To not see 70 as elderly

[Ibeliveinyou]

I don’t know if if it’s because my parents are now that age but I just don’t see a 70 as old.

I consider 'elderly' based on how someone looks - frailty/health. Otherwise, no 70 on its own, I wouldn't call elderly. Some do look "elderly" at 60/70 and unless I know their actual age, I'd think they're elderly.

In their 70's, my mum had severe dementia, and neither parent could walk any distance, had multiple health issues etc. Nothing to do with their attitude, everything to do with bad luck in health. Mum died in her 70's, dad at 80.
My PIL started their 70's very sprightly and capable, off all over the world on holiday, but now you can really see FIL slowing down and much less capable of dealing with change

It’s elderly.

My mom is already dead.
My dad has finally admitted that he can’t really keep up with his large property by himself any longer. He either needs to hire a caretaker or sell.

My ILs are finally admitting that their house with its steep drive that cars regularly can’t traverse in bad weather, might be the difference between life and death if an ambulance can’t make it up one of these days.

@GhoulWithADragonTattoo

I am 43 and don’t think I’m middle aged. I would say 50 plus.

DS (age 16) would disagree!

I was shocked when he described me as middle-aged when I was 44, but there you have it 🤷🏼‍♀️.

Then I looked back at old holiday pictures when my parents - who I considered middle-aged at the time - were younger than me.

My parents are 70 and 71

They’d kill me if I referred to them as elderly

They own their own business and both still work full time. Both are fit and healthy, don’t look their age, very active - Dad is into Harley Davidsons, mum walks miles with her dog, before lockdown she went swimming/Pilates/yoga regularly - so I kind of forget they’re 70+ sometimes.

My grandmother at 90 used to go volunteer to go shopping and run errands for the elderly - they were all a good 10 years younger than she was. She had a fall at 94 and broke her pelvis and wrist and never really recovered.

@Coughsyrupsucks

Depends on the person. My parents at 70 and 73 are most certainly not elderly. My in laws are very elderly and suffer from dementia and all sorts of health problems at 72. How people can age so differently is really quite shocking.

^^this My aunt and uncle in their eighties and are amazingly healthy. Whereas my father was dead from cancer at 69 my mum also isn’t in great health.

I'd say from 80. Perhaps because I've known a lot of people in their early 70s whom I saw as older but not elderly. Perhaps it's due to my age and I definitely have no issues with being called middle aged now or elderly when the time comes, even at 70.

I think it depends but I think most 70 somethings are still quite fit, but it may depend where you live, I know health outcomes and life expectancy vary significantly.

My mum is 81 and still running around after everyone else, giving lifts to people, (eg took a lady the same age for her covid vaccine) and picking up things for people during the first lockdown (not doing full shops for people, but getting them milk or bread or something like that when she was out anyway). She has a back problem and is frailer than she was, but health-wise is very fit. She moans about "old people" who are probably younger than she is!

However, DH talks about his grandparents in their late 60s who seemed like 95 year olds now who sat with blankets across their knees and were always going on about draughts.

I think some of it is down to attitude - I feel like some people can't wait to get old.

I agree, when I was little I thought 70
Was ancient. My dad turned 70 last month and I can't think of him as old!

My parents are elderly at early 70's compared to my friends' parents. If you met my dad you would think he was much, much older. Retired far too early. Doctor told him he is appalling shape for his age. My mum tries to do things to keep her active but looking after my dad has aged her too.

My father was fit until his late 80s but he had Parkinsons and once it really took hold he went downhill quite quickly, dying when he was 93.

Without the Parkinsons, I suspect he'd still be with us.

My aunt died at 86 of a stroke but before that she was very fit physically. She was showing signs of dementia by the time she died, so it was probably good that she died when she was still "with it" and didn't deteriorate. I was quite shocked when she died, I kind of thought she would go on forever.

My mum has also been banging on for years about 'how old they are'. Got what she wished for.

Age of death in the UK is 81.5 years old. So I think when I'm about 11 years from death I'd consider myself elderly.

You can still be very active at 70 but you are old.

@supercee

My parents are elderly at early 70's compared to my friends' parents. If you met my dad you would think he was much, much older. Retired far too early. Doctor told him he is appalling shape for his age. My mum tries to do things to keep her active but looking after my dad has aged her too.

That's sad. When did your dad retire?

Honestly I think it depends how you envision/interpret 'elderly'.

In my mind 'elderly' conjures up doddery old folk who are frail of both body and mind.

Also in my mind 'old' is less visual than that.

So for instance, Cher is old, but I can't think of her as elderly, although I think I'm literally wrong!

My step mum also - shes 77 - fit and gorgeous and full of beans, just not quite as many beans as a decade ago. Quite obviously old - but again doesn't seem 'elderly. '

My ex neighbour Betty - same age as my step mum but a world of difference in demenour, attitude, and outward appearance. She does seem quite elderly.

Middle age is seen as 45-60 and late middle age is 58-60 according to my internet search 5 minutes ago!
Beyond 60 is classed as old. Awul to think that as there are now millions of women 60+ who look fantastic/fit/youthful and without surgical enhancements!

I could be quite depressed at the thought of someone referring to me as "that old lady" but there isn't much I can do about it.

@redsquirrelfan mid-late 50's I think. Was with his company for over 25 years and took a voluntary redundancy deal then didn't do anything else as my mum was still working, so he sat about on his computer drinking wine. He's a frail alcoholic. Such a waste.

I remember he aged pretty much overnight when he gave up work. Giving up work is fine if you have hobbies, regular holidays or a life to look forward to. My mum always talked about getting a holiday home etc but nothing materialised, even when she retired not long after him. Lot to be said for working, even in later life I think.

Life expectancy for females in the UK 2016 to 2018:

As always it depends on what you are looking at.

Mean 82.9
Median 85.9
Mode 89.1

I'll go for the mode thanks .

My grandmother is early 80s. She seems elderly to me though she is still full of life. She definitely didn’t seem elderly 10 years ago.

It depends on how old you are and, I think, how healthy the 70 year old in question is. As I get older, the age when one is "old" seems to get pushed further back. However, I would say someone in their 70s is old, because my own experience with a family member in their 70s is that they are in very poor health (which has aged them terribly in terms of looks, what they can/cannot do, outlook on life etc).

I think of people around 70 as old but not elderly. I consider elderly more appropriate for those who are elderly frail, which is more often at least late 70s or more.
There are now a lot of families with two generations over 60 (the Royal family has two generations over 70). If you still have parents alive, it's hard to be defined as elderly.

It was, but now I'm approaching it - it isn't.

Of course it’s elderly.

It’s not a term to describe how fit you are it’s purely age. So if you are 70 and running marathons your still elderly. You could be 40 and barely able to walk you would be middle aged and unfit/unhealthy/in deteriorating health.

I guess it depends on what your expectations are for "elderly". I had my eyes opened living in Japan. I met so many people fit people in their 80s that would go out playing tennis etc and lived much more active lives than are expected and generally seen in the UK.

70 is elderly. Elderly doesnt necessarily mean decrepit or ready for the grave. I will say though that things can deteriorate very quickly when you are 70+ in a way that's not typical in younger people. It is also very much a case of "use it or lose it".