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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you answer a quick question to help dd with her sociology course please?

106 replies

UserID · 31/12/2020 17:28

It’s following on from the Train dilemma where you are asked would you pull a lever, leading to one death but saving five?

DD’s question is basically would you pull the leaver to save the 5 strangers if the one person on their own is a close family member such as your child or parent.

I’ve put it in aibu for the voting.

Yanbu: I would save my close family member rather than the five strangers

Yabu: I would save the five strangers rather than the close family member.

OP posts:
BeyondMyWits · 31/12/2020 18:00

I'd save my child before I saved myself, let alone 5 strangers.

NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace · 31/12/2020 18:00

I would save my family member over five strangers. The age of the strangers is irrelevant to me. They are what it says on the tin: strangers.

covidaintacrime · 31/12/2020 18:01

Other family members are more disposable!

Bloody brutal but true Grin I'd maybe sacrifice one family member if they were very distantly related and very old. But I imagine by "family member" it means immediate family?

Doublechins · 31/12/2020 18:02

I can't vote but I'd save the family member

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 31/12/2020 18:02

@TheGirlWhoLived

I would save my child over every other outcome available. Other family members are more disposable!
This

I did vote yanbu

riotlady · 31/12/2020 18:03

I voted close family member but it depends who it is- my sister, daughter or partner, absolutely, parents not so much

Calmandmeasured1 · 31/12/2020 18:04

Family member without a doubt. If I had to choose between my parent or five 8-year olds, I would still save my parent.

ScrapThatThen · 31/12/2020 18:06

In New Scientist letters last week someone said leaving the lever halfway would derail the cart and save everyone. Not the point, I know. Its a very important question for driverless car technology.

AlexaShutUp · 31/12/2020 18:06

I would save my child over anyone else. If the one person was my parent, I'd probably save the five strangers as that is what my mum or dad would want me to do.

I couldn't ever pull a lever that would kill my child, no matter how many people it might save. I don't know if that's right or wrong, but I'd rather kill myself first.

TheGirlWhoLived · 31/12/2020 18:07

Haha, it’s been a long year!! There’s definitely some older family members that would jump at the chance to save 5 and sacrifice themselves- even 50+ that would give younger parents, children, teenagers etc the opportunity to live their life. I think children being involved change the outcome massively

SendHelp30 · 31/12/2020 18:08

I voted to save my family member over 5 strangers

SantasBritchesSpelleas · 31/12/2020 18:08

It would depend which family member.

I don't have children but I would pull the lever to save my cats.

JacobReesMogadishu · 31/12/2020 18:10

Depends if I liked the family member or not. I’d have happily thrown my mother off a moving train even if it didn’t have the added benefit of saving 5 strangers. 😁

TheKeatingFive · 31/12/2020 18:11

Frankly, I’d be concerned about someone who genuinely thinks they’d save 5 strangers over their own child.

We’re hard wired to look after our own. It’s part of why we’ve lasted so long as a species.

RichPetunia · 31/12/2020 18:14

I voted to save my family member. I don’t know the other people so I’d feel less guilty sending them for the chop.

HavelockVetinari · 31/12/2020 18:15

I would save my child or spouse over a whole city. Wrong, but true. DH says the same.

HavelockVetinari · 31/12/2020 18:15

Mind you, I'd want DH to pull the lever on me - just not on our wee boy!

Mommabear20 · 31/12/2020 18:15

Not a straight forward answer as it would greatly depend on the 6 people.

Are the 5 parents? Do people depend on them? Is the 1 person a bad person?

Honestly would have to be a decision in the moment

sweetchristmastime · 31/12/2020 18:16

There's an episode of The Good Place which deals with this

TheGoogleMum · 31/12/2020 18:19

I voted to save family member. Logically not the right thing but it would be too difficult to cause the death of a loved one I think. Not pulling the lever might mean 5 die but although you could have prevented it you didn't cause it so the guilt may be less!

Blowingagale · 31/12/2020 18:20

I have a feeling I’d be paralysed with fear and indecision so it would just be whatever was set that would happen.

OverTheRainbow88 · 31/12/2020 18:22

The Trolley Problem which is used to explain utilitarianism.

I would save the most in that situation, unless I knew the one person. Then I would save the one over 5 strangers, I think.

WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 31/12/2020 18:27

Family member

I can't think of one family member I'd sacrifice to save strangers and some of them are bloody annoying, but they're family...

I don't count my SIL as family. I'd save the strangers.

Original poster
UserID · 31/12/2020 18:28

It’s such a fascinating question. It seems quite clear cut at first but as you start to throw in the variables it becomes a really difficult dilemma so solve.

For me, I save my family member every time.

OP posts:
tara66 · 31/12/2020 18:30

Of course one won't save strangers - they may all be mass murderers or paint their entire houses in grey.