To think its almost a right of passage

[AriesTheRam]

To have your arse handed to you on thread you've started.

Been a member for years but I remember my first post not going down too well
I name changed and licked my wounds and ive learnt what goes down like a lead balloon and what doesn't.
Have you ever had a bashing on a thread and was it a surprise at the time?

I’m not brave enough for posting threads really! I once posted on someone else’s thread with an opinion that was against the grain, and got my ass handed to me. I was drowning in pnd at the time, and I was so scared and upset about it that I felt sick even checking my emails as there’d be another notification telling me how thick I was. I did apologise, even that didn’t call off all of them.

Have NC since then, and don’t post my opinions on threads where I don’t agree with the majority, or there’s a fight going on. I just can’t stomach the backlash!

Yup. Don't post anything about your religion (even in the dedicated board)!

Yep, my very first thread was on baby names.... it didn't end well.
I had to have a thread removed once when I was outed, it could have caused me a world of shit if it hadn't been. Lesson learnt and I rarely start threads now

@2bazookas
That made me laugh 😂

Oh yes. An innocuous lighthearted one about my beanpole teenaged boy eating giant bowl of pasta, not half an hour after a huge roast dinner. I was sexist, causing eating disorders, abusing my children, setting them up for malnourishment..... so bad was the piling on that MN had to intervene on the thread

Still don't quite understand what was in the air that night!

Yep, me too. I deleted my account over it. I posted in AIBU fully prepared to be told that I was unreasonable but was not prepared for the sheer vitriol over a relatively trivial point.

I replied thanking people for their input and accepting that I was unreasonable in that case, the nastiness carried on for another seven pages!

People do love to latch on to a small point of ab OP and blow it up out of all proportion

Yes I agree.

I think the ones that disagree with what you say come on louder and stronger than others. If they have any guilt about what is being said they appear to shout even louder. Then there're the really vile ones just ignore them (almost everyone else does) - some must have very sad lives if that's what they spend their day doing.

I posted about my neighbours using their hairdryer for drying their clothes for hours and hours in the evening and was told that I was being unreasonable.

It was all through summer too, so no excuses!

Reading threads recently I noted the following.

Don't post about your weight (unless you are large and attempting to lose weight) and you must be large not just a bit bigger than normal otherwise you will get fried alive.
Never criticise students since the mothers will skewer you alive after all their precious babies can do no wrong.
Never say anything bad about cats.
Baby names - prepare to be called all sorts for your choice of 'lower class' names - pick something that the MN's decide is 'niace'
Vegan - vegetarian - don't even go there.
Relationships - even if you have a very small concern and want some advice you will be told to go NC, LTB, report the weirdo, take him for everything, get your ducks in a row.
Trans - don't even open your mouth. Say nothing.

There are some very extreme views on here

@Ineedalargeone

Reading threads recently I noted the following.

Don't post about your weight (unless you are large and attempting to lose weight) and you must be large not just a bit bigger than normal otherwise you will get fried alive.
Never criticise students since the mothers will skewer you alive after all their precious babies can do no wrong.
Never say anything bad about cats.
Baby names - prepare to be called all sorts for your choice of 'lower class' names - pick something that the MN's decide is 'niace'
Vegan - vegetarian - don't even go there.
Relationships - even if you have a very small concern and want some advice you will be told to go NC, LTB, report the weirdo, take him for everything, get your ducks in a row.
Trans - don't even open your mouth. Say nothing.

There are some very extreme views on here

That was my weigh thread.

I naively stated numbers and got an absolute kicking!

@eattolose

I saw. I knew where you were coming from. Some get really angry about weight. It's a real shame, I think it prevents people asking questions in the long run.

Lots of lurkers don't comment. The vocal over the top ones tend to pile on. Ignore them.

[quote Ineedalargeone]@eattolose

I saw. I knew where you were coming from. Some get really angry about weight. It's a real shame, I think it prevents people asking questions in the long run.

Lots of lurkers don't comment. The vocal over the top ones tend to pile on. Ignore them.[/quote]
Yes I flounced in the end. Ignored the crazies!

@eattolose

I posted about my neighbours using their hairdryer for drying their clothes for hours and hours in the evening and was told that I was being unreasonable.

It was all through summer too, so no excuses!

Is your neighbour on here. She probably thinks she is being reasonable. Perhaps suggest she gets a tumble dryer?

Luckily those neighbours have moved! It was 30 degrees and we have gardens and washing lines. Completely baffling

Yep. I witnessed a horrible thread where a new mother had posted because she had been depressed in pregnancy and was worried she didn’t feel PFB about her baby. She was attacked by a couple of posters and accused of showing off for being a ‘cool mum’ because she didn’t do bonkers things.
It was really fucked up. I’d just had my baby had been worried about something similar and had been hoping for some help but the OP never came back after that.

Yes. Circumstances have made me a sahm. This apparently defaults that I am a wrong un.

@bravoy

I think there are threads that you just know will incite the rage & the OP will need to run & hide. However there are some inconsistencies about MNs I don't get e.g knocking on someone's door without a warning is unacceptable (never met anyone who thinks this) so is accidentally forgetting to pay for a chocolate bar. However reporting someone for benefit cheating is a sin & putting an offer 10% under the asking is akin to eating babies (who doesn't do this?!!). Vanity & bragging is bad unless it's on SM in which case mind your own business. AIBU wouldn't exist if people minded their own business. 😆

Depends what part of U.K. you are in - very different in Scotland

I came on mn to get advice and see the real world but some days it’s a joke.
The genuine people that care and respond nicely.
The witches that rip you a new one and just slag everyone.
The humble braggers that ask in “ innocent “ way but want to brag how rich they are .
The “ I’m not sure how I made it this far” because no one can be that stupid.
Flame away.

Why does it sting so much, though? They are just words on a screen but I can physically feel the anger and wrath when I read the words. It can leave me reeling.

Then sometimes you feel you are being tripped up into saying something in too simplistic terms which hands them the response they want to give; other times I feel hijacked by their thwarted interpretation of events instead of holding my own.

I am shocked that the most frightening thing as bout it all is that these probably are decent people in the real world - just behind a screen the venom comes out.

It’s rite of passage, not right of passage.

Now RTFT, and see Raspberry noticed that as well. Wondering now if it was on purpose OP? Starting a thread about bashing with an obvious mistake...

@PlanDeRaccordement case in point.

Yeah I posted a reverse and I had nooo idea those were hated lol 😂

@HOkieCOkie

Yeah I posted a reverse and I had nooo idea those were hated lol 😂

Not only hated but against Talk Guidelines. They are very annoying and disingenuous.