Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

To not bother with the Christmas shoebox this year

91 replies

Debbiethemum · 28/10/2007 09:25

Last year we were given the shoebox to fill at home, so we did 1 for ds and 1 from dd. Decorated them and talked about why we were doing it and also could do one for dd who is still not at school.
This year they are not giving the boxes out so have to send ds in with the bits. It just seems so impersonal not sure if I can be arsed.
Opinions please,

OP posts:

NBheebieGeebies · 28/10/2007 09:28

Are these the things that you do for charity?

Maybe they are doing it this way so that its something for them to do in class?

Freckle · 28/10/2007 09:28

I did this for years for 3 children. The boys enjoyed putting everything in the boxes and choosing bits for a girl or a boy (tbh we really only did boys, lol).

We always had some old shoeboxes at home, but, if not, I'm sure your local shoe shop will have some spare, especially if you tell them what you want it for.

I would do the boxes at home and send them in with them already completed. Seems silly to just send them in with the bits, unless the school is doing a mass box filling session and incorporating it, and the reasons behind it, into the school's day.

Original poster

Debbiethemum · 28/10/2007 09:33

They are doing it so that they can do them in class together. They are shoeboxes supplied by the Rotary club. I am annoyed because I enjoyed filling them last year with ds & dd and I don't get to do that this year.

I suppose I will have to do this, but what about the parents who can't afford it?

OP posts:

2shoescreepingthroughblood · 28/10/2007 09:38

i always used to do one. but dd's school are not doing it this year. so thats that

smurfgirl · 28/10/2007 10:43

Still worth doing - charity is about othr people surely?

Freckle · 28/10/2007 11:08

Presumably they will collect all the bits that children take in and then do up the boxes so that every child gets to do one whether their parents could afford to provide some items or not.

I agree it can be difficult if it is obvious that some children are not bringing anything in, but that could be because they can't afford it or don't agree with the whole operation. I know this used to be done by a charity called the Samaritan's Purse (I think that's the one). Everyone used to join in and were very happy that children were getting Christmas presents when they wouldn't do normally. However, this charity (I apologise if I have the wrong one) is quite evangelical and they were promoting Christianity quite heavily, especially in areas which were not traditionally Christian ones and a lot of people felt uneasy about this and stopped joining in. After all, if a child isn't a Christian, Christmas can have no meaning for them.

themildmanneredaxemurderer · 28/10/2007 11:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wheresthehamster · 28/10/2007 11:19

This way all children can contribute otherwise it's quite expensive to do on your own now.
A few years ago you made up your own box of new/used/charity shop items with an option to put a couple of pounds in for shipping. The leaflets I've seen recently say only NEW items are acceptable and the contribution to shipping is not optional.
Takes the fun out of it to me. I always tried to get my dds to contribute some things that had meant something to them. Also the operation that our school used to use (name escapes me) didn't appear to have any religious connatations at all.

Freckle · 28/10/2007 11:21

Before anyone jumps on me, I don't agree with boycotting the scheme as outlined above. I was just giving an example of why some people don't support it.

daizydoo · 28/10/2007 11:24

I was staying with friends when they gave one of these boxes out. Admittedly it wasn't Christmas (they had some boxes left over), but the look on the childs face when they saw all the goodies in the box. This box wasnt accompanied by any religious hard sell either, just love and compassion for a small child who had very little.

pointydog · 28/10/2007 11:24

Fair enough, freckle. I don't support it on that basis.

grendel · 28/10/2007 20:26

I have boycotted the 'shoebox appeals' from Samaritans Purse which are distributed at our school every year. This is because:

I am not a Christian and object to my donations being used for evangelical purposes. Samaritan's Purse insert a tract into each shoebox they deliver (or at least they used to).
I object to Samaritan's Purse itself - which is a fiercely evangelical organisation with some rather 'unChristian' views on other religions.
Sending shoeboxes of gifts make you (the donor) feel good but is a hugely inefficient use of your money. If you sent the same amount as you spent on the items in the shoebox to a charitable organisation working on the ground in one of the countries needing support they would make your contribution go SOOOO much further. (Think how much £10.00 could buy in somewhere like Uganda or Darur.)
Giving out shoeboxes of gifts is very divisive. Who chooses who gets a shoebox and who doesn't? How do those who miss out feel?
Giving out shoeboxes of gifts has absolutely no effect on the causes of poverty/distress etc. The same problems will be there next year.

For all these reasons and more I choose to make a Christmas donation to Oxfam and Africa Now instead.

Disclaimer: Clearly other people are entitled to their own opinions.

IndulgeMePlease · 28/10/2007 20:38

Grendel - they don't add a tract in all boxes as in some countries it would be illegal/inappropriate to do so.

Personally, I don't care what religion is putting what tract in as long as they are trying to alleviate the misery that some children have to live in.

Fair play that you choose donate to a charities that you feel better able to endorse but (whispers) aren't they both Christian-based too? Sorry, don't let me put you off them!

fireflyfairy2 · 28/10/2007 20:40

DD's school sent home a leaflet on Friday to fill a shoebox for a charity called "Road of Hope".

