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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Husband refusing test

76 replies

Interestinglyenough1 · 30/12/2020 21:11

Husband has gone to his sisters two days ago, she recently became a widow and has him in her support bubble.

Due back tomorrow, he tells me he has body aches and a very bad headache and has been making himself hot drinks to feel better. As he’s not the type to complain this has alarmed me.

AIBU asking him to get a test before he returns home? Or being hysterical. I am vulnerable with underlying conditions.

OP posts:

ellenleaves · 30/12/2020 23:18

Second reporting the symptoms on the zoe app. I have been invited for a test twice via that after reporting minor symptoms that weren't the main three and went one time.

Norwayreally · 30/12/2020 23:19

I know lots of people who have tested positive now. DH’s elderly Grandad had it last month and the only symptom he had was a sore throat. Know a few asymptomatic people and only one who was really ill with it, he said it was like the flu so body aches, chills, fever, exhaustion, hallucinations at one point. None of them had a cough.

LittleBearPad · 30/12/2020 23:29

Limiting the symptoms to headache, temp and loss of smell/taste on the official app is going to make lots of people keep wandering around with COVID. They really need to be updated!

Catsneezies · 30/12/2020 23:35

Why isn't this being reported in the media? I really think the stupid three symptom thing is fuelling things. I might email my MP.

Northernsoullover · 30/12/2020 23:39

I wish MNers would stop banging on about the 3 fucking symptoms. I wish the government would update it. I've been contact tracing and 99% of my cases have a headache. Very few have a fever, fewer have a cough. Loss of smell usually kicks in on day 3. Knowing what most of us know my partner lied to get his test (positive) my friend lied to get hers (positive) for the love of all things holy if you feel unwell book a test. There is no shortage.
Please just stop telling people not to test. My partners symptoms were headache and fatigue, my friend headache/sinus pain. If they followed the MN diktat they wouldn't have tested and could have carried on breathing their covid breath everywhere.

Cyberattack · 30/12/2020 23:43

Two people I know have tested positive this week. Neither had the "3 NHS symptoms". One just felt very tired, the other had a headache.

Catsneezies · 30/12/2020 23:47

Its not MN diktat though is it? Its PHE/NHS rules!

Catsneezies · 30/12/2020 23:47

...which are stupid!

LittleBearPad · 30/12/2020 23:52

And quite easy to break to get a test if you feel ill. Just tick the temperature box. No one will check

LittleBearPad · 30/12/2020 23:53

And if you don’t want to break ‘the rules’ use the Zoe app. It will likely tell you to take a test and you can tick that box on the COVID website with a clear conscience

Thegreymethod · 30/12/2020 23:54

@Houseplantmad

Be warned, the testing system is creaking. Our results took five days.

Sorry to jump on to the thread but that's interesting to know, I'm waiting for test results now on day 4 of waiting and had convinced myself I'd inputted my details wrong. I didn't realise it was the same for lots of people. Annoying as I can't go back to work till I get the results back and if the result is negative I won't get paid for the days I've missed

Confrontayshunme · 30/12/2020 23:58

My only symptom was a bit headachy (never get them) and tired ...lost my smell and tested positive five full days later.

Sacredspace · 31/12/2020 02:04

I don’t have any of the main symptoms, I have the same symptoms as your husband.
I have tested positive, the new strain presents quite differently x

BluebellsGreenbells · 31/12/2020 02:08

Own isn’t the time for him to bring anything home. The last thing you need is to be ill with anything, there are still other bugs about.

It will be harder if you have children

Tell him to stay where he is until he feels better, and get a test to be clear it’s not COVID.

Aprilx · 31/12/2020 05:03

He should definitely not get a test as he does not have any covid symptoms.

When you go to order a test you are asked to confirm that you have one of the three main symptoms listed; headache, body ache and wanting hot drinks are not there.

It is no wonder there is a test shortage when people are ordering them for just about everything.

MaryLeeOnHigh · 31/12/2020 07:44

@Aprilx, have you read any of the thread? The symptoms quoted definitely are covid symptoms, and that is being generally accepted by NHS and testing staff.. If people with covid refuse to get tested because they don't tick one of the NHS three symptom checkboxes, they won't be self-isolating and will spread the virus exponentially.

BrightonForWine · 31/12/2020 07:54

My husbands like this.

Book him a test, give him a the time to arrive for it and tell him he isn't coming home until he goes there.

DanielRicciardosSmile · 31/12/2020 07:54

@Thegreymethod have you got the barcode number from your test? When I had my test back in November, they told me to ring 119 and give them the barcode if I'd not had a text/email after 72 hours.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 31/12/2020 08:00

Of course he should test. To not do so, and return home to you as a vulnerable person, is selfish and inconsiderate.

If he can get to a test centre before lunch the results will come back quicker due to pick up tomes.

saraclara · 31/12/2020 08:15

@Aprilx

He should definitely not get a test as he does not have any covid symptoms.

When you go to order a test you are asked to confirm that you have one of the three main symptoms listed; headache, body ache and wanting hot drinks are not there.

It is no wonder there is a test shortage when people are ordering them for just about everything.

There isn't a test shortage. I went a few days ago up a drive in testing centre. There was only one other car there and nominee else arrived while I was there.

Peope not going because they don't fit the outdated symptom list, is what's fuelling this latest variant's spread. Do you really want people with covid wandering around and spreading it?

saraclara · 31/12/2020 08:16

Nominee=no one

Suzi888 · 31/12/2020 08:21

@Aprilx

He should definitely not get a test as he does not have any covid symptoms.

When you go to order a test you are asked to confirm that you have one of the three main symptoms listed; headache, body ache and wanting hot drinks are not there.

It is no wonder there is a test shortage when people are ordering them for just about everything.

That’s not true, especially in a tier 4 area.

Kisskiss · 31/12/2020 15:18

Yes the symptoms guidelines are misleading. My husband had no temperature, a runny nose and coughed maybe 5-10 times each day .., I had body aches and nothing else, we both tested positive ( I really didn’t think I would! )

Northernsoullover · 31/12/2020 17:23

@Aprilx

He should definitely not get a test as he does not have any covid symptoms.

When you go to order a test you are asked to confirm that you have one of the three main symptoms listed; headache, body ache and wanting hot drinks are not there.

It is no wonder there is a test shortage when people are ordering them for just about everything.

April, There. Is. No. Shortage. Of. Fucking. Tests. Have you not read anything? To add to the people that lied to get the test I can add another friend. Symptoms: rash, bodyaches. Covid positive.

butterpuffed · 31/12/2020 17:42

A friend had really bad diarrhea , had the test as her son was positive and she was positive too. It was her only symptom.

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