To wish he would give ‘Its a Sin’ a chance?

[charlie6186]

My ex picked up the kids tonight and mentioned that everyone at his work is raving about the show ‘It’s a Sin’.
I said I had watched it and was completely hooked- I fell in love with the characters and felt so many emotions throughout the series. Being born in the early eighties, I was aware of the pandemic growing up but it was completely above my head. Watching it made me open my eyes to how scary life must have been for people who lived through it and were at risk. I told him that I think it’s an amazing piece of television and he should give it a chance.
To be met with the response of: “I don’t want to see blokes at it. I’m not a batty boy.”
Other than the obvious annoyance of his use of insulting terminology, I’m a bit peeved that he hasn’t noticed that the world has a different outlook nowadays and acceptance and equality is a great thing.
Anyone else know of a bloke who is being stubborn/embarrassed to watch? I feel like he is missing out in a real chance to witness a really moving and much needed story but being held back by his own prejudices (possible embarrassment) to see past the end of his nose.

YABVVU to care what ex-h watches or doesn't watch.

I don't know anyone who has watched it. I don't want to be reminded of all the talented men who died from HIV and AIDS.

He's your ex, why do you care what he watches? Just be concerned with his homophobic attitudes and make sure you bring your children up understanding equality and just being a nice person!

@Snoozysnoozy

how scary life must have been for people who lived through it and were at risk.

You mean by being promiscuous and having unprotected sex?

I'm sorry, have I stumbled into 1985?

Your kids are teens and adults?! I thought you were gonna say they were very young? What do you even NEED to talk to him for?

OP, I feel for your children if one (or more) came out as gay with a dad like that.

I'm sorry, have I stumbled into 1985

Well it's not an airborne virus is it? You don't sneeze and pass it on as far as I'm aware. So transmission is mostly via unprotected sex.

I used to go into my village pub a couple of times a week before all the lockdowns, I am female,live alone and 70 plus in age, so liked to go and chat to people.. But I have noticed over the years, there have been a lot of older men in there, who are very homophobic. Several gay guys have visited the pub at times, and the older men always either avoid them or make objectional comments about them. you know, sneery and laughing comments etc.. It's never women making any such comments, or the yougies, it's just the older men.

@Snoozysnoozy so promiscuous people don't deserve sympathy if they found that they've contracted a disease which will give them a very very short life?

And maybe you weren't around during the pandemic but THAT language is exactly the kind was used that excused rampant homophobia even for men who didn't have AIDS/HIV+

Well, @Snoozysnoozy, people fuck. You might not like it but it's a long standing human tradition.

I think that your were U to recommend it to your tit of an ex,
I don't think you were U to find it an amazing programme.
I tried to get DH to watch it with me, he doesn't have the same interests as me so wasn't into it. Glad I watched all but the first episode alone so I could laugh and cry without feeling like an absolute dick. I don't think I've seen anything quite so moving before. So beautiful but so so sad. I think that not everyone will appreciate it though

@Snoozysnoozy

how scary life must have been for people who lived through it and were at risk.

You mean by being promiscuous and having unprotected sex?

Which is relevant to PP's comment how, exactly?

Why do you care what your ex watches ?
I'm watching it now and really like it ..not everyone will love it.

some people even like watching Top Gear or Antiques Roadshow , it's up to them !

LakeGeneva, they do. I have no problem with who fucks who. But if you're going to be promiscuous then wear protection. In fact isn't there a character in this program who is knowingly unprotected sex even though they have contracted HIV or AIDS?

It brought back many memories of the 80s and attending Clause 28 rallies and marching for equal rights. I think the line that struck me was 'lots of young boys are going home these days' as they often just disappeared home to die. I remember my friend trying to get a mortgage but couldn't because he was gay. Terrible times.

In answer to the OP a colleague's partner won't watch it as he doesn't want to watch gay sex as he is not gay.

I've only watched the first part thus far, but I enjoyed it.

YANBU. It never ceases to astound and rather depress me how many blokes of my age (mid-40s) and even younger still have this bigoted (and to put it rather crudely) "backs to the wall" boneheaded attitude to sexuality.

Snoozysnoozy it's representing what happened. People had unprotected sexual all the time as we hadn't really heard of AIDS until the disease was out and about. Women on the pill never used protection as aids was a 'gay disease'. It was only really 1986 when the 'don't die of ignorance' campaign started - even then many women ignored it as sexuality was taboo in many places

@theThreeofWeevils

I have done a mammoth job of making them into brilliant young adults Are they as modest as you too?

No need to be spiteful. I’m not trying to gloat. When I say a mammoth job that mean I have worked bloody hard to in-still compassion and decency into my kids. Even with the negativity coming from their other parent. Plus picking up the pieces when they are let down at the last minute or upset by him. On top of that I am the boring one. No fancy holidays. Homework to be done. Help with the dishwasher etc. Real food not just Mac Donald’s or takeaway pizzas. They go to dads and it’s a jolly holiday- not exactly what I can proper parenting. But as they get older they respect me because of it and I think they have turned out great and I’m not at all ashamed to brag. I’m not even sorry if this offends you.

Why do you care what he watches? Thank goodness he's an ex.

I'm a bloke and not watching it. Having lived my adolescence/young adulthood through that period, and been frightened back into the closet for 30 years by the advent of AIDS, I have no desire to watch a slightly horrible slice of my life replayed as entertainment.

Maybe he feels the same way.

My ex (female) who is of the same age as me (and went to the same clubs) loved it and has been recommending it to everyone.

@Snoozysnoozy I haven't watched the programme but I do know that it took a long time to figure out why young previously healthy gay men were dying with mysterious conditions not seen before in the numbers they were. They literally did not know why it was happening. How terrifying and tragic a situation is that? That just at the point where you're able to live a semi tolerable semi open life and make close connections with other people, they all start dying and you wonder if you're next. And this goes on for years.

Ofc these guys weren't wearing condoms. They didn't know they needed to: that was the point. They'd removed themselves from the whole hetero reproductive dance and they didn't have anything to worry about, other than a wee trip to the docs for a script every now and again if they got really unlucky. Or so they thought.

@Snoozysnoozy

LakeGeneva, they do. I have no problem with who fucks who. But if you're going to be promiscuous then wear protection. In fact isn't there a character in this program who is knowingly unprotected sex even though they have contracted HIV or AIDS?

Do you have any sense of the context of the show at all? Ridiculous.

He is homophobic and It's a Sin is a drama about homosexual men , so why would he want to watch it?

I loved it, it was really interesting & id never really thought about how harrowing & scary it must of been at the time. Brilliant watch. My DP won’t watch it either, I don’t think it’s about homosexuality though. His loss! Your ex DP is a twat, god forbid one of your children turns out to be gay with that attitude!