AIBU to complain about smear test experience?

[Ktmc94]

On Monday I contacted my GP surgery to get a new prescription for my pill. I spoke to the nurse who sorted that out but then proceeded to ambush me into a smear test appointment. I have looked into the screening for myself and was not convinced that I wanted to participate (I'm 26). I got flustered and agreed to the appointment thinking that at the very least I could have a discussion with her about it.

Then yesterday I arrived for my appointment. Blood pressure taken for pill and then I was weighed (didn't see the weight on the scale but I'm about a size 14/16). What came next was effectively a lecture about my weight which sent me reeling because I was already feeling nervous and uncomfortable about what was to come.

I was then ordered to strip behind the curtain without further ado, I tried to intimate that I was feeling apprehensive and was basically told to get on with it "it's only 20 seconds it's fine". No reassurance, no chat about the procedure or pros and cons of screening.

She then presented which, to me, looked like a rather large speculum and I voiced my concerns about it and was told that due to my weight a larger size was needed (I have never given birth). I was shell-shocked by this pronouncement and the bloody thing hurt before it was even opened but was once again told to relax and get on with it.

I left the appointment absolutely devastated at being lectured about my weight while feeling too vulnerable to assert myself. Fine, I need to do something about it but to launch immediately into a diabetes and heart disease lecture and then telling me that because I'm a bit chunky it means I must have a fat vag and offering no further explanation on the matter was just too much in my view.

I couldn't sleep last night tossing between wondering if I'm overreacting and feeling very upset about what happened. I phoned the practice manager this morning to discuss what had happened and was not encouraged. She skipped over the part about me trying to make an informed choice before deciding to screen and said "but you're 26 you should have had one by now" and "the nurse has been doing these on a daily basis for 30 odd years" and then rounded off by saying "not in any way to diminish your feelings about what happened" while having no comment on the fact that a weight lecture took up more of the appointment than some much needed reassurance about an invasive test.

I can't find anyone of any size who has been refused even a try with a smaller speculum and if I'm being honest I'm not massively fat, just pandemic misery has got me seeking dopamine in the biscuit tin but she could not have cared less about the state of my mental health. I'm still spotting and cramping which I had to find out for myself were side effects.

I won't repeat what the vast majority on here have said.
I just urge you to think twice about complaining. Frankly I think the NHS has enough on it's plate at the moment.
If you complain it will make the whole thing much bigger than it needs to be.
Put it behind you and forget about it. Medical procedures are never fun and the more fuss you make the worse you will feel. You have to learn to tolerate them for the long term benefit whether it's a filling at the dentist, a smear of something genuinely much worse.

You know that smear tests today only test for HPV, something that could be done with a much less invasive procedure.

As with any screening process and procedure there are pros and cons. There has been evidence (and I wish I could remember where I read it, think it was a book about female body autonomy) that the screening process can lead to women having cells on their cervix removed unnecessary, potentially causing problems with carrying a pregnancy to term.

They also of course allow others to avoid much more invasive cancer treatment by catching cells early.

Women can’t make an informed choice if they are not given the information on which to base their choice.

Also the screening process only starts at 25, the OP is only 1 year older

I think this thread has been harsh OP, I’d have been upset after the experience you describe.

I had a smear test as part of investigations at a sexual health clinic for recurrent thrush. They didn’t tell me they were going to do it, I was expecting a swap like what they normally do for thrush. I came away feeling quite violated.

YANBU OP

This was an intimate procedure you were nervous about, I’m lucky because smears don’t bother me, but I have enough sense and empathy to appreciate that some women find them uncomfortable, and some women are downright terrified of them, you should have been treated with sympathy and care. But you are a women so of course you are just expected to suck it up and get on with it.

If men were treated the way women were during medical exams there would be a lot more training and emphasis on patient centred care.

You’re right OP, there are pros and cons. Whether the nurse knew of them is another matter. Read the work of Dr Margaret McCartney if you want to find out more about screening tests.

That sounds horrible OP. Mines always been painless

Yeah at a medical appointment, totally scandalous 🙄🙄

Discussing weight in relation to the pill is normal. Giving a lecture is not. Unless your current weight is having noted adverse effects on your life, and specifically will interfere with pill use (which at the size given by the op would be extremely surprising), then an actual lecture about weight control/loss is completely unnecessary. Despite what Mumsnet users thing, most people who are a size 14/16 are not living the life of a beached whale, practically housebound, wheezing up a flight of stairs and is about to burden the NHS and society with their massive fat arses taking up 12 hospital beds.

That said, it is correct that overweight and obese women may need a larger speculum as there is essentially more (external) genitalia that needs to be supported.

Oh my fucking god. What?

@RichardMarxisinnocent

You are 26, you should've have a smear before now. Just wanted to point out that if someone has never been sexually active they don't have to have a smear, no matter their age. They can choose to have one, but it's thought that as the risk of cervical cancer for them is so low it isn't essential.

" I contacted my GP surgery to get a new prescription for my pill."

YAB ridiculous and it’s about time you acted more like a grown up woman than a petulant teenager.

A routine smear test isn’t available to every woman and in some countries you have to pay for the privilege. Be bloody grateful it’s being offered for free on a regular basis!

I had to have my coil removed a few months ago and it took my lovely GP, 4 very painful attempts to get it out and then I was referred for a cervical biopsy, which was even more painful.

However, I appreciated that in both cases, the medical professionals were doing their job as thoroughly as possible and a bit of discomfort is nothing compared to undergoing months of chemotherapy.

Oh and don’t get pregnant, unless you can afford expensive private healthcare.

