AIBU - surely the majority of people enjoy spending time alone?

[Swingometer]

I'm slightly bemused by a recurring theme in the "what do you like that other people don't like" thread where multiple people have said 'being alone'

Now I'm not suggesting we all want to be alone 100% of the time but surely having some time on your own is desirable for the majority of people?

I can only think of 2 people I've known who genuinely didn't seem to take any comfort from being alone and preferred to have a companion 100% of the time. You don't need to be an introvert to enjoy some peace and quiet and the opportunity to do exactly what you want for a few hours.

YANBU - yes I prefer to have some regular alone time and so do most people I know

YABU - it's unusual to enjoy alone time and majority of people don't like it

I think it depends whether you have kids or not. I used to get super bored on my own but now I have DD I love time on my own!

Yes, I'm sure that's a factor @royalbloo as things tend to become more desirable when they aren't as easy to obtain!

I have friends who flat don't understand how annoyed I am that DH is ALWAYS THERE now.

DH does understand, fortunately, though he doesn't get much opportunity to leave these days.

There's just something so wonderful about a still house and having every part of it for yourself. It's not that I hate company, on the contrary, I enjoy it a lot. I usually get a bit of time whilst he's commuting, but that's buggered now.

I love lots of time on my own.

I don't have kids either. 🤷‍♀️

I love my family, but I love just being alone. @thecatsthecats. yes that feeling is lovely!

Personally I am very happy in my own company. Doesn’t mean I don’t socialising and meeting friends for drinks etc in the ‘ good old days of 2019’😀

I do think people should be able to cope with spending a decent amount of time on their own. I lived alone when I bought my first house aged 21 but then had friends who moved from their parents straight in with a partner. If a person like that suddenly ends up on their own in their 40’s (for example) would they find it so easy ?

I love being alone. My sister has never ever been able to happily spend time on her own. Different strokes and all that.

I’m never on my own as I have 4 children full time, I’ve always been a bit jealous of people whose kids go to the dad because I would love to be alone sometimes, but I got told not to be as they probably are devastated being away from their kids 😒 I thought it was normal to want some alone time but perhaps it isn’t!

Love spending time alone

I love being alone.

Ever since I was a child. Right from my first job, I've picked jobs where I'm almost entirely alone. My most miserable experience was when I worked in an office with other people for 6 months. It made me depressed. Soon went back to working nightshifts entirely alone.

I lived alone until I was married, had few friends. I really don't mind being alone.

I love my Dh and children. But I cannot stand the rest of the world, I'm not one for friends.

Of course most people enjoy spending some time alone but if they acknowledged that the people who have built their identity around their unique sensitivity and importance as an introvert (which is a tiny but vocal minority of introverts, most introverts aren't at all self-important or tedious about it but MN has a disproportionate number who are!) wouldn't get to feel so very, very special.

I love being alone. I very very rarely get it these days.

From january to september last year I was never alone in the house as there was always someone in it and it drove me crackers.

The only time I'd get alone was in the 15 minute drive to work and back and then I was furloughed so that put the shutters on that.

I love time on my own, as do DH and DS. Luckily we have enough space at home that we can all have a few hours to ourselves around the house if we want to.

My SIL just cannot be on her own. She gets up, does whatever she has to do at home and then she’s out - spends all of her free time round at friends and family homes. Even during this lockdown she seems to be permanently round at the house of the family she’s bubbled with.

I spent 90% of my time alone now I wfh and live alone. I can go days without speaking to anyone in real life. I find that it doesn't bother me but I do get out of practice and can find chatting hard work when I do have to do it.

Of course they do, and as you say, it's not about being introverted (though of course many people are). Most people need some alone time.

It comes down to being introverted vs extroverted. People think introverts are antisocial but that’s not always the case. It’s just the introverts recharge by having time on their own while extroverts recharge by being with people.
I read somewhere it’s about a 60/40 split of extroverts to introverts. I think extroverts would have you believe that introverts are weird! There’s no right or wrong it’s just different. DH and I are both introverted. He’s been WFH since March and I found it incredibly difficult not having time to myself.

@hardbackwriter spot on. There seems to be a huge misunderstanding that if you aren't an introvert then you must love company and noise 100% of the time. In reality most us like a balance.

I always love time alone before and after kids

I hate being alone. I get lonely very easily and have a low tolerance for it.

I think most of us especially at the moment need some tone alone

But then there are those that rarely need the company of others

I have been on holiday and travelled on my own and loved, lived in my own for many years but I am social too so like to be around people but I can quite happily do things alone I know for many people they don’t like to

I love being alone. That doesn't mean I don't like people or spending time with (some of) them. But I am very self-sufficient and have no understanding of how people can get bored. Literally. I just don't get it. There is always something to do, somewhere to go. Boredom is just really odd to me.

I think extroverts would have you believe that introverts are weird!

Personally, I have never ever seen this. The most extroverted people I know are extroverted because they like people, and all the different types of personality there are, and they are very accepting. They like the fact that we are all different.

But I've seen so many self-proclaimed introverts going on about how weird they think extroverts are (with strange implications of moral superiority) that I've had to mute about five of them. I see a post on here along those lines more or less every day.

For whatever it's worth, though, I don't think these people understand what introversion is so I don't really trust them to know if they are introverted or not. They seem to think that being an introvert means being a deep, profound thinker while extroverts are shallow, loud and brash attention seekers. They're idiots, obviously, but this looks to me like the dominant narrative.

I love being alone. So does dh. We are together all the time along with ds as we are in lockdown. It has been bliss. We all have introverted personalities so there is sometimes hours where we don't interact with each other.

I need alone time.
I also need external company.

One of the draining things about lockdown is the constant presence of DH working in the house and his calls booming out of his "office" and the constant presence of the DCs., but virtually no input from any external company.

It depends on the situation. Usually I don't mind living alone because I have work, friends etc. In the current situation I hate it because I'm on furlough, no support bubble so I'm alone 24/7 indefinitely & that is completely different. It's soul destroying