It says they send shoe boxes to children in Bosnia & Croatia suffering extreme isolation, poverty & traumas of war.

Also asks "If possible could a donation of £2 be attached to cover our huge transport costs"

Tells us not to include war toys, toys that need batteries, anything sharp or breakable, marbles or bubbles.

They also suggest we follow their code: WWWPCE

W - Wash. Face cloth, soap

W - Write.. pens pencils books crayons

W - Wear. Hat scarf, gloves, socks, undies

P - Play, ball, skipping rope, dolly etc..

C - Cuddle, teddy bear

E - Eats, some candy or sweets

They have included pictures of a local lady handing out the boxes & some photos of the little Osijek children holding up a sign thanking the school children of NI for their gifts

I for one don't do the shoe boxes for feel good factor, I do it so some children who have nothing, finally have something to call their very own.

bookofthedeadmum · 28/10/2007 20:48

My dd brought home a letter about a shoebox appeal but I'll be sending in the box complete - last year a lot of parents did this instead of a bag of assorted goods. Pound shops can provide most of the bits and bobs you'll want with perhaps the exception of sweets/chocolate. I don't think paying £2 for shipping is a lot of money - think how much you'd pay to have the box shipped through Royal Mail to some of these countries. I'm sure most of us will spend 10 or 20 times the cost of one box on our nearest and (literally) dearest this Christmas.

WestCountryLass · 28/10/2007 20:50

Thanks very much for the suggested crieria of items I have been given a leaflet for myDSs school collection and did not know what to put in.

grendel · 28/10/2007 20:54

Indulgemeplease:
Christian based (or any other relgion for that matter) I have no problem with. It is the evangelical nature that I find hard to stomach. (But that's just the atheist in me I guess.)

Tracts are still given out in some of the countries to which the shoeboxes are shipped 'to explain the true meaning of Christmas - God's gift of his son Jesus'.

And I could court more opprobium by commenting that it is nice to think of children getting a toy or some sweets, but that it would probably do them even more good to have a clean water supply, education and good medical care.

{I sound really heartless but I'm not. I'm the softest-hearted person you could come across. It's just that I put a lot of thought and research into this subject a couple of years ago when my DD first started school and I came across the whole shoebox concept. I realised that I could do a lot more good by donating my money in other ways.)

MrsWeasley · 28/10/2007 20:56

Debbiethemum: it could be that the school coudlnt get hold of the shoeboxes this year or it could be that there was a small percentage of boxes returned or that some boxes weren't filled as per the instructions. A woman I know helped with the checking 2 years ago and told of shoeboxes containing just sweets etc.

I am sure you could still fill a box yourself and hand it in if you wanted to.

My kids love making up the boxes but also take "bits" in to school/groups for making a joint box.

bookofthedeadmum · 28/10/2007 21:01

My Mum knows someone who helps with the annual appeal near where she lives and all the boxes are checked before shipment - just in case. They've found some funny items in there - dirty nappies for one .

macdoodle · 28/10/2007 21:06

Oh come on I am fiercly anti religous (Jewish by upbringing) also hate all these evangelical things...but we do this every year ...shows DD how little some kids have/get...the thought of some poor kids opening this box
Te bits can be a couple of quid at Asda/Tesco etc how much do we spend on our own kids at xmas....
doesn't take a lot and you an still donate a tenner to a charity for "better use"...
Bah humbug and all that

MadamePlatypus · 28/10/2007 21:07

We have been given leaflets about this at DS's school. They have told us very clearly not to buy gifts, as they want the 'gift' to come from the children i.e. they should share their toys.

PeachyFleshCrawlingWithBugs · 28/10/2007 21:11

We're not doing it, don't like the way it si run BUT am making sure the boys are involved in alternatives- th MN appeal for a start,a nd they'll get the teachers gifts from Oxfam or Unicer online.

It all balances.

IndulgeMePlease · 28/10/2007 21:25

Grendel, you don't sound heartless at all. You sound like you have your principles and stick to them, good on yer.

EmsMum · 28/10/2007 21:36

I've just done one ... goes to Romania or Albania, there wasn't anything on the sheets about any religious affiliation. I did enjoy putting it together and hoping that it brings some joy to a little girl who hasn't got much. I'd have been pleased to put together a bagful of bits for DD and her classmates to share and assemble into boxes too. Seems like a good thing all round whichever way its done. Though I'm glad it wasn't being organised by some overtly xtian org which was using it to evangalize - that would have been a dilemma.

hippipotOFBLOODami · 28/10/2007 22:37

I am not doing one. The leaflet came home via Dd's school. It was the Samaritan's Purse one. On the leaflet it clearly stated that the boxes would be given out along wiht literature spreading of the word about Jesus etc etc (sorry, cannot remember the wording, threw leaflet into the recycling)

I am an atheist, I believe religion to be divisive and the root cause of so many wars. Therefore, to give gifts and spread religion, when the whole concept of religion may be the cause of the child's poverty in the first place seems odd to me.

But that is just me.

Flip

1 2 3 4