Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think this is cheeky? (Property related)

226 replies

opinionatedfreak · 17/01/2021 22:18

We are due to complete on the sale of a family home tomorrow.

The person died so the house is empty.

I’ve just gone round to read the meters and discovered a pile of garden furniture in the back garden.

I’m assuming it belongs to the buyers.

AIBU to think it is cheeky to do this without asking?

YANBU = they are cheeky
YABU = what’s the problem the house will be theirs tomorrow.

OP posts:
Melroses · 18/01/2021 17:29

Feet up and drink a toast to the departed relative with the champagne Flowers

Malbecfan · 18/01/2021 17:36

In the great scheme of things, it's not a big deal. Yes, of course they should have asked you and were rude not to. But if they had exchanged contracts, they were committed to purchasing the house so I can understand it.

When we moved to our current house, I asked the previous owners if I could bring our musical instruments over the day before. She kindly agreed; it meant I could transport them carefully in my car. We asked if we could put our DDs' Wendy house in the garden and again, they agreed. They had already moved out, but we asked on every occasion because to us, it's good manners. Since we have lived here, we have contacted them on several occasions and it has always been a warm & cordial relationship.

I have had buyers behave similarly to yours, but mine lied to me and it leaves a nasty taste. Try to move forward and think that the property is no longer your responsibility and hopefully you can enjoy the proceeds. Many years on, I'm over it. I did learn that letting agents' To Let boards burn beautifully in the process...

propertyhell · 18/01/2021 17:39

Having just gone through a sale and currently a purchase I think it's incredibly rude they accessed and left furniture in the garden.

Also we were told that we must absolutely not hand over the keys until the money had been received so something has gone wrong there too.

ladypete · 18/01/2021 18:17

@Pumpkintopf

Your estate agents were negligent handing over keys before confirmation of transfer of funds from your solicitor. What if something had gone wrong? That's really bad, and I still don't agree with anyone on this thread who is trying to tell you it was fine for them to put their furniture in your garden without permission- it wasn't!

(I hope you are now drinking the champagne, you deserve it after all this!)

This x 1000. I can’t believe people think this is ok.
Original poster
opinionatedfreak · 18/01/2021 18:24

@VinylDetective no according to the neighbours (reliable) they were in the house 7hrs prior to funds being transferred.

Buyers asked to use the key safe for key transfer to avoid having to go to estate agents citing Covid.

I’m now wondering if they had somehow got the code for it when viewing (all viewings were accompanied).

My brother and I had a discussion last night about the key safe - I wanted to change the code but he said I was being paranoid so we didn’t.

Estate agent insistent that they didn’t give out code prior to funds arriving. I’m going to speak to them tomorrow but I’m not sure we will ever know the full ins and outs of it.

OP posts:
VinylDetective · 18/01/2021 18:43

I’m going to speak to them tomorrow but I’m not sure we will ever know the full ins and outs of it.

Why bother? They now own the house and the money is in your bank account. It’s all done now, just forget it.

HintOfVintagePink · 18/01/2021 18:49

OP this is an upsetting situation but what if you find out the buyers did access the keys early and the agent let them in sooner than they should have? What recourse will you have? A rant at the agent? Asking for a reduction in their fee (which has probably already been paid by the solicitor today)?
For your own peace, put it out of your mind, wish the buyers well and move one. I am saying this will all the kindness I can convey by text.

combatbarbie · 18/01/2021 19:04

Well thankfully you having the street WhatsApp group their neighbours will know that they are cheeky fucker who, give them an inch, would take a mile.

I completely understand your feelings OP, it was the family home, you are grieving and should be able to have final moments of memories in that house without having to worry about wankers trespassing. There could have been a problem with funds or transfers. I personally would not be happy that they accessed the house early.

When we bought our house in Scotland we were told exchange of funds would be 10am but had arranged that current owner would give us the keys as he had removals booked for that day as he was in a chain. Transfer didn't actually complete til gone 12 and as it was rural we literally had nowhere to go. Thankfully he was courteous with tea etc and we helped him get the big stuff into his van.

steff13 · 18/01/2021 19:07

@opinionatedfreak

Yup. I’m still annoyed that they took away my final walk round by deciding it was OK to trespass in the garden.

I’m annoyed that somehow they got keys and were able to start moving in 7hrs before the house belonged to them.

It’s ages since I bought in Scotland but I don’t think you pay any money until the entry date.

The house buying & selling process is totally different.

They only "took away your final walk round" because you've chosen to let them.
islockdownoveryet · 18/01/2021 19:39

So what will speaking to them tomorrow achieve? Who are you speaking to the buyers or estate agent ? If they are cf buyers they won’t care shrug and think you are overreacting. If they are apologetic will you feel better ? But I strongly suspect they will think you are overreacting and with the stress of moving won’t be welcome . If you go and speak to the estate agents you’ve already said they didn’t give the code until after funds transferred. I strongly suggest if you think speaking to them will make you feel better , it won’t .
It’s only you your upsetting it’s a house and house that is no longer yours . Stewing over something like this petty that is done is no point whatsoever.
Your annoyed but it’s done .

acatcalledjohn · 18/01/2021 20:14

They only "took away your final walk round" because you've chosen to let them.

