To be crying over argument with DD?

[LemonSherbetFancies]

She split with a guy a year or so ago. They were not together long. In truth, I think he used her to get over another woman. He was cruel to DD and yet managed to find a new partner very quickly on.
I told DD to block him on FB. No good will come of looking at his profile and it only makes her feel worse when she sees how happy he is and all the holidays and events he goes on. Yet she won't. Last night, we had a huge row. She was very down yet again as her ex was proclaiming his love for his girlfriend. I'm afraid to say I lost all patience. I told her I was sick and tired of her moping around after someone who has forgotten all about her. She then yelled at me that I don't know what it's like as I am in a very happy relationship.
She's now threatening to move in with a friend and I am sitting here crying as I just can't seem to help her move on. I know she is in her twenties but I hate seeing her like this.
Aibu to have lost my patience and to tell her to move on?

She is waiting for it to end terribly and for him to be as unhappy as her. Totally unhealthy.
Also, why would I not want my daughter to follow his example? She should focus on herself and meeting someone new so she can be happy again. As for the tough love, I am only being this way because I have exhausted the other option of sympathy and nicely nice approach. I will repeat again, it has been a long time since she has felt like this and the monitoring of his FB account will keep her in a constant state of misery.

@LemonSherbetFancies

She is waiting for it to end terribly and for him to be as unhappy as her. Totally unhealthy. Also, why would I not want my daughter to follow his example? She should focus on herself and meeting someone new so she can be happy again. As for the tough love, I am only being this way because I have exhausted the other option of sympathy and nicely nice approach. I will repeat again, it has been a long time since she has felt like this and the monitoring of his FB account will keep her in a constant state of misery.

What does she say when you say to block him?

She should focus on herself and meeting someone new so she can be happy again

Or she could just focus on herself and be happy again . Beginning to see why she thinks being in a relationship (a REALLY HAPPY one, where all the Facebook flap is ABSOLUTELY GENUINE) is the be all and end all.

Honestly OP, I give up. If you can't see how strange your approach is, and how unlikely to be effective, then crack on with it. I just hope like anything your DD can find another job and move out of your house. The last thing you need when heartbroken and depressed is someone pulling you down like this.

Gets angry and says that I do not understand.
Someone had a point upthread when they say it will make it seem more real that it has all ended if she blocked him. Yet all it does is torture her day after day. I also think she is hoping to get answers as to why she was not enough but this girl is. She would never take him back so I don't understand. It would make everything so much easier if she had the courage to block him.

@LemonSherbetFancies

Gets angry and says that I do not understand. Someone had a point upthread when they say it will make it seem more real that it has all ended if she blocked him. Yet all it does is torture her day after day. I also think she is hoping to get answers as to why she was not enough but this girl is. She would never take him back so I don't understand. It would make everything so much easier if she had the courage to block him.

It's not about courage though.

I feel like I'm just getting at you OP and I don't want to but I just don't understand how you're seeing this. I hope someone who does can help.

It’s so much easier to see the right path from the outside than when you’re in it. I totally get your frustration because I’ve been through it with friends (and I’m sure they’ve felt it about me too!) but getting cross with her isn’t going to help. She’ll get there in time.

Loads of really good advice from posters, but op you don't seem to be listening. My mum is just like you. She'd see herself as a 'positive' person who is strong and upbeat and just gets on with life. However, for her, this also meant an inability to acknowledge when something painful has happened and that it's ok to be sad. Everything was a problem to be solved.

I think you need to think about how best to protect your relationship with your daughter, in addition to how to help her forget the ex. She'll get over the ex in time, with or without your help. You should focus your energy on ensuring she still has a relationship with you at the end of this.