To find people's duplicity towards key workers upsetting

[hibbledibble]

On one hand, it's 'clap for carers' and praising NHS staff as 'heroes'.

On the other hand, the amount of vitriol towards key workers who need childcare so they can do their jobs is shocking. In addition, the public that praises us, also ignores lockdown rules, causing even greater strain to the NHS.

I am a doctor, and I was redeployed during the first wave. It was horrific. I am still recovering now, and seeking treatment for PTSD. I have seen many of my colleagues become seriously unwell, and others have died.

We don't want claps (in fact, please don't) but decent, safe working conditions (including proper PPE), and sufficient childcare. I can't work from home, so my children (primary and preschool age) need to be cared for.

I admit I am taking this fairly personally as I have seen first hand the absolute horror that this virus has caused, and have been traumatised by it. My hospital is well over capacity, and people are dying waiting for ventilators.

I dont think anyone minds genuine key workers having school places - those providing essential front line services - like doctors, nurses, supermakrket workers etc. What is really getting my goat is that half of my kids primary school is in - more than 300 people all claiming to be "kwey workers" when i know jolly well many of them arent, and would have no more hard ship working from home and homeschooling than i am. some even have one stay at home parent - or 2-3 hours of work, yet a full time place.

Surely you can see how that would be just a tad annoying for poeple stuck at home with full time jobs trying to juggle it all for god knows how long. Tbh, i'm surprised more genuine "key workers" arent getting annoyed about this too. You're a doctor trying to help out with the virus, yet have no problem with so many kids going into school? seem odd to me?!

Either schools are open for everyone, or should be shut for everyone apart from people who are essential and need the childcare/support to enable them to do their job. As it stands, school are shut for some and open for som - no ryhme or reason really.

i've written to the school and my MP about it - i suggest people who feel strongly do the same. with half of pupils across the country still in, what's the point in closing schools at all?

I won't be clapping. It will make the bottoms of my cul-de-sac neighbours twitch and set their WhatsApp groups alight I'm sure but after work I just want to take in my shopping, have a hot bath and have an early night.

I don’t know why you’re calling it duplicity, it probably isn’t the same people with the opposing views you’re talking about

I work in a primary school and I have no issue with PROPER keyworker's children being in but I'm getting increasingly pissed off at the families with one keyworker parent and the other a SAHP. It's an utter piss take, putting myself and my colleagues at risk.
One child's parent is a painter and decorator!!! How on earth is that a keyworker???
The list of 'keyworkers' is far, far too broad.

I am so sorry for what you have been through @hibbledibble.
I hope you find peace.

I think @hibbledibble there are a few but it appears more out of their frustration to get a place in school and I suspect not directed at NHS workers but at critical workers they deem less worthy - yesterday directed at accountant/office/financial services.

Without NHS workers far more would die so top of the list for childcare/school places

You have totally missed the point. No one begrudges places to people where for instance both resident parents proper key workers. But where someone is claiming a place because they work as a secretary for a charity looking after water-voles whilst their DH is an accountant also WFH people are pissed off and rightly so for so many reasons.

As an aside I m really sorry you’re suffering ptsd, I’ve had complex ptsd since childhood and adult trauma led to full blown ptsd. It’s a misunderstood illness, people have such double standards about mental illness. Look at all the people who have no clue about the inability of such people being unable to wear masks because they’ve been smoothed during a rape etc. I really hope you get the help you need. From experience EMDR has great success rates. Yoga and mindfulness really help.

What jumped out about the clapping was that people used it as an excuse to socialise at close quarters in the street (either not socially distancing or yelling potential covid breath across other people) and effectively having a big street party covid spreader event.

It was and will be stupid - especially with a more transmissable strain. Total disaster.

I'm really disgusted by how awful people are about key workers. I also think people are being really over the top about the impact on over all development. I really don't think in a year or two it's going to make a difference.

I don’t think anyone is moaning at actual key workers who need a school place because they can’t work from home.
But threads seems to be full of examples where people arnt genuine key workers and do work from home but say ‘I can’t possibly do my job and home school’. And ones where another parent is wfh yet they still send children in. So as usual it’s the minority making a bad name for the majority.

@Catrina123

I dont think anyone minds genuine key workers having school places - those providing essential front line services - like doctors, nurses, supermakrket workers etc. What is really getting my goat is that half of my kids primary school is in - more than 300 people all claiming to be "kwey workers" when i know jolly well many of them arent, and would have no more hard ship working from home and homeschooling than i am. some even have one stay at home parent - or 2-3 hours of work, yet a full time place.

Surely you can see how that would be just a tad annoying for poeple stuck at home with full time jobs trying to juggle it all for god knows how long. Tbh, i'm surprised more genuine "key workers" arent getting annoyed about this too. You're a doctor trying to help out with the virus, yet have no problem with so many kids going into school? seem odd to me?!

Either schools are open for everyone, or should be shut for everyone apart from people who are essential and need the childcare/support to enable them to do their job. As it stands, school are shut for some and open for som - no ryhme or reason really.

i've written to the school and my MP about it - i suggest people who feel strongly do the same. with half of pupils across the country still in, what's the point in closing schools at all?

You have summed up the situation perfectly-this needs sorting ASAP it’s a two tier educational system half the kids seems the standard. I know there’s at least one parent wfh. The problem with so many “key worker” kids being in is that the bubbles are much more likely to burst then people who need the place are going to be stuck.