How on earth did you come to the conclusion that OP chose that? Confused

Itsnotlikethiswithotherpeople · 18/01/2021 20:18

[quote opinionatedfreak]@VinylDetective no according to the neighbours (reliable) they were in the house 7hrs prior to funds being transferred.

Buyers asked to use the key safe for key transfer to avoid having to go to estate agents citing Covid.

I’m now wondering if they had somehow got the code for it when viewing (all viewings were accompanied).

My brother and I had a discussion last night about the key safe - I wanted to change the code but he said I was being paranoid so we didn’t.

Estate agent insistent that they didn’t give out code prior to funds arriving. I’m going to speak to them tomorrow but I’m not sure we will ever know the full ins and outs of it.[/quote]
What ins and outs? I’m sorry your loss but this is clouding your judgement. Honestly anyone else you talk to about this is going to think you’re totally off your trolley, however polite they are.

Embrace Frozen and let it go.

Bluntness100 · 18/01/2021 20:24

Op I am unsure if you’re normally like this or if you are struggling to let go?

You need to accept thr house is sold now. It’s theirs, I’m really sorry for your loss, but you need to try to let go. For your sake. Try to remember thr happy memories of thr house and the deceased person. Don’t do this any more ok? You’re just prolonging it for yourself. You need to try to let go.

VinylDetective · 18/01/2021 20:29

@acatcalledjohn

They only "took away your final walk round" because you've chosen to let them.

How on earth did you come to the conclusion that OP chose that? Confused

Because she chose how to react to finding a bit of furniture moved a few hours too soon.

Quite clearly it’s a choice given that lots of people wouldn’t give a toss.

Plussizejumpsuit · 18/01/2021 21:20

Sorry for your loss op. But you're being massively over the top and really quite dramatic. Obviously this is because of your bereavement.

I'm often out of step with mumsnet but in this case I really don't think people are being awkward or purposefully obtuse. I really think most people wouldn't mind.

Even how you call it trespass is really dramatic. So in the nicest possible way just leave it. Remember the happy times. You seem very fixated on this so try to focus on something else. I know future plans aren't a thing right now but maybe think about some nice thing for the future.

Bookworming · 18/01/2021 23:06

They've exchanged I presume, so contractually have to complete.

Remove the fizz if you wish, they don't know about and won't care anyway.

YABU

🤷‍♀️

Onjnmoeiejducwoapy · 18/01/2021 23:52

OP so sorry for your loss, but I don’t think this is a healthy way to grieve.

Raise it with the agents if you want, but unfortunately I very much doubt they will give a toss as objectively it’s just not a big deal. Garden furniture arriving 24 hours early is hardly the crime of the century, and if your walk was “ruined” that has nothing to do with the furniture—most people would say “oh there’s some furniture” and get back to it.

Clearly there is a strong loss here that needs to be worked through, these very minor issues are triggering you.

Ideasplease322 · 19/01/2021 09:12

You are right in that they shouldn’t have been given keys to the house before they were legally entitled and they shouldn’t have entered your house or garden before they owned it without permission.

But, some people are just a bit cheeky. There is absolutely nothing that can be done about it now. The house is theirs and you will only cause yourself more anger by trying to pursue this.

I know this is hard - and there’s people have taken a few liberties. But it’s all done now - the house is sold.

Wrote them a letter then burn it. Vent about them being cheeky fuckers - get it all out. Don’t send it!!!! Move on

FinallyHere · 19/01/2021 13:13

She also started moving in with her friends and family at 10am in the morning, whilst we were still packing up and moving out.

@Hugoslavia What time did the sale go through ? Either she had no right to enter your house or you were v v late packing up.

I'm intrigued now to know what time the sale went through

Back on topic, I thought I was quite laid back because I would agree if asked. I can't imagine not being asked and I know a few people who would refuse even if asked.

steff13 · 20/01/2021 02:47

@acatcalledjohn

They only "took away your final walk round" because you've chosen to let them.

How on earth did you come to the conclusion that OP chose that? Confused

Because your reaction to a situation is always a choice. 🤷‍♀️🙄
Onekidnoclue · 20/01/2021 03:15

I’m sorry for your loss and share your view on this. They stole a day of the house and it’s a shitty thing to do.
Sadly as with many shitty things the best way (IMO) to deal with it is to try to be glad those people are no longer in your life and move on. Easier said than done though. X

AndAPartridgeInABearTree · 06/02/2021 23:04

I must not be super MN chill @opinionatedfreak either as I would be upset. Has the estate agent explained how they got access early yet?

FangsForTheMemory · 06/02/2021 23:12

I would have been surprised they didn’t ask but not bothered so long as it wasn’t someone fly tipping. I do appreciate you’ve got sensitivities around the whole issue of selling the house and letting it go, though.

isitsummertimeyet · 07/02/2021 02:30

lighten up OP

You hand them the keys tomorrow, moving is a huge drag so if they can get ahead of the curve today and noones offended as the house is empty why make it a big issue.

Are you always uptight about the little things?

cbt944 · 07/02/2021 04:01

Mumsnet is heaving with people who don't understand principles, or even legal right and wrong.

I hope you drank the fizz yourselves.