Page 3 | Lodger eating my food

Confusedashell12 · 2021-01-12T23:46:04+00:00

My lodger has admitted to eating food out of my pan - leftovers from what I cooked, that I went back and put into a container to eat the next day. I must have been gone for no more than 20 mins. She claims to have had one spoon. I find this utterly repulsive. AIBU?

FortunesFave · 13/01/2021 00:51

Bad tummy ache

Omg.

TooManyKidsSendHelp · 13/01/2021 00:51

Sounds like you're making a huge fuss over absolutely nothing, so either you need to chill out, or she's grating on you in a number of other ways and this is the straw that broke the camel's back.

If it's the latter, which I suspect it probably is, then maybe it's time for you to find a new lodger.

user1473878824 · 13/01/2021 01:09

I sort of get where you’re coming from, it being a bit gross, but can’t really put my finger on why.

I am hugely confused why you think you got a stomach ache from the left overs because she ate it though. But it wasn’t food poisoning?

Mulhollandmagoo · 13/01/2021 01:12

And you think you got a tummy ache because your lodger took a spoonful of your leftovers out of the pan?? Because I don't think that's the reason

It's not great, no and I'd be annoyed, but words such as 'repulsive' and 'invasive' are a massive overreaction. You don't like her, nor want to live with her so ask her to leave

1forAll74 · 13/01/2021 01:14

Repulsive is a strong word to use regarding this issue.You actually need to tell her not to do it again if you find this Repulsive.Odd things to post about !

MissMarpleDarling · 13/01/2021 01:42

I don't even like it when my bf does that it's nasty

pelosi · 13/01/2021 01:44

In fact I developed a bad tummy ache soon after I had the left overs - and I never, ever get bad tummy aches

You’re being ridiculous OP, you can’t get sick from someone eating a spoonful of your food.

I don’t think you’re suited for lodgers.

Sinful8 · 13/01/2021 01:47

@NoOneOwnsTheRainbow

Because you keep your spoons dirty? *@Sinful8* funny how on another thread you're being outright nasty telling everyone to wear a mask or they'll drop dead, yet here you're going in the opposite direction. Are you confused about basic hygiene and how germs get around or just very thick?

Most people don't live with the other customers in tesco.

Sinful8 · 13/01/2021 01:51

@NoOneOwnsTheRainbow

Because you keep your spoons dirty? *@Sinful8* funny how on another thread you're being outright nasty telling everyone to wear a mask or they'll drop dead, yet here you're going in the opposite direction. Are you confused about basic hygiene and how germs get around or just very thick?

Wait, are you some absolute lunatic who licks the spoon before they use it?

So instead of clean spoon into the pan you just gob all over it then touch the food.

Rather than food first mouth second?

Sorry I'm thick and clearly I have forgotten the order of touch for eating.....

sparticuscaticus · 13/01/2021 02:03

OP
Yes it's not very nice to find out she did that. But surely the solution is to say "Right you are never do that again. Don't touch my food or help yourself direct from saucepan to something I've cooked. It's something I am not happy about for many reasons including hygiene"

Did you tell your lodger off? I'd do that first before I thought about getting rid unless the rest is a deal breaker.

I don't mind my DCs testing my food from pan but I police any double dip attempts with an "ewwww... gross... get another clean spoon..!!"

SheldonesqueIsUnwell · 13/01/2021 02:16

I used to have this by the minkiest git at work. ‘Oh it looked really nice - I couldn’t resist eating it/trying it, etc’

The thought of him double dipping my stuff made me cowk.

I then found out he hated mustard. Luckily I don’t. So I slathered a coating on top of a pie/macaroni etc. So he picked at stuff from underneath.

Everything I had from them on had heaps of mustard IN it as well.

My personal favourite was creme caramel with Dijon. Quite a lot of it. Piped in with a small syringe. The stink eye I got for that.

Didn’t stop him though.

He was apoplectic when I vacuum sealed my bags over my signature. That stopped it.

DeeCeeCherry · 13/01/2021 02:18

Disgusting. & Who's to say she didn't dip her spoon in more than once? Other people may be cool with that kind of thing but you're not, and thats fine.

You have to have a thick skin when it comes to taking in lodgers. If you don't, at times it's more trouble than it's worth.

You aren't saying what you want to do about it you're just complaining, and that's after not pulling her up on the spot about it. So I suspect having a lodger really isn't good for you.

CostaDelCovid · 13/01/2021 02:36

@Stealhsquirrelnutkin

That's gross, I would be furious. Anyone who trusts that she took a clean spoon and dipped it into the pan once is very gullible. If she was hungry she probably put the spoon in her mouth, then back into the food several times. I would warn her that any second offence would lead to her being given notice. Some people are just disgusting. I had a visitor who dipped their finger into a jar of lemon curd "just to see what it tastes like". I was tempted to throw up into her handbag, just to see what it smelled like, but instead I handed her the jar and told her to take it with her and go.

Jesus Christ what an insane overreaction. You sound unhinged

CostaDelCovid · 13/01/2021 02:37

@PrankedByLife

I agree, it's dirty / unhygienic. Did she at least take one mouthful with a clean spoon and then put the spoon in the sink? I don't know what culture you are from but in Indian culture utensil swapping, crockery swapping is as good as someone spitting in your food. Disrespectful. The tramp should have at least asked you if she good have some - she's a thief.