Weight and the pill go hand on hand. Both make the risk of embolisms and DVT.

That’s why they go on about weight

Also jade goody was 26 when she was found the have cervical cancer. So it should of been done earlier if you’re having or have had sex.

Does that mean that because I’m fat, I’ve got a gigantic fanny?

Well. This is the first time on Mumsnet I have seen someone being told they are unreasonable for feeling uncomfortable with the smear process - and this seems a lot worse than some I have read.

YANBU. FWIW I’ve always been bigger, I’ve never ever been told a large speculum was required because of that, and I was never weighed or offered advice about my weight. I’m fat, I know that, I don’t actually need someone to weigh me and lecture me as I suppose OP doesn’t either . Maybe it’s different between trusts.

I agree with an earlier post by @Icanseegreenshoots - once the nurse knew this was your first time she should have been more gentle. I remember having a colposcopy and the nurse/doctor apologised because she only had the large size speculum instead of the small one and was very kind and put me at ease.

If she’s been doing the job for 30 years then maybe she should have some compassion for a woman who is clearly nervous about the procedure, rather than treating her like some kind of fool. Willing to have a conversation about blood pressure and diabetes but not why a larger woman might need a larger speculum? Whatever.

You’ve spoken to the practice manager so I personally wouldn’t bother complaining further, but I don’t think you’d be out of order if you did.

YABU. 100%. Nurses have a duty to give the facts and information out and a high bmi is one of them. There's tons on info on smears on the net if you didn't want one you shouldn't of gone.

I'm a size 14:16, 5ft 10
Smear done last year, never mentioned my weight, asked about my coil/medication/health conditions
Undressed behind a curtain, I asked for the small speculum as usual which was fine, took a few mins
I do bleed after for a few days as my cervix is dramatic but the cramping sounds not right

What an awful experience, especially for your first time, OP! I think some medical professionals really shouldn't be doing the job as they lack any compassion.

@Mistlewoeandwhine

Does that mean that because I’m fat, I’ve got a gigantic fanny?

Apparently so, and you and it are destroying the NHS! Nothing to do with the massive fannies down No 10 and all to do with silly women who are unsure about smear tests and carried on putting weight past toddlerhood....

YANBU. You should complain OP. Trust your own judgement, and be strong. It is an intimate experience, very nerve inducing. I will never have another smear test again because of a bad experience myself. I wish I had complained.

@MustardMitt

Well. This is the first time on Mumsnet I have seen someone being told they are unreasonable for feeling uncomfortable with the smear process - and this seems a lot worse than some I have read.

YANBU. FWIW I’ve always been bigger, I’ve never ever been told a large speculum was required because of that, and I was never weighed or offered advice about my weight. I’m fat, I know that, I don’t actually need someone to weigh me and lecture me as I suppose OP doesn’t either . Maybe it’s different between trusts.

I agree with an earlier post by @Icanseegreenshoots - once the nurse knew this was your first time she should have been more gentle. I remember having a colposcopy and the nurse/doctor apologised because she only had the large size speculum instead of the small one and was very kind and put me at ease.

If she’s been doing the job for 30 years then maybe she should have some compassion for a woman who is clearly nervous about the procedure, rather than treating her like some kind of fool. Willing to have a conversation about blood pressure and diabetes but not why a larger woman might need a larger speculum? Whatever.

You’ve spoken to the practice manager so I personally wouldn’t bother complaining further, but I don’t think you’d be out of order if you did.

In fairness it's also the first time on Mumsnet I've seen 2 separate posters saying that cancer screening is ineffective. I wonder if Jade Goody would agree?

@isitjustifyable

YABVVU.

You booked an appointment with a nurse for a service.

She gave you information about your health and performed the procedure you wanted.

I think she probably wanted you in and out as quickly as possible seeing as she is risking her own health to help others at this time.

Well let's hope you aren't in the caring profession..

I think it's important to remember that even a medical procedure that has absolutely no negatives attached, no risk of injury, 100% success rate, it's still totally valid to decline it. This is especially true for something so personal as a smear test. It's not like a vaccination where you put others at risk if you don't have it.

It's not okay that the nurse made you feel like that. She may have been stressed, under pressure, short on time, etcetera but that's not your concern. If the slots for smear tests are too short perhaps she should be raising this rather than being brusque with patients. For a procedure that has historically low compliance because it's embarrassing/awkward/uncomfortable I think it's important that they actually try to make it less so.

And there are negatives of smear tests, the NHS even has them on the website. For example, treating cells that would have returned to normal on their own. So it is actually important that an informed choice is made.

Well, if nothing else you've prompted me to book mine.

Wow OP people are giving you a really hard time here. So much for the sisterhood. I'm over 50 and a nurse although I work in a different profession now. I thought I had my act together yet the first time I had a mammogram the radiographer was so rough and brusque that I cried in the car outside. You were in a vulnerable position and should have been treated with kindness and respect. I'd definitely voice my concerns in writing to the GP practice. Try to be as constructive as possible. On the positive side I hope your smear comes back normal and I'm sending you a socially distanced hug.

If you can’t advocate for yourself then you need to have someone you trust come to medical appointments with you.

Both the smear test and the chance to discuss your weight could literally save your life. Don’t complain about it.

I always thought Jade Goody had smear tests but she had a very rare form of cervical cancer that smear tests don't detect.

My friend died last year of cervical cancer, having just turned 30 and was diagnosed at 27.

She left a devastated husband and a gorgeous 2 year old who won’t remember his mum.

I personally feel the physical and emotional discomfort you went through is absolutely minute.