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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to ask what age you looked and felt your best?

101 replies

strawberrypip · 01/02/2021 12:20

thinking about this after a conversation I had with my mum. she said it's now, at 47 because she was so insecure in her 20s and 30s and had 3 young kids, whereas now she is confident and gets sleep lol!

I am already starting to feel age insecurity creeping in and I'm only 27! so what age did you feel/look your best?

OP posts:
Oblomov21 · 01/02/2021 13:35

Early 30's. Probably straight after ds's. I lost all my pregnancy weight quickly and looked ok.

BillieSpain · 01/02/2021 13:38

30 to 40

Draineddraineddrained · 01/02/2021 13:38

Probably when I was a primary school child in terms of feeling good - I was a healthy weight, very strong and that was before I started comfort eating and learned to hate my own body. But that's probably not what you meant!

I now see I looked pretty good in my early/mid twenties but didn't know what to do with myself (on account of all that self-hatred). Shame I didn't realise how decent I looked at the time and enjoy it more.

I am now so very pregnant with second child at 36 and I look and feel bloody awful.

I've already booked my friend who is a PT to sort me out once baby is 3/6 months old. I have looked like shit for most of my 30s so far, never worse than the past 3 years, and as this is my last baby at least I will know post birth that this is the body I'm left with and can work on getting it stronger and less repulsive from the ground up.

The main thing that would make me feel better these days would be to be stronger and fitter. I will always have stretch marks, section overhang and saggy boobs at this point, but I would like to be able to run after my kids/climb two flights of stairs without puffing, and to have energetic sex with my partner again instead of choosing only positions that won't expose my flappy bits and lack of stamina!

In terms of looking better, I think if I could be bothered to do make-up and wear sexier clothes that would be a step in the right direction - but I am aware I never have and never will be a raving beauty, age will inevitably make me look 'worse' by most metrics, and I think focussing on trying to 'look good' is going to be a negative path for me - so I instead embrace my ever-growing natural impulse not to give a fuck, I feel this is far more sustainable in the long term!

opanon · 01/02/2021 13:43

26-30. I am now 32 with a 2 year old feeling fat and frazzled

speakout · 01/02/2021 13:44

I probably looked my most attractive in early 30s.
No kids and a good salary to pay for expensive clothes, facials, hair etc.

I feel at my best now in terms of accepting who I am, not much rattles me, I don't suffer from anxiety, I can see straight though people - I can see a lie easily and understand other's motivations.
Not much scares me in life and I feel strong in the core of my being.
I am late 50s, probably happier in my own skin than I have ever been.

Lookingforwardto2021 · 01/02/2021 13:46

In my late 40s early 50s. I lost weight, am toned and have a softness yet confidence.

Claref80 · 01/02/2021 13:49

Probably around age 20. Looked good, lots of confidence, lots of friends, great career ahead. Now I'm 40, two and a half stone heavier, stay at home mum and never felt less confident than I do now.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 01/02/2021 14:09

I didn’t blossom until my mid 30s.
The older I’m getting the more confident I’m becoming,butYou get to that age and very little has changed you obviously assume you’re going to be a wall flower for life.
As a teenager while everyone else was ridiculously over confident and pulling their pouty faces I was appallingly shy often to the point where I physically couldn't speak.
Im the polar opposite now.

I have seen it the other way confident kids have became shy adults

LizFlowers · 01/02/2021 19:52

@opanon

26-30. I am now 32 with a 2 year old feeling fat and frazzled
I didn't feel at all attractive at your age with a toddler, difference being that I was skeletal - ironing board shaped :-).

I blossomed later and so will you.

purplebagladylovesgin · 01/02/2021 23:07

I looked my best at 23, but truly felt my best at 47. Liberated, alive and beautiful Grin. That's not what I saw in the mirror but it's how I felt.

CreditCardHelpPlease · 01/02/2021 23:11

28-34 great six years, got past don't of the dubious fashion choices of my early twenties, slim but very healthy, plenty of time to work out, getting plenty of sleep so my skin was great, active social life and plenty of holidays so felt happy and relaxed. I'm now 36 with a toddler and feel like shit.....

HitchFlix · 01/02/2021 23:14

24-26 looked good, felt good, travelled to the other side of the world and lived it up in the sunshine those years. It was like one big holiday and I had the greatest bunch of friends.

Decade on now and there's a world of difference in how I look/live/feel.

Oysterbabe · 01/02/2021 23:15

Probably late 20s but I feel fairly good about how I look now at 40. My body isn't very toned, I look and am knackered but I'm comfortable in my skin.

Ponoka7 · 01/02/2021 23:15

34-39, I still looked great, had loads of confidence, especially sexual confidence and had a great time.

AnnaSW1 · 01/02/2021 23:20

30-34

Oooohbehave · 01/02/2021 23:22

Late 20s/early 30s. I'm 42 now and although I can still scrub up OK on a day to day basis I can't really be arsed.

Annabell80 · 01/02/2021 23:28
  1. I was overweight at secondary school and when I went to sixth form college I lost my extra weight and felt terrific.
ParkheadParadise · 01/02/2021 23:29

Early 30's
Dd was grown up. DH and I went on fantastic holidays. In the photos, I looked happy and healthy.

BakewellGin1 · 01/02/2021 23:36

17 to 24.... Pre babies.... Although when DS was 2 I lost a lot of weight and looked OK again...

If I'm honest I totally let myself go when pregnant and after birth of DS2... However also had periods of depression, ptsd, anxiety, work stress and general shit Inc relationship and family illness..

However I've decided to do something about it and although I will never be the size of or look like my pre children self... I plan to tackle my weight and mental well being this year Grin

madamecake · 01/02/2021 23:36
  1. A very exact age as I had acne for years and this was the age when I started roaccutane.

So a lovely year of clear skin, no wrinkles and a great figure, I then got pregnant and felt really frumpy for this first few years of motherhood.

38 now, could do with toning up a bit and sorting my wardrobe out, but happy in myself.

Justyouwaitandseeagain · 01/02/2021 23:43

Style, clothes, hair and general confidence probably between 18 and 26, when I was young, free, and sometimes single with time and money to spend on myself. Body wise, my figure was incredible after childbirth and on mat leave. Constant breastfeeding and walking the kids for miles meant the weight dropped off me - I’d never been so toned. Very little time or money to spend on myself or anything to really make an effort for Sad

DipSwimSwoosh · 01/02/2021 23:43

15-30

FraughtwithGin · 01/02/2021 23:45

I am 62 and look and feel the best I have ever been, except for a short while when I was 21 - but life was totally different then.
I have lovely skin, no visible grey hairs and few wrinkles. Also no excess flab, despite nearly a year without exercise. However, I think 90% is genetic.

Ladybird69 · 01/02/2021 23:55

Late teens to early twenties was slim and beautiful (but of course didn’t realise it) but I had a spring in my step and a weird sense of humour so had lots of fun. Then met evil exh who basically stripped my self esteem and kept me practically house bound for 20 years. If I could go back 😢minus him of course.

bloodyhairy · 02/02/2021 00:09

Pre-children.

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