Have you squeezed the most out of life - or have you not?

[mullingoverthepast]

Like quite a few of us lately, I think I'm spending time looking back with nostalgia. I feel like I had so much fun and opportunities in one way, but also just didn't really have my shit together so didn't fully appreciate how those opportunities would one day be gone.

I really understand now what is meant by the saying "youth is wasted on the young" though in all seriousness, don't really agree with that either, because probably the magic part of youth is you are unburdened by all that stuff.

If I could have my time again, I'd try to be more shrewd. There are plenty of very shrewd young people out there - how I wish I'd been more like them!

What about you? Do you feel you've availed of all the best opportunities when young? Or have you kind of muddled through hoping for the best like me?!

What achievements are you proudest of? I have none that stand out, really. Regrettably!

I'm early 30s and looks have gone already.

I feel that I've wasted my life largely.
I married too young due to pressure from my mother.
I did a job I never enjoyed due to pressure from my mother - I wasn't allowed to choose the subjects I wanted or to do the college course I wanted.
I had a chance of a different job but she stopped me doing it.
Another chance of a different job but she threw the "After all the sacrifices I made to put you through college" etc etc
I got divorced but that brought shame on her.
I'm now too old to start again career wise and stuck in a shitty town where everybody gossips about you and can't afford to move.

On the plus side - I have 2 lovely kids who are doing well in life.
I have plenty of money but nothing to spend it on at the moment

Sorry to be so negative but it just shows how a toxic parent can have such an effect on their child's life.

I've had a pretty good life so far

Of course I've had some ups & downs

I've done things that I've wanted to & I've not compromised.

Hopefully, I've got some more years that I will just add on more enjoyable experiences

I'm not one to procrastinate, so the next plans will happen

Thanks DDIJ
She died a few years ago and neither my sister nor I have shed a single tear or marked any of her anniversaries.

My DD finds it odd that we were so under her control but it was the 70s. I made sure that my kids chose their own path in life and that the main thing was that they were happy - not "What will people think"

Luckily I've got loads of good memories & photos to look back on

Have also re connected with some old friends during the vivid lockdown on line & hope to meet up in the future. Have shared some old pre digital photos

Covid not vivid !

I've worked & I've been lucky

From my travels, I appreciate that some people in other countries do not have the same opportunities that I've had

I feel that I could have done so much more. Desperately wanted to see the world when I was younger but my fiance was not interested so I never did. I put myself through college but had daily arguments with my parents because they felt I should get married at 18 and become a housewife. I was told at 14 that I would never go to university because that isn't what we did - I couldn't believe that my parents could be so unsupportive if their child having a different dream a life to what they chose. I ended up doing an OU course when I was 25 but have not had the opportunity to pursue a career in it. 12 years later and I have 2 young children, a 3rd on the way and I am hoping to start another OU degree next year or the year after. I am also going to do what I can to see the parts of the world that I long too.
For too long I have put other people first (obviously not including my DC in this, they will always come first) and I am going to start doing what I want to do otherwise to me it is a life half lived.

I agree with @LetItGoGo - I couldn’t really be free to try different jobs or retrain in my 20s because I always needed to have money in to pay rent.

I did a lot of bucket list things in my 20s, which I’m glad of, but I hugely regret not getting better grades at school and uni and trying for a decent career in something that “means” something.

I fell in to an ok middle management role, for which I’m grateful, but it’s money for old rope really and I don’t have a sense of pride and purpose in it. And I can’t just retrain now as we want to get a mortgage this year and I don’t have good grades to just transfer in to something else.

The traditional working class trap of needing to work, so not being able to take risks. I have lots of regrets but now I’m a Mum and so need to keep a stable job and do boring things like pay in to savings accounts and pensions.

I had my first DC very young so didn’t get the whole care free travelling. However from birth to 7 I went travelling with my DS, we went to different places about 6 times a year when I had work holiday.
So don’t feel like I missed out too much.
I now have 3 kids. I was lucky that I have a good job with some great opportunities and occasional travel for work.
I don’t really regret anything and probably wouldn’t change anything.
I am late 20s coming up to my 30s my eldest is now a teenager.

@AgeLikeWine

No.

I worked way too hard in my 20s. I was desperate to prove myself at work, which is what happens when working class young people enter middle class spaces in which they feel they don’t belong, and feel they are not entitled to occupy. I now regret all the late nights & weekends spent working when I should have been out enjoying my youth.

@AgeLikeWine FWIW, I feel exactly the same, but am from a pretty privileged background. Still felt the need to work long hours and prove myself, because it was the norm in the industry. And am now a reluctant SAHM so it was all a bit pointless.

I think I did a lot before I settled down. I married at 30 and then had 3 kids by 35.
Before that I lived in 4 different countries, learnt 3 languages, house shared with a huge range of people. I did 2 degrees.
But now, if I could somehow squeeze it in, I would have travelled more and done a masters degree.
I haven't had lots of relationships but I'm glad I had a few. I can't imagine being with one person from teenagehood.