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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Family of 4 in 2 bedroom flat.

80 replies

JessicaH1 · 02/02/2021 19:06

Hi all, sorry if this is posted in the wrong place, i wasn't sure where to post. Baby number 2 is on its way in a couple of months and myself , parter & toddler all live in a small 2 bed flat. Any advice from people in similar situations on how to make this work long term? I feel like we are going to be cramped, but dont really have any options for moving as its (morgaged) and super cheap for us.

OP posts:
Bluetonic41 · 02/02/2021 19:32

Baby in a cot with you until 6 months then bunk beds in the room with your toddler, you don't have much other choice surely!

clockwatcher247 · 02/02/2021 19:36

What other rooms do you have and what sizes are they (not in ft and in, just big, medium or small).

SabrinaMorningstar · 02/02/2021 19:37

That doesn't sound cramped. It's not even that unusual as PP said baby in with you for first 6 months then baby and toddler share a room. Or if toddler's room can't fit a cot, keep baby in with you for longer and move when they can go into a bottom bunk.
I shared a room with my siblings when I was little. It's fine. Don't worry about it Flowers

Original poster
JessicaH1 · 02/02/2021 19:40

Our room is medium sized, toddlers room, fairly small

OP posts:
daisyjgrey · 02/02/2021 19:42

Baby in your room for a while, then when the kids are old enough to share I'd switch rooms if your bed fits.

I switched with my daughter to the smaller room, she plays in hers and spends time there, I don't so it made sense for her to have the bigger room.

sleepyhead · 02/02/2021 19:42

Make sure you're making the most of vertical space for storage etc.

Children are very adaptable and accepting so dont worry about them beimg in together. It'll be they're normal and completely fine.

Bunkbeds are a good way of making a bit of personal space as well as space saving.

If you've got the ceiling height you might want to consider a double loft bed for yourself if it would mean you being able to take the smaller room.

Glitterinthegrey · 02/02/2021 19:42

We lived in a two bedroom flat with our girls until they were 5 and 11. We hadn't planned to, but issues with a short lease meant we couldn't move as soon as we would have hoped.

As pp has said, baby in with you in cot for 6 months, then bunks after that. Ours were supposed to do that, but our youngest actually slept in our bed mostly anyway (but that's a whole other thread).

If space allows, you could swap rooms to give the children the bigger room, or if you've got an extra space like a dining room or an extra big living room, you could create a bedroom for yourselves there so the children get their own. But sharing does them no harm, especially when they are tiny.

Blondeshavemorefun · 02/02/2021 19:43

Many children share. How big is room. Can you get single bed and /2beds cot /on the floor or will you need bunk beds

Pathetic32 · 02/02/2021 19:45

No advice but sympathy. We are also in a small 2 bed (500sq ft, no outdoor space). Me, DH, 5yo DS. 2nd bedroom is not that small but it's a weird shape so v difficult to fit an actual single bed in there - DS currently has a special bed which we fold out every night but we definitely couldn't fit a second child in there. Only possible option for us if we had a second would be using living room as a bedroom. But then we'd have no living room.

It's why we've only got one child. Gutted but can't do anything about it.

Imapotato · 02/02/2021 19:45

Bunk beds once the kids are old enough. Storage boxes under the bunk beds. Those square units you can get from IKEA which you put the big fabric boxes in are good to store lots of toys.

We lived in a tiny two bed house until dds were 9 and 6. We managed, it helped that where we lived was lovely, and it was super cheap. Our house now is much bigger, but the area isn’t as nice and it’s a lot more expensive.

BMW6 · 02/02/2021 19:45

2 adults and 2 kids in a 2 bedroom flat is cramped??????

Am I missing something?

qalb · 02/02/2021 19:47

We’re currently saving for a house deposit and are a family of five in a two bed flat. Two children in the main bedroom, baby in the other. We have a sofa bed. It works well for us for now but won’t be a long term thing.

Our two eldest children have always shared and we have LOTS of floor to ceiling storage which helps a lot space wise. I would say invest in some fitted cupboards as in the evenings you can shove put everything away and there’s no clutter everywhere.

