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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband refusing test

76 replies

Interestinglyenough1 · 30/12/2020 21:11

Husband has gone to his sisters two days ago, she recently became a widow and has him in her support bubble.

Due back tomorrow, he tells me he has body aches and a very bad headache and has been making himself hot drinks to feel better. As he’s not the type to complain this has alarmed me.

AIBU asking him to get a test before he returns home? Or being hysterical. I am vulnerable with underlying conditions.

OP posts:
OrigamiOwl · 30/12/2020 21:13

Have you spoken to him about getting a test? Why has he refused a test?

RedMarauder · 30/12/2020 21:13

Even if he gets a test he won't get the results until he's home with you. Results can take up to 5 days.

RealMermaid · 30/12/2020 21:14

He should stay at his sister's, isolating if possible, and not return home until he has a negative test.

BlueSuffragette · 30/12/2020 21:16

As you are vulnerable and have underlying conditions why is he refusing a test? Better to know than not know. Best of luck to you both x

Timbucktime · 30/12/2020 21:19

Does he have one or more of the 3 symptoms the NHS list to have a test?

AndcalloffChristmas · 30/12/2020 21:20

He should definitely stay where he is until he’s had a test and got the results.

Do you have children?

Kisskiss · 30/12/2020 21:40

He should have a test, I had body aches and no other symptoms, but tested positive for covid. If you’re vulnerable he definitely needs to test before he sees you

Chloemol · 30/12/2020 21:43

He should get a test and stay where he is until the results come through

Raerae7 · 30/12/2020 21:46

Needs to get a test but don't the NHS only do them if you have cough, temp, or loss of sense of taste/smell?

If the above is true, can he take his temperature to see if he'd be eligible? He should take his temperature anyway tbf.

If possible he should stay at sisters and wait for test result. If no temperature or not eligible

If paying for a test, it might be preferable to pay for one with a rapid result if he is able to / can afford it, as then he'll be able to come home sooner.

Raerae7 · 30/12/2020 21:47

*if no temperature or not eligible, perhaps he'll need to pay for a test.

HeddaGarbled · 30/12/2020 21:49

Might he have a hangover?

Original poster
Interestinglyenough1 · 30/12/2020 21:50

Thank you all, I suggested a test and he said he knows he doesn’t have it. I’ve asked SIL to take his temp.

OP posts:
Hairyfairy01 · 30/12/2020 21:50

He has none of the main symptoms of COVID so no, he shouldn't do a test. The 'rules' are quite clear on this one. By sticking to this 'rule' it will prioritise the tests / results to those most likely to have Covid and enable a more efficient track and trace and decrease transmission rates. Of course he may have COVID, equally quite a lot of us probably have without any symptoms.

Maryann1975 · 30/12/2020 21:57

Lots of areas are giving tests to those not displaying the main three symptoms and some areas are even testing those who have no symptoms at all. We are one of the few areas who are seeing cases drop and the council have been testing anyone who wants a test for a couple of months now.

So please stop saying that you can only get a test if you have the main three symptoms because it is not true in a lot of places. I’m not seeing anywhere that there is a shortage of tests anymore. We needed one for Ds earlier in the week and booked a slot for 15 minutes later, so certainly no shortage round here-the results were back in 21 hours, so no backlog in the labs either.

I don’t think you are being hysterical for getting him to test before he comes home, I think it’s sensible. Why put another household at risk when there is an alternative.

Original poster
Interestinglyenough1 · 30/12/2020 22:04

His temp is alright but he’s taken paracetamol. We’ll see his temp tomorrow but he’s staying there tonight. Nightmare!

OP posts:
Hairyfairy01 · 30/12/2020 22:06

@Maryann1975

Lots of areas are giving tests to those not displaying the main three symptoms and some areas are even testing those who have no symptoms at all. We are one of the few areas who are seeing cases drop and the council have been testing anyone who wants a test for a couple of months now. So please stop saying that you can only get a test if you have the main three symptoms because it is not true in a lot of places. I’m not seeing anywhere that there is a shortage of tests anymore. We needed one for Ds earlier in the week and booked a slot for 15 minutes later, so certainly no shortage round here-the results were back in 21 hours, so no backlog in the labs either. I don’t think you are being hysterical for getting him to test before he comes home, I think it’s sensible. Why put another household at risk when there is an alternative.
Fair enough, you make some good points. However as a front line worker I still don't have access to these lateral tests, if a member of my household gets a high temp etc I am still forced to isolate for anything between 2-7 days until their results come though. I am still having to work with patients who are awaiting COVID results, often for around 2 days. I think a lot depends on where you are in the country?
SirVixofVixHall · 30/12/2020 22:08

@RealMermaid

He should stay at his sister's, isolating if possible, and not return home until he has a negative test.
This.
rookgizzardpie · 30/12/2020 22:10

he shouldn’t get a test if he doesn’t have Covid symptoms...

Purplethrow · 30/12/2020 22:10

If he went to his sister’s two days ago then he could have been with you while (if) he had covid but before the symptoms started.

Original poster
Interestinglyenough1 · 30/12/2020 22:13

Thank you all I’ve read every response and will update. I had to stop DM from ringing him and telling him to stay away as she’s so worried about me.

Possibly I could develop symptoms too if he had it before symptoms showed so we will see.

OP posts:
PinkiOcelot · 30/12/2020 22:15

People are testing positive for COVID without the 3 main symptoms so yes, he should get a test.
I rang the COVID hotline for my daughter as s she didn’t have the main symptoms. They still advised getting her tested. I think that ‘rule’ no longer exists.

Comefromaway · 30/12/2020 22:20

My area are requesting that anyone with symptoms such as fatigue, headache or sore throat get a test. Results are usually back between 24-48 hours

Locationunknown · 30/12/2020 22:22

has him in her support bubble

What do you mean by this? He can't be in her bubble as he is not a single person.

She could be in his bubble if she is not mixing with any other bubbles.

The way you've worded it sounds like she has various people supporting her which would mean lots of different people popping in and out. Therefore lots more people could be infected and passing it on.

Original poster
Interestinglyenough1 · 30/12/2020 22:29

@Locationunknown

It means she is the only adult in her household who can have a bubble with one other household.

OP posts:
Original poster
Interestinglyenough1 · 30/12/2020 22:30

Thanks all, I may give them a call tomorrow if he hasn’t got a temperature and see if they can advise.

OP posts: