To find people's duplicity towards key workers upsetting

[hibbledibble]

On one hand, it's 'clap for carers' and praising NHS staff as 'heroes'.

On the other hand, the amount of vitriol towards key workers who need childcare so they can do their jobs is shocking. In addition, the public that praises us, also ignores lockdown rules, causing even greater strain to the NHS.

I am a doctor, and I was redeployed during the first wave. It was horrific. I am still recovering now, and seeking treatment for PTSD. I have seen many of my colleagues become seriously unwell, and others have died.

We don't want claps (in fact, please don't) but decent, safe working conditions (including proper PPE), and sufficient childcare. I can't work from home, so my children (primary and preschool age) need to be cared for.

I admit I am taking this fairly personally as I have seen first hand the absolute horror that this virus has caused, and have been traumatised by it. My hospital is well over capacity, and people are dying waiting for ventilators.

@Biscusting

I won’t be joining in on the clappy clap clap because I believe it to be some government ‘all in it together’ pish designed your keep the Facebook-Chester-drawers-selling types obeying the rules.

No offence to any NHS staff, appreciate what you do.

This is an ugly thing to say. Whether it's true or not there's no need to assume people with poor spelling are idiots.

Some of them have dyslexia and other learning disabilities. It's not that they're dumb.

Literally the opposite I think OP. Frustration reserved for those who are sending children into school because they can, not because they absolutely must. Abs the frustration is because people want to protect the community and therefore the NHS, including g you and your colleagues.
Not sure why you would find that upsetting?

"But this post , and it’s framing, pissed me off , and I voted YABU."

Completely agreed - there is very little vitriol towards keyworkers? If you read the posts more carefully it's directed towards people that using resources that perhaps don't need them or fudging their keyworker status.

Perhaps it's the PTSD affecting you and making you over sensitive to perceived critisism? Being serious here. "Seeing" things and gross over interpreting are bad signs, check that you are not stressing your loved ones by jumping at any"slight" either.

I agree with Hibble to me the tone of some of the posts about one key worker families getting a school place etc do seem a bit snide - and also missing the obvious - if people have to share childcare/education responsibilities they are less available to work when the NHS needs all the overtime, bank shifts, staying on at the end of your shift, that it can get.

That’s all it is - not a perk - it’s so that we can be here in the covid wards, where I am right now - because we have so, so, so many patients and not enough staff.

I can’t believe people read your post and responded with scornful contempt that they find it ‘hard to believe’ or that you’re being a martyr.

Well actually I can believe it. So many people really are just utter dicks, aren’t they.

Oh wait Bizawit was pissed off by the framing of your post? The framing? Another massive tool.

It sickened me in the first lockdown that people going out in their nhs clothing to the supermarket were verbally abused, spat on etc. YANBU. People are vile. Not all - but the nasty ones are the most memorable.

There are many careers that are rewarding that don't involve being paid nothing for being abused

No one has an issue with key NHS workers kids going to school.

Thanks for all you do but I have voted yabu for the above reason.

OP thank you for everything you do.

I'm not in the UK but if I were, I count as a key worker because of the sector I work in. However, I'm a lawyer. Nothing in the world will collapse if I generally work around childcare and stick my children on screens for any urgent calls/work. The world also won't collapse if said urgent call gets interrupted by a child. Happens all the time with my colleagues with younger kids. I actually like it - it's acknowledging children and family life exists and that is only a good thing in my view, particularly for women.

There is no way I should be entitled to a key worker space. It would be morally, if not legally, wrong for me to take one, so increasing the number of children in school and making lockdown less effective. It also means employers don't have to be flexible. I can't have too much vitriol for individuals taking lawful entitlement because of people are at the end of their tethers but I don't like a system that allows it.

Genuine keyworkers should have spaces, even if they can WFH if their work cannot realistically be done around childcare. That includes where there is only one keyworker if the other parent is working.

The anger isn’t aimed at genuine key workers like yourself. It’s aimed at people like my partners ex who has sent the kids to school as she works in essential retail - she’s a sahp that sells body shop at home!

@hibbledibble completely agree with your post.

I'm a nurse and yesterday received an email saying that we no longer need to wear FFP3 masks with covid positive patients - a surgical mask will do it. I thought - oh great - they're running out of PPE again,,,,

None of our staff have had a vaccine yet.

The clapping thing is a total fucking joke. Of course I very much appreciate all ICU/respiratory medicine doctors and nurses - but will be applauding in my head only.

No one has mentioned anything about HCW and keyworker status. The increase in the definition of keyworker, and those now taking up the system is the issue. The rules have been relaxed to allow a much larger proportion of workers to access this- and that's where the issue is.

Unfortunately people just don't think or care about how the country actually runs. They do see people like you op because they know that poorly people and hospitals need doctors so I'm not sure people do begrudge you a keyworker place. I work in supported accommodation and DH works in IT infrastructure (currently looking at remote working for everyone) both public sector. We cannot be furloughed..I would actually be £200 better a month if I was furloughed on 90% wages but not paying for childcare. This means we have to access childcare. Its not a 'well we are both wfh so don't need it' it's a management expectation and I will be sacked without it presumably then leaving only people without young DC in our team. The clients in my placements still need support, people still need paying and managing, safeguarding still needs raising and monitoring etc and I could be called out at any moment in an emergency. Unfortunately people literally don't give a shit that me and DH have busted a gut along with our teams to keep the background bits going. People don't clap for us. They don't care. All we get is shit for using a keyworker space. I've only been back from mat leave for 18 months, was told to shield in the first wave in March, worked to the bone in between and now in lockdown again. My own parents are livid that I am taking a nursery space because they feel I (not my DH of course) should just take the hit. My MH is in the toilet and I will leave the public sector as soon as I can..so much sacrifice for so little..it isnt even a stable job as we've seen constant restructure and reduncancy in the past 5 years. A lot of good workers will be lost.

arethereanyleftatall

I haven't heard a single person say that! In fact, the opposite is true - people are opposed to every man and his dog claiming to be a key worker BECAUSE there needs to be spaces for the children of theNHS.

But it's the government who have created the list of those they class as key workers.
So why not blame the government?
Rather than the people just trying to do their job?

Another poster mentioned IT managers.
Yeah cos the NHS don't use computers!
People need to stop being so bloody judgemental and let people get on with their lives!

Apparently only nurses & doctors need key workers places. I.T, finance not considered essential in the NHS or schools for example. Many support staff can't work from home as they are helping with testing for example & then you have GPs who are working from home because you know that's the advice & will also reduce transmission.

I haven’t seen what you describe at all op. I have been embarrassed to see some posts by my fellow NHS staff on social media and I am not comfortable with hero worship but most people have been really supportive.
In the main it’s brought out the good in people.

I have no DC but because my DH are both classed as key workers we would presumably be given a place if we did have kids.

I would not class either of us as a real key worker, my boss is very supportive of other colleagues with dc at home and has never suggested that any of them use key worker status to get the kids a place at school. So it would be wrong morally for any of us to use a place, a couple of the guys have partners in the nhs and teaching so are doing the majority of childcare and teaching with this and he knows it.

Normally we are all expected to be workaholics and do really long 7am latest to 6pm earliest time often much much later and weekends if needed, so it’s not that he is normally a nice caring boss, he isn’t. We have strict deadlines and whatever we do isn’t good enough. Not just me the entire team.

I don’t think all key workers are equal, I think some people have let the key worker status go to their head because they have that label. I also agree that if there is a SAhP that unless there are very specific reasons then taking advantage of a place is wrong as well

I think the NHS staff do a great job in horrible times.

This is a completely straw man argument. No one complains about looking after critical workers who have no other childcare provision, or vulnerable children. You may see some school staff concerned that we are still running high numbers in classes with no ppe and the press is telling everyone we are closed.

Schools are vectors of transmission and iy doesn't help the nhs or you if we don't get the numbers down.

Well said OP. Thank you for all you’ve done and I hope you recover fully.

I agree with you OP, I see it a lot from various people on lots of threads. Not all the people on whole threads at all, but random people.

I also have a frontline NHS DD living here at home who is back in counselling because all her older MH problems have reared their ugly heads again in the last few weeks due to the enormous strain she is under at work. The 12 hour shifts on reduced staffing levels with increased workload are relentless.

All she wants is people to follow the rules and for a properly funded health service. She hated clap for carers.

Keep going OP, you are doing an amazing job and we can’t manage without you, the end is just over this last hill.

Much love 💐

I hear you, OP.

No vitriol here, just profound gratitude for your efforts this year. Will continue to follow the rules. Will continue to use my vote to vote for parties that pledge to protect the NHS. Thank you for everything you have done.

@trixiebelden77

I can’t believe people read your post and responded with scornful contempt that they find it ‘hard to believe’ or that you’re being a martyr.

Well actually I can believe it. So many people really are just utter dicks, aren’t they.

Oh wait Bizawit was pissed off by the framing of your post? The framing? Another massive tool.

Yes @trixiebelden77. That’s how I responded. I’ll explain why. Things that upset me about this post:

1. the statement that “people who broke lockdown rules” are the reason that the NHS is overwhelmed. Don’t get me started on that.
2. The statement that “people are dying waiting for ventilators (misleading and false)
3. The OP’s positioning of herself as a victim (never mind the countless others who have suffered inexorably over the last 9 months) and apposing of herself to other members of the public who don’t work for the - omg - NHS, that sacrosanct institution that is beyond criticism and requires all sacrifice, worship and praise. (Those other suffering people are just the naughty lockdown- breakers who apparently cause this mess). (Lesser side point- 4) The irony that OP feels injured by those hurling vitriol at people suffering without childcare. As has been pointed out by numerous people on this post, those people hurling this sort of vitriol would never include a - gasp - NHS doctor! They do it to other more lonely individuals, in the very name/ service of people like OP! Enabled and emboldened by the kind of sensationalist claims OP chose to make in her post!)

I am done with all of it quite frankly. These are insidious discourses that have been used to manipulate the public, turn communities on one another and inflict profound suffering on enumerate communities , from the disabled, to the poor, from children to the old and frail, those living in care homes, those dying from other conditions, I could go on and on and on but I won’t.

I appreciate my view isn’t popular , but I’m not afraid to say it nonetheless.

*lowly individuals, not lonely individuals

*misleading and manipulative I should have said

Where are you seeing the vitriol about having a school place? Oh here most of the posts specifically caveat that it's important NHS staff get places, the frustration is those who don't need a place but want one and fudge the system. Discounts are a sore point to many during the pandemic as they have lost their income, I don't agree that people should begrudge them, but I can see why and don't think it's an indication of what they think of staff. People are frustrated, those who need treatment and can't access it are likely scared, worried, but again, most acknowledge it isn't the fault of staff, but the system they are frustrated with.

I don't really get the rage towards the clapping, I didn't do it as it's twee, but aside from the social media like seekers, many genuinely just wanted to show appreciation. Individuals at the moment cannot give you a pay rise, they can't order you more PPE, or magic more staff out of thin air; so during a global pandemic when people had their lives changed beyond recognition, they spent 60 seconds a week clapping. Then you moan people don't show support, what other way do you propose?

@Backbee

Where are you seeing the vitriol about having a school place? Oh here most of the posts specifically caveat that it's important NHS staff get places, the frustration is those who don't need a place but want one and fudge the system. Discounts are a sore point to many during the pandemic as they have lost their income, I don't agree that people should begrudge them, but I can see why and don't think it's an indication of what they think of staff. People are frustrated, those who need treatment and can't access it are likely scared, worried, but again, most acknowledge it isn't the fault of staff, but the system they are frustrated with.

I don't really get the rage towards the clapping, I didn't do it as it's twee, but aside from the social media like seekers, many genuinely just wanted to show appreciation. Individuals at the moment cannot give you a pay rise, they can't order you more PPE, or magic more staff out of thin air; so during a global pandemic when people had their lives changed beyond recognition, they spent 60 seconds a week clapping. Then you moan people don't show support, what other way do you propose?

@Backbee - sensible and measured post.