I really think employers need to start being pulled up.

The guidelines say school places are for children of parents who are critical workers. Clearly a lot of companies are claiming their workers are key workers to keep their businesses going and putting unreasonable pressure on their staff.

The government need to take a lead here.

@hibbledibble I'm a keyworker but have no children so haven't experienced this. I just want to say Thank you, what you're going through is much harder than

Sorry, much harder tthan what's happening to me and I wish you all the best

Is this stuff that real people have said to you or things you have read online?

I'm a GP and have not heard any negativity whatsoever towards health workers accessing school spaces. Or indeed anyone who has accepted a keyworker school space.

It sounds like you have been at the absolute thick end of dealing with this pandemic and I wish to thank you. It also sounds like you are burnt out.💐

I understand why you're annoyed at some of the things. I'm not a key worker and got annoyed at my neighbours who were out clapping every week while merrily breaking the rules the rest of the time. It was therefore meaningless.
The NHS discounts thing, to me, depends on who is moaning about it. If a carer in a care home was moaning I could probably see where they were coming from for example, as they probably equally deserve it. It doesnt bother me personally.

Agree with a lot of peoples comments on key workers and school places.

It must be a horrendous time for you and your colleagues and I'm sorry, and I understand that it must be so frustrating when you see the public do things that make the situation worse or moan about things that can't be helped or come up with ridiculous conspiracy theories

YANBU

I think most people would want healthcare KW places to continue

I understand your frustration, especially given what you've seen through work. I understand the rules to mean "stay at home and keep DC at home if at all possible". I run a food bank (so a key worker by some definitions, and with plenty of friends encouraging me to call myself one!), DH wfh in a conventional non-critical role. DD (3) is staying home though nursery is open. The more people mix, the higher the rates, the longer these restrictions will go on for.

The clapping is moronic, and I echo the statement of others that where I live the people most keen on doing it are the very scum who were in and out of each others homes daily during the first lockdown. The ones who had a big party on New Year's Eve will doubtless be out in force tonight.

A lot of the negativity expressed towards NHS and other key workers comes purely from frustration. It's the same thing that makes otherwise reasonable people mouth off to the call centre person on the other end of the phone - it's not their fault that they are understaffed, underpaid and overworked, but they are there and ready for a bit of verbal abuse.

The closest I've come to being verbally abusive myself was seeing NHS person after NHS person jumping the queue at the supermarket during the first lockdown. I'm a "key worker" too, I work long hours and I struggle to find time to fit my shopping in, but I get no special treatment. (Naturally, I held my tongue, just let the anger build up within me whilst visualising them taking the last packet of pasta.)

@TheYearOfSmallThings

Nobody is begrudging your child a key-worker space at school, and I find it difficult to believe you think they do. People are however raising eyebrows at the accountants, IT managers and many other workers who are suddenly identifying as key-workers.

Then the schools need to be checking more thoroughly if the person is on the official government key worker list. And depending on the industry, people in sections such as IT are included on the list.

I have seen vitriol and the rest of you are being really disingenuous.
In particular, teachers trying to teach live with very young children in the house have been told "you should suck it up, the rest of us have to".
As I posted in my own thread (not a teacher, just annoyed!) key worker child spaces are to benefit the clients/patients/pupils of the key worker. Not to benefit the worker themself.

@drspouse

I have seen vitriol and the rest of you are being really disingenuous. In particular, teachers trying to teach live with very young children in the house have been told "you should suck it up, the rest of us have to". As I posted in my own thread (not a teacher, just annoyed!) key worker child spaces are to benefit the clients/patients/pupils of the key worker. Not to benefit the worker themself.

you should suck it up the rest of us have to but that’s true!! Teachers are working from home as they demanded!

Not at all the situation of the OP who is not working from home.

i think some of the negativity about keyworkers places may come from the fact that they keyworkers list is so extensive . however some of us keyworkers in retail like me wouldnt mind being furloughed . not all of us keyworkers are loving it so we get to send in our kids to school . those of us in my store are more than a bit pissed off , because we have a pharmacy we have to stay open , but far from ppl coming in to just buy meds ,stuff for baby and collect prescriptions ,they are more or less knocking themselves out buying make up , half price xmas gift sets and fragrance , yesterday a woman wanted to test 3 diff fragrances which of course she kept taking her mask off to smell them smh . as my workmate said we are being put at risk having to serve ppl buying a load of shit they dont need because we are forced to stay open . yes it may be keyworkers are loving it because their kids can go to school , but thats really only a genralisation , not all of us are . but of course the bottom line is that if you are a keyworker and there is not choice about not going in why should you not take up the school place . to be fair i think a lot of companies have designated themselves essential in order to keep going and its not the fault of the staff who work in those places . my company has said we are all keyworkers , although only a small handfull work in the pharmacy , the rest of us are your bog standard sales assistants , the shop could shut and just sell or give meds out via the door , but of course they want to keep taking as much money as poss so its business as usual and we are all exposed to the risk so its not all just a black and white issue when it comes to keyworkers

No-one has any issue with a doctor's children going to school, especially if you have no other childcare. I do however judge my neighbour who is merrily sending in her kids when her husband works in management for a major supermarket (not a driver, admits himself he can do a lot from home) and she is a SAHP.