I've walked the same path with my mum, without the injuries -she just got drunk and slept.
It's tough when so much of the relationship is determined by alcohol, I knew I could only have a conversation between 10 and 12, before she would get too agitated or too slurry. She would cut you to the quick with offhand comments, you could never trust what she said.
The constant let downs when they are so enthusiastic, but then "something" happens to make it impossible.
And this happens for decades! And society just turns a blind eye for the most part, the worst people bleat about it being a disease and you should treat it as such. No It Isn't treated like that. I had no respite, there are no coffee mornings, no awareness walks, it's still shamed and I'm still shamed by association.
So people like kimchi are bloody awful to deal with, they popup in a crisis when you're least able to cope with the comments, they capitalise on your worst fear, that your mother is worse because of you - because you're the common factor. It's rubbish of course, but by then the secrecy about family becomes so entrenched you don't confide in people, even your partner. You get no sense of perspective and you're eternally caught up in the drunk persons drama. At its worst it becomes co-dependence.
Having your own kids, it changes your priorities, but somehow your own needs still come bottom of the pile - it's a learned behaviour.
You can unlearn it, it's hard, but you can do it, so @JustAboutOverit, I applaud you, for handling something differently, the stately homes thread here is excellent - and helped me form coping strategies and truly get it. Everyone's situation is slightly different but I hope you put yourself first and foremost, it will help you weather the long term far better.