we were sat in the sofa, sniffed deeply then went "Agghhhh... Mummma!! You stink! You need to remember to wash your foof!!!"

I was mortified!!! Admittedly, it was day 3/4 of wearing the same jeans! 🙈😂

There are lots of items of clothing that don’t get washed after each wear. Tailored trousers that are dry clean only, jumpers, jackets? They’d be ruined.

Oh god, my 4 year old regularly greets me when I pick him up from nursery with

“Hello big squishy tummy!”

and, sometimes if I’m really lucky, he’ll ask apropos of nothing

“How did you get such a big tummy and bottom”

(I’m a size 14).

He also HATES leg hair, and will tell me to “do that thing with the stick that makes your legs not rough and spiky”

Patriarchal value systems manifest in a 4 year old. And I’m a single mother! Extraordinary.

@Sheleg

When I read threads like this I can't believe what some parents will put up with. If my child dared to say anything as rude as some of these, she would be very firmly reprimanded.

Exactly. Also why would you allow your child to sniff your crotch

I was shopping in the supermarket with my four year old son. A woman rushed past with a trolley and my son was suddenly hopping on one foot and whimpering. I didn't initially realise what had happened. After about 30 seconds he got the foot back on the floor and he was off. I ran after him. He stalked up to this woman, stared her straight in the eye and said, "You ran your trolley over my foot and you hurt me, and you didn't even say sorry". This woman blushed from head to toe and managed to blurt out out "sorry". I imagine she felt rather bad that she, a woman in her fifties, was being taught a lesson in manners from an indignant four year old.

@Sheleg

When I read threads like this I can't believe what some parents will put up with. If my child dared to say anything as rude as some of these, she would be very firmly reprimanded.

How can you when they probably learned this from their parents?

It’s clear from this thread that children can say cutting things without meaning to. However adults are deliberately arseholes. Certain posters could have phrased things politely (having the cog stove ability as an adult) however chose to be as crass and rude as possible.

Kids don't make these things up generally - they hear it from others and repeat.

Best so far was a drawing from my 5 year old nephew of me heavily pregnant. I was basically a beach ball

@MrsCods

The other day my 11 year old said 'no wonder your own mother abandoned you'

That’s awful

Last week I shaved my legs for the first time in a while (you know, lockdown and all...)

My two year old stroked them and went "ooooh, pretty legs, mummy". It was a compliment but I felt shamed that the difference was so obvious (and preferred!) 😂

My 3 year old

‘Mummy, why have you got arms like a man’
‘What do you mean?’
‘All that hair sticking out, can you get rid of it? I don’t like it’

@Sparklfairy

Anyone here that thinks wearing jeans for 3-4 days is rank, do you wash them after just one wear?

If so, please make sure henceforth you never ever post something judgy about another posters choices such as disposable nappies or wipes, driving a 4x4 or having 67 children as 'bad for the environment'

For me it’s not the repeated wearing of the jeans it’s the stinky fanny that makes me feel 🤢

@Trinacham

My niece telling me I smelt like cats. This was a few years ago now. I think she was just looking for a reaction but I do have 2 cats so it did make me worried that I actually do!!

Sorry to tell you this, but if you have animals in the house particularly dogs and cats. You will smell like them.

DS aged about 6 on a family walk, trotted up to me and said, pleasantly enough, "mum, your bum is like a horse's bum". God I loved that phase.

Pregnant with my 2nd child at 40 and my nephew kindly told me that pregnancy didn't suit me, I just looked old and fat. This was 7 years ago and it's always stuck in my head.

@Nancylovesthecock you were obviously one of these children whose parents didn't reprimand them for saying awful things to people.

To be fair if the smell from your crotch is penetrating out of your jeans then that would be a sign that washing them every 4th wear isn’t frequent enough. Denim is thick, you shouldn’t be able to smell your genitals through it. She isn’t shaming her, she is giving her opinion of the information provided in the OP.

I took my nose stud out a couple of year’s ago and asked my granddaughters if they could see anything different about me, after a bit of scrutiny the 10 year old said oh I know you’ve got more wrinkles

My son, then about 4, saw me getting out of the shower and exclaimed, “oh mama, you look just like a sea monster!” To make it worse he absolutely meant it as a compliment. He must have just seen this huge glistening body rearing up...Jesus. It killed me.

I cried laughing at this

“When I smack your bottom Mummy it jiggles for aaaages. I shall call you Sergeant Saiasge”

DS 9yo, looking over my shoulder at my phone as I'm texting;

"Mummy, who is Michael"

"He's my friend from work"

"Since when do you have friends, Mum?"

He has a point to be fair, I'm pretty antisocial

www.levi.com/US/en_US/blog/article/the-definitive-guide-to-denim/

According to the Levi website jeans should be washed after 10 wears or more - even better to wear until they start to smell ‘funky’

DS, aged about 9, was having a chat with DH about Lamborghinis. DH told him that if he works hard at school, and gets a good job or runs his own business, then one day he could buy a Lamborghini.
DS turned to DH and asked “so why haven’t you got one then, that didn’t work for you, did it?”

Both is these were years ago, he’s 17 now and knows better.

Of my new cardigan, over the dinner table - ‘mummy, when you button your cardigan up
like that, you look like a granny’. I checked this in the mirror afterwards and simply gave thanks that he hadn’t seen Mrs Doubtfire.

Around the same time, on the school run, late as ever. ‘Mummy? When your hair is all wet like that, you look like Gollum’. Again, I could see what he was getting at.

My eldest as he got off the school bus once boomed at the top of his voice “MUM WHAT’S THAT WHITE STRIPE ON YOUR HEAD” gee thanks son, I already worked out I needed my roots done.

My youngest once said to me “mum, you’ve got a big bum”, I told him that wasn’t very nice, he looked puzzled and said “no but it’s true mum, you really do”

@Stovetopespresso

are you the judge of smelly fannies is it like an inspection service you run???

What the fuck?

It wasn't me that 'judged' it, it was the OP child