MissMarpleDarling · 02/02/2021 19:49

I get you OP there used to be just me and 1 child in a 2 bed flat and I felt like the walls were closing in. Baby with you then switch rooms so kids have the biggest.

x2boys · 02/02/2021 19:51

Do you have storage space ? We lived in a two bedroom flat untill Ds1 was six and Ds2 3 very little storage space so tbh it was cramped ,we now have a two bedroom house but loads of storage space and our own Garden still a small house but you adapt

Original poster
JessicaH1 · 02/02/2021 19:52

Our flat is about 470sqf , the bedrooms are normal rectangulad shapes so youl be able to fit bunk beds , or swap rooms around. We have a nice sized living room which also has the dining table in too. We have the worlds tiniest kitchen.

OP posts:
Nohomeschoolingtoday · 02/02/2021 19:52

We had baby in with us till she was around 10 months and then switched rooms - the 2nd bedroom only fitted a double bed! Was tiny! But it meant we used our old bedroom with cot and bed and used the wardrobe space in there. It was cosy but meant we could save for bigger place.

MaizeBlouse · 02/02/2021 19:54

We are a family of 4 in a 2 bed that is 600 sq ft. It was what we could afford in the area we liked and was best for DPs work so we went for it.

My main tips are:

Seriously limit what you bring in to the flat. I know this sounds obvious but you have to really think 'do I need this in my life?!'about basically everything, including the kids' toys. My wider family all live in normal houses (not in London) and don't understand me at all when I ask them not to buy stuff for our house, we literally don't have the space!

Vertical storage wherever you can. Our hallway has a big shelving system on it where basically all the crap lives. We built in a big wardrobe in our bedroom and this helps too.

Tidy often. You can shut a door on mess in a small place!

I cosleep with the baby and older kid is in his own room. But his bed has a pullout underneath which will be the babies when he gets bigger.

Congrats OP!

Princessbanana · 02/02/2021 19:54

first of all you need good storage solutions, so dont let the place get cluttered, everything has a place of its own to go. for the first year or so the baby will be in your room and would suggest saving up for a nice set of bunkbeds, maybe handmade to fit the size of the room. i would do a massive clear out before the baby gets here, just so you are not lifting up stuff that your toddler has pulled out but never gets used! we have a storage unit with boxes in it, they come in a different sizes and they are a life saver, i would recommend one for every room!

zeddybrek · 02/02/2021 19:55

We had this and did things a bit differently.

DH and toddler slept in the same room in king bed. They both slept better and didn't disturb each other. So at least 2 were getting a full night's sleep.

I had the second smaller room with DC2 who was up in the night and I could do night feeds without waking anyone else up.

x2boys · 02/02/2021 19:56

Yes my kitchen in the flat was tiny it was off the lounge under an arch and there was no space at all ,do you have a Garden ?

alexdgr8 · 02/02/2021 19:56

when i was young small children often shared a single bed, top to tail. i think that would be safer until they are a little older, then they can use bunk beds. or share a double bed.
i;m sure you will work it out, OP. good luck.

Oysterbabe · 02/02/2021 19:56

Do you know the sex of your baby?

JohnLapsleyParlabane · 02/02/2021 19:56

We have bunk beds for our two, only the bottom bunk is a floor bed and the top one is at cabin bed level. The steps are actually storage boxes.
We put them in whilst I was expecting DS and DD was 3.9.
DS is nearly two and they're still working well for us.
We did have to be perhaps a little more careful letting him play in their room but he learned very quickly that if he went up the steps he needed to have a grown up in the room.

Coconutfatfeast · 02/02/2021 19:59

This was us until we moved recently. This is what helped:

  • Agree with PP about swapping rooms so DC in master bedroom
  • Likewise as PP said Ikea Kallax units are great for hiding toys
  • Do toy rotation, don’t let them have everything out at once as it gets claustrophobic
  • Vertical shelving pretty much everywhere - behind the toilet, in the kitchen, everywhere!
  • Put TV on wall if not already to save space
  • If you have a full size dining table swap it for a small cheap Ikea space saving one for now
  • Bed which lifts up with storage space underneath it. It is very ugly but very practical.
Of course, you’ve probably already thought of all of these! Smile
rawalpindithelabrador · 02/02/2021 20:02

We lived a family of 5 in a 1-bed once, for nearly a year. IKEA all the way!

Kids were 3, 6 and 9. The girls went in a bunk bed in the bedroom, 3-year-old boy in a toddler bed in there, too and we slept on one of those sofas that folds down to a bed in the living room.