Tramp?

AmelieTaylor · 13/01/2021 02:38

PRE Covid I wouldn't have liked it. I wouldn't have minded if she'd put some into a bowl fir herself, but NO double dipping in my food!!

OH can double dip, we do far more 'gross' things. 😉

Other people, it depends on who & it's not terribly logical. Like I'd share a drink with my Dad (if necessary or I wanted to try something he had), but not my mum. - nothing to do with hygiene.

Some friends, not others.

Most little kids.

Pretty much anyone in a drinking environment.

Oh to be that carefree again....

CostaDelCovid · 13/01/2021 02:39

@SheldonesqueIsUnwell

I used to have this by the minkiest git at work. ‘Oh it looked really nice - I couldn’t resist eating it/trying it, etc’

The thought of him double dipping my stuff made me cowk.

I then found out he hated mustard. Luckily I don’t. So I slathered a coating on top of a pie/macaroni etc. So he picked at stuff from underneath.

Everything I had from them on had heaps of mustard IN it as well.

My personal favourite was creme caramel with Dijon. Quite a lot of it. Piped in with a small syringe. The stink eye I got for that.

Didn’t stop him though.

He was apoplectic when I vacuum sealed my bags over my signature. That stopped it.

What does 'cowk' mean please? Is this a new word?

SheldonesqueIsUnwell · 13/01/2021 02:40

It is scottish for retching costa

CuppaZa · 13/01/2021 02:41

Are you worried she double dipped OP?

SheldonesqueIsUnwell · 13/01/2021 02:43

And my stuff was clearly labelled, he was asked not to touch it and he always had last month under his fingernails and beard.

His other trick was drinking anything I left in the fridge and leaving that well known beverage 20p in its place.

Once I got to work I had to stay there so getting out for anything else was impossible. And he knew it.

thosetalesofunexpected · 13/01/2021 02:43

Hi op
I do sort of get understand where you are coming from
She should have asked if she could have a teaspon sample of food.

This is obviously diisresptful and unhygienic behaviour especially with Covid 19 about)towards you
And needs to be nipped in the bud

As this kind of disrespectful behaviour Can Often reveal itself in other ways too.

You need to tell her not to do that cause its disrespectful

Also it would be really irriatitating get right under my skin,and Piss me off a lot having someone like your Lodger often breaking personal stuff,and them having to be replaced..😬
This is very Care less/thought less Crap behaviour too.!
I would be very worried about Something of very sentimental value it sounds like its a matter of time it would get damaged and it would Not be /feel the same paying for a replacement item,
Plus it could be bit too much difficult/hazzle or Nigh on impossible to do so..

I wonder if Lodger has a co ordination disorder like Dyspraxia or something else?
End of the day your Lodger does not sound like the right fit with your life style and values etc.

I think its time for your Lodger to Either Change /Improve their their Ways to your Liking?A.s.a.p(As soon as possible)
Can you risk it though with stuff getting broken etc often
Or
Just tell her give the required amount of notice for Lodger to find somewhere else to. Live.

Its easy for other Posters to say you are over the Top when it does not affect them.
often certain people/Posters can be Hypocritical like that,it would be different if it affected them.

Also I know its difficult times making ends up money wise
And obvious nice having Lodgers money coming in.

I would really Consider whether having Lodgers in your living spaces/sharing your home is something you are cut out for/up to
Its not I am critizing you in any way,
But sharing your house with a Lodger is not something everybody likes,
Maybe you would be better being a Landlady/Landlord and have your own place without Any Lodgers living with you.
And to rent out to Lodgers separate property instead .😕

alexdgr8 · 13/01/2021 03:07

it is unhygienic, and the fact that some people say it doesn't matter is worrying. some people's standards are very low.
i couldn't live like that, with someone like that.
OP give her notice to quit. 28 days should be enough.
your home should be your safe place, not all this stress.

oakleaffy · 13/01/2021 03:16

@Dogissue

YABU for the use of 'tummy ache' unless you're 5.

I wouldn't like the dipping a spoon in my food, but I'd just make sure I didn't leave it lying about in future.

Haha!

I say ''Gut pain'' or ''pain in the guts'' after catching Norovirus last year.
Fast acting and grim.

IF the Lodger had Noro, and ''Double dipped'' her spoon, I suppose a gut ache {With eruptions} might be possible?

''Tummy ache'' does sound quite 5 yr old ish.

hellejuice91 · 13/01/2021 15:47

It isn't something that would personally bother me, but I do know it would bother my Husband.

But I think your reaction to it tells me there has probably been a number of other incidents and that you aren't happy with the lodger in general, maybe it is time to revisit the living situation?

In conclusion:
YANBU for not liking the fact she did it
YABU for not thinking where this over reaction may have come from

Wheresmykimchi · 13/01/2021 15:49

@Confusedashell12

sinful8 because I don’t believe it was just one spoon and she isn’t the most hygienic person

In fact I developed a bad tummy ache soon after I had the left overs - and I never, ever get bad tummy aches

Course you did.

Wheresmykimchi · 13/01/2021 15:51

@alexdgr8

it is unhygienic, and the fact that some people say it doesn't matter is worrying. some people's standards are very low. i couldn't live like that, with someone like that. OP give her notice to quit. 28 days should be enough. your home should be your safe place, not all this stress.

